I WANT TO START WITH THE GIFT.
The gift is a compilation of songs, sung by me and my dear friend Adam Michaelides. He plays guitar and we both sing harmonies. I created it especially for this fundraiser. The CD is called
We Will Get There: A Celebration of Love and Children.
sample song: on children
Other tracks on this CD:
We are --Sweet Honey in the Rock
In This Heart--Sinead Oconner
Scarborough Fair--Simon and Garfunkle's version
Cat's in the Cradle--Harry Chapin
Wild Mountain Thyme--Traditional
Good Night--Sweet Honey in the Rock
Circle Game--Joni Mitchell
This Love Will Carry--Dougie Mclean
Angels Watchin' over Me--Traditional
We Come From the Mountain--Harry Bellafonte
Thunder Holy--Daniel Farmer
The Rose--Bette Middler
Annie's Song--John Denver
As I went through the process of making this CD, it has been so special for me, and so healing in a very personal way, that I actually want to share it as a gift, whether you donate or not. I would love be able to raise thousands of dollars but if you are not able to give anything, I still want to send you the CD, if you want it. Just email me the request, along with your mailing address, and I will send it. I would just ask for $8.00 (via the Donate Now button) to cover postage and the cost of printing the CD.
So here it is, my first and only CD, with the support of Adam Michaelides and Mark Kelso (he gifted us the use of his music studio), in all it’s beauty and imperfections, for better or for worse. Email a request for your copy and provide a mailing address, please. My email: [email redacted]
THE REQUEST IS FOR FINANCIAL CONTRIBUTION TOWARD A HEALING JOURNEY FOR MY SON, ELIOT.
A LITTLE BACKGROUND ABOUT ELIOT:
Eliot is the middle child of three. He is 12 years old. Those who know him well all say that he is unbelievably “smart,” “brilliant,” “perceptive,” “has a vivid a imagination,” and many other things. And those who know him and know our family well also know that he has been suffering and struggling for a long, long time. He is nothing like his two brothers, who are quite healthy and well-adjusted.
I am only recently beginning to piece together the puzzle that has baffled all of us for so long. Some of the behaviors we see at home on a daily basis include screaming, hitting, threatening, hurling insults and foul language, throwing things, slamming doors, isolating himself, chewing his sleeves and collars morning till night (I buy a lot of shirts), pacing the yard for hours a day, and displaying a general aversion to being touched, to name a few. Needless to say I have been worried as a mom and my life at home has been quite stressful.
This summer Eliot was diagnosed with a severe case of misophonia (basically an intense reaction to sounds due to not being able to filter out meaningless noise—it’s a neurological issue) and more recently with sensory processing disorder, which affects various senses in a variety of ways. The diagnoses are a huge relief. It gives me a direction to go in though it is not as straightforward as I would wish it to be. There is no pill or surgery that will cure it. It’s way more subtle and complex than that.
What I want most for my children is for them to have every chance to live in happiness, with inner peace, and to experience love and success in their endeavors, starting in the present. I want to have the peace of mind to know that I have done all I could to contribute to their well being as they grow and in their preparation for a more self-responsible life as adults.
As one friend reflected back to me so eloquently, I am committed to supporting my son’s well-being, in whatever form it takes. For Eliot, this includes tracking down the most accurate diagnoses and the most effective therapies for him and finding the money to pay for them.
THE STRATEGIES WE ARE CHOOSING: A HEALING PROGRAM
As I get deeper into the diagnostic process and seeking out and trying out various therapies, it is clear that it will require quite a lot of out of pocket expenses, as it already has. It will also require a lot of trial and error, as well as patience. Insurance pays for some things but most of what seems like it will be the most useful is not covered. I am going with conventional evaluation and diagnoses (a psycho-educational evaluation, including an occupational therapy evaluation, learning assessment, executive functioning assessment, as well as an audiologist evaluation, and allergy testing.) I am researching both conventional and alternative therapies.
I have been doing a fair amount of research and everything seems to point to a "soft approach" of therapies that address overcoming limitations of the nervous system and supporting the nervous system as a whole, as well as healing trauma, where possible. This last one has been extremely elusive, as hardly anyone seems to want to work with kids around healing trauma. Eliot did have a traumatic entry into the world. Due to a complication at birth he spent his first week of life in intensive care.
Some of the therapies we have already started using include:
-Holosync—a sound meditation program that works to synchronize both sides of the brain and develop awareness through induced alpha, beta, and delta brain-wave patterns. He uses it for an hour every night. He’s committed and the jury is still out. It takes time.
-Art therapy—He sees someone weekly who does one-on-one painting sessions aimed at self-expression rather than production. This seems to be going really well. It’s a 73-year-old man from Switzerland who has been doing this all his life. Pretty cool.
-Close attention to the daily rhythm so as to keep his system in as much equilibrium as possible.
-Spending time in nature, which is always beneficial.
Some of the potential therapies I would like to do with him when we have the resources to pay for them include:
-Cognitive Behavioral therapy (I am hoping these two will be covered by insurance)
-Continuing the art therapy
-EFT for trauma healing
-Other somatic therapies to address developmental trauma, which I am still researching.
-Tai Chi and Yoga
I am anticipating that we will hone in on “what works” over time. My plan is to open a separate bank account for Eliot’s treatments and use it over the coming year to pay for expenses as they arise.
My fundraising goal is to raise $8000 for that account by the end of the year. My goal for Eliot is to find the combination of approaches that will support him enough so that he can become much less reactive and more resilient in the face of the inevitable stresses of life.
If he can get through days, weeks, or even months, without emotional outbursts like the ones I described above, I will know we have succeeded, in the most basic way. If he is actually able to begin to thrive--finding joy, satisfaction, and success in his life, I will say we have been granted a miracle.
I plan to post updates over time to let you all know what is working and how its going. I am hoping for this fundraiser platform to also be a vehicle for surrounding Eliot with love and the intention of healing/wholeness and vital well-being, and that you may all keep him in your consciousness as we move forward with our efforts. My hope is that you will be celebrating with us along the way.
Thank you for supporting, participating, encouraging and being in our lives. I very much appreciate your presence in our lives and your contributions. Emails with well-wishes are very welcome! Questions are welcome, too. As well as requests for the CD.
- Nancy Beach
- hugh hammond
- Terryt Rubin
- Daisy Barquist
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