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Introduction:
For those of you who have stumbled across this and don’t know me, my name is Ted Hudson, I’m a 22 year old student studying for my final year in Film and History at the university of Southampton. Like many over lockdown I looked at myself and tried to work on an aspect to change my life for the better, which was difficult for me as my scroll of flaws by that point was out the door and rolling out onto the road. Starting simple I chose picking up running as a hobby and losing weight; although it was a completely miserable affair for the most part – it paid off. Nearly a year later, despite a few setbacks and mishaps, I’m a bit healthier, a little less heavy, slightly less miserable and looking to do something semi-decent, in this case a 10k run for men’s mental health, the subject of this fundraiser.
Reasons for the run:
Even though I was alright over lockdown, it hasn’t been the same for a lot of people. Suicide, referred to by WHO as the silent epidemic, is the greatest killer of men under the age of fifty. And it’s not just suicide; male mental health, be it addiction, mental illness or general forms of self-destruction, is a major issue, one that has only become worse over COVID. It is an endlessly complex and unpleasant topic, one made all the more upsetting by the fact that every single guy I know has a story about them or a mate struggling with issues they’ve never properly dealt with.
I was twenty, sitting on the phone talking to a mate on Falmouth docks. It was late and I’d left the night out for a quick break. A dude I’d only met once or twice came and sat down next to me; he asked me if I was alright and said he’d stay with me if I needed it. Very drunk, he told me about his best mate who’d killed himself a few months prior, and about how no one should feel alone. I assured him I was alright and he left after sitting with me for a while. He remembered my name and face; to this day I can’t remember his, but his story has always stuck with me; in a few slurred sentences, he not only exhibited the best of human kindness but also brought to light this issue in quite a raw manner. He was a member of the rugby team and I’d judged him as a bit of a blockhead lad without much thought. I never accounted for the fact he was a person with feelings, nor what he and other lads like him might’ve had to deal with. But it’s not just a problem about toxic masculinity or about societies’ expectations, it’s also about available resources, outreach, emotional literacy, media influence, cultural change and clashes, the demonization and ridicule of struggling men. The list goes on and is daunting. Which is why its lucky there are much better people than the rest of us who have dedicated a large part of their lives to these problems who we can help out.
The Charities and Summary:
The charities in question are firstly Men’s Minds Matter, a charity started in 2009 as part of a research project into men’s mental health; now it is a research and public awareness charity. Founded by two surfer dudes, I’d recommend checking their website, it is incredibly informative and well put together. The second charity is James’ place, a men’s suicide prevention charity operating in Merseyside and London. Started by parents who had lost their son, James, to suicide, they offer free therapy for any man who might need it. Check out their website as well, they do truly amazing work.
To raise money, (because I can’t grow facial hair for movember without looking like a complete neckbeard) I’ll be running a cross country 10K on the 27th of November. It’s not a very long run for a 22 year old, but please take into account that I am still built like an outhouse, and I’m not quite Mo Farah yet. Please give whatever you can and if you can’t, find a dude who looks lonely on a night out or in class or work and ask if he is ok: he probably won’t tell you what’s going on with him and you won’t change the world but a little bit at a time is all it takes.
If this by any chance reaches the lovely man who sat with me on Falmouth docks, I would also like to say thank you, sorry for judging you and I hope you and yours are doing as brilliantly as they deserve.
PS- If we reach 1,000 pounds raised, me and a few of my mates will be making a short skit on the training for this endeavour as a target marker and a thank you, it will be humiliating, punishing and should be quite funny. If you would like to see Tom Brooker dangling a burger on a string out of his car as I run after it with the Rocky soundtrack playing in the background, please give generously.