This table represents the estimated costs in CAD for what is needed for my specific situation. I hope the costs will end up being much less, so I set my goal at a conservative $4000. Story to follow below.

I spent nearly four months in Ukraine volunteering with humanitarian organizations, helping coordinate assistance for people living through a war. I knew there were risks involved in going there. I accepted those risks because the work mattered to me as someone raised by a Ukrainian mother, and because there were people I wanted to help. What I didn’t expect was to return home seriously ill.

In August, while travelling out of Ukraine on a train, I was bitten repeatedly by mosquitoes. Within about 10 days, I began experiencing symptoms of an illness that has since turned my life upside down.

At first, I thought I was simply exhausted. Four months in a country at war will do that to a person. I assumed that once I was home, sleeping in my own bed and returning to a normal routine, I would start feeling like myself again. Instead, things kept getting worse.

What began as overwhelming fatigue and neurological symptoms gradually developed into a much more complicated and frightening collection of health problems. I started experiencing unexplained bruising and bleeding, with blood tests revealing abnormalities in my clotting function. I developed unusual skin changes, including rashes, small red and purple spots, and areas of discolouration that I couldn’t explain.

Then came problems affecting my senses. I developed painful inflammation in my left eye, accompanied by visual disturbances and sensitivity to light. I also began experiencing auditory problems affecting my left ear, adding another layer of concern about what might be happening and if this is affecting me neurologically.

Above picture: my left ear canal becoming problematic, irritated, and slightly deafened without reason.

More recently, I’ve noticed changes in my cardiac patterns, which have raised additional questions about whether the illness may be affecting other systems in my body.

Above pictures: a regular eye infection doesn’t explain the discrepancy in pupil size. After a full course of antibiotics (oral and drops) and an antiviral, ophthalmologists at University of Montreal still found damage to my left macula.

The symptoms have not followed a predictable course. Some improve, others appear, and occasionally something entirely new develops just as I begin to think I might be recovering. It’s difficult to describe how unsettling it is to feel as though your body keeps finding new ways to malfunction.

Above pictures: one morning, I woke up with my entire body covered in what looked like an allergic reaction, but nothing I consumed or was around the day prior (or during the night) was anything I have a documented allergy to. The doctor that took me for an emergency appointment said it wasn’t an allergic reaction.

Doctors suspect that the viral infection has triggered a secondary autoimmune response, but despite weeks of appointments, extensive bloodwork, and treatment with immunosuppressants and antivirals, I still don’t have a definitive diagnosis explaining the full picture. I’ve been told that according to my lab results, West Nile is most likely, but where there is war with foreign volunteers, there are diseases from all over the world, and testing is extremely extensive.

There is something particularly frightening about watching your body change and not knowing why.

Above pictures: a few of many unexplained bruises, bruising from putting my hand in my pocket.

I went from being someone who could organize humanitarian operations, coordinate volunteers, solve problems, and navigate unfamiliar places to someone who sometimes struggles to get through ordinary daily tasks, especially ones requiring sharp eyesight.

I had plans to return to Ukraine on October 14. There were people I wanted to see again, people I wanted to hug, and work I had promised myself I would finish. Having to accept that I wasn’t healthy enough to go back has been heartbreaking.

I miss feeling useful. I miss having the energy to do things without having to think about whether I’ll be physically capable of doing them. More than anything, I miss the feeling of being in control of my own life. The hardest part is that I still need more tests to figure out the best course of treatment.

Why I Need Financial Help

I’m an American citizen currently staying in Canada, where I do not qualify for provincial healthcare coverage.

There’s a common misconception that being in Canada means you automatically have access to publicly funded healthcare. Unfortunately, that isn’t how the system works.

Provincial healthcare coverage depends on meeting specific residency and eligibility requirements. Simply being physically present in Canada does not entitle someone to coverage.

As an American citizen without provincial coverage, I am responsible for paying for all of my medical care myself.

I’ve explored private insurance options, but obtaining coverage while already experiencing an undiagnosed medical condition has proven to be extremely difficult. Pre-existing condition exclusions and eligibility restrictions mean that purchasing insurance is not necessarily a solution for the investigations and treatment I need right now. That leaves me in an incredibly difficult position.

I need medical care to understand what’s happening to my body, but accessing that care comes with substantial expenses that I’m increasingly unable to manage.

Every additional test, specialist consultation, or imaging appointment brings another financial decision. When you’re already frightened about your health, having to calculate whether you can afford to investigate a new symptom adds an entirely different kind of stress.

My medical needs now extend beyond investigating a possible infection. I need further evaluation of neurological and visual disturbances, changes affecting my hearing and left ear, unusual skin manifestations, abnormal clotting results, and changes in cardiac patterns.

This involved consultations with infectious disease specialists, neurologists, dermatologists ophthalmologists, cardiologists, and other physicians, alongside specialized laboratory testing and diagnostic imaging.

The illness has also affected my ability to work, making it harder to cover these expenses at precisely the time I need medical care most.

I’m caught between needing answers and trying to afford the process of getting them.

Why Asking for Help Is Difficult

I’ve spent a significant part of my adult life trying to be the person other people can rely on. I grew up very blessed, and in 2023, my family faced very unexpected financial hardship.

Whether helping meant coordinating humanitarian assistance, financial assistance, supporting volunteers, or finding solutions when something went wrong, I’ve always found it easier to help someone else than to admit that I need help myself.

There’s a strange kind of helplessness that comes with being sick for months without knowing when, or even if, things will return to normal.

I can’t organize my way out of this. I can’t work harder to make the symptoms disappear. I can’t solve the problem simply by being determined enough.

I’ve had to accept that there are limits to what I can do on my own.

Asking friends, family, and strangers for financial assistance is uncomfortable, but continuing to postpone medical investigations because of their cost isn’t sustainable either.

I’m not asking anyone to fund a lifestyle or an adventure. I’m asking for help accessing medical care so I can understand what’s happening to my body and hopefully recover.

Where Your Donations Will Go

All funds raised will be used towards medical expenses, including:

Because I still don’t have a definitive diagnosis, I cannot predict exactly what further testing or treatment will be necessary. My immediate priority is to complete the investigations already recommended and establish an appropriate plan for my care.

What I Hope to Get Back

I don’t regret going to Ukraine and would return tomorrow if it was possible and able to be done responsibly.

I met extraordinary people, witnessed incredible resilience, and had the privilege of contributing to work I genuinely believe in. I never imagined that after everything I experienced there, I would return to North America and find myself struggling with an illness that has affected nearly every part of my daily life.

I had plans and still have plans. There are people in Ukraine I want to see again, people I want to hug, and work I want to finish. There are things I want to accomplish that have nothing to do with Ukraine, too.

Right now, so much of my life feels like it’s on hold while I wait for medical answers. I have a lot of grief, and it’s very hard to admit that.

I want to wake up in the morning and feel capable of doing the things I used to take for granted. I want to work without worrying that my body won’t cooperate. I want to make plans without wondering whether I’ll be healthy enough to follow through. I hope to stop being afraid of what the next medical appointment might reveal.

There’s absurdity in spending months in a country at war, worrying about missiles and drones, only to have your health derailed (pun intended) by what was most likely a mosquito bite on a train. I’d find it funnier if the medical bills weren’t mine.

More than anything, I just want the opportunity to get better and stop complaining.

If you’re able to donate, even a small contribution will help me access the investigations and treatment I need. If you’re unable to contribute financially, sharing this fundraiser would mean just as much.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story, for caring about what happens next, and for helping me get closer to some answers.

I hope that one day I’ll be able to look back on this as a particularly ridiculous chapter of my life, rather than the chapter that changed everything.