My name is Claudette. Due my upbringing I have always felt embarrassed unlovable and fat my whole life. If the narrative was that I was fat and no one would love me because I was fat. I guess I fulfilled that narrative. I did become fat. I had no self esteem. Families can really mess you up.
I never suffered from high blood pressure or diabetes so my doctors never even spoke to me about my weight.
Right before CoVid I had Bariatric surgery because I had trouble with my legs compiled by my weight and couldn't keep up with my granddaughter. After surgery and alot of mental & emotional work, I realized I was important, loveable, a really good person, my family was wrong. I needed to stop allowing my past to direct my story. Weight wise, I lost a whole person. Because of Thyroid Cancer I ballooned up to 400 lbs. Lost 100 and couldn't lose any more, that's why the gastric sleeve surgery in 2019. After the surgery and maintaining since then, I weigh 163 with about 20+ pounds in excess skin just hanging off my body.
I thought I could deal with it and not let it bother me but it does, it reminds me of how much time I lost being the real me. After 2 kids, breastfeeding my breasts look like utters. My stomach I can't even describe, lol. I hate looking at myself or anyone else looking at me. I knew going into it I couldn't afford the "mommy makeover" surgery alot of women have after weight loss but I figured no big deal I can deal with it. Years later it is a big deal. My legs still hurt because of the hanging skin. My back hurts because of my utters and belly. I know looks aren't everything. I just want to be the me I should have been.
As a teenager I was the weight I am now but was always told I was fat. Looking at me now I know they were crazy. I think they didn't want me to get sidetracked and focus would stay on my dysfunctional family. It worked and benefited them.
As embracing as it is I have attached pictures of my body. If the only thing I can accomplish is having my breasts removed, I'll do that.
I know there are bigger issues in the world. So I understand if no one is interested in helping me.
God bless and give yourself a great day!