Help Us Put the Pieces Back Together

Hello, my name is Kaitlyn. On December 11th, 2021, my family received a phone call that would forever change our lives. Daughter, Sister, Mother, Titi. Jillian Feliciano passed away. In that moment, the world shifted, our hearts collectively slowed, and we each held our breath. The reality that we will never be able to hear her voice, smell her perfume when we give her a hug, or see her beautiful face in front of us is a tragedy.

Anyone who ever had the privilege to meet my Titi knows how profound of a loss this is. The bounciness of her curls. The sparkle in her big eyes. The bright light of her smile. The joy in her laugh. The warmth in her hugs. The love and memory of each moment we were blessed enough to spend with her on this earth will reply in each of our minds forever.

Among the joy and the laughs, there was a pain in her soul. A battle she faced on her own. Mental illness, and the stigma around it, is widely known, but barely understood. Addiction coupled with mental illness is a burden that many in the world face today. So many of us wanted to help her, so many of us tried and tried, till

we could not anymore.

When it got to a point where our words were not enough, we trusted that the healthcare system would be able to help where we couldn’t. They have the tools, they have the resources, they have the schooling and the knowledge, that is supposed to benefit those who need help the most. Each trip she spent in a doctor’s office or hospital room compiled into a stack of reasons as to why my aunt should not have been allowed to leave the hospital. Every note written by a healthcare professional detailing the circumstances of her visit added to the stack of reasons why my aunt should not have been allowed to leave that hospital. Every conversation my aunt, or my family has had with a medical professional on her behalf, is another addition to the reason why my aunt should not have been allowed to leave that hospital.

When a person is battling something like what Titi was facing, it is not a simple “I need help.” It is a culmination of actions and choices that are made that make it so that others have to intervene. My aunt should not have been allowed to leave that hospital in the condition she was in. When multiple family members are begging that she is not released, when there are a million and one signs that showed she should have been kept and observed, it is impossible to understand why she was let go.

The thought that this same situation has happened to countless other families and they are feeling the same hurt we are, is reprehensible. No one should ever have to go through life feeling as though someone would still be here, if the healthcare system treated those dealing with mental illnesses or battling addiction with respect and care.

She is not leaving only leaving us behind, she is leaving behind 3 children. My cousins, 21, 14, and 8 years old, will continue on without a mother. There is no amount of words that will have the power to soothe their souls. We can only hold them a little closer, hug them a little longer.

My family is asking for any help at all, for funeral costs and to provide trusts to her 3 children. The money will never heal their wounds. But I’d like to think that the financial security can alleviate the burden. It is the least we can do for Titi.

All we can do now is honor her memory and her life, not only the good, but the struggles too. They were apart of her life and we need to remember them so that we can enact change.

Do not worry, Titi. You can rest now. We will take care of one another. We will fight for you. Just rest.