Fund Chris's Healing Journey Through Music - Meshuggah Live

Hi, I’m Chris. I moved to Orlando from my birthplace and hometown of Los Angeles in late 2022, and I’m committed to staying in Florida for good—to pursue healing through plant medicine, shadow/depth work, and integration into the beautiful local spiritual community.

Because of C-PTSD, OCD, neurodivergence, and debilitating chronic striatal dopamine dysfunction (akathisia)—caused both by a chemical lobotomy I was poisoned with at thirteen years old and by pharmaceuticals I stopped taking three years ago—I’m rarely able to attend events. I haven’t been to a movie, concert (edit: actually, I did attend one over a year ago), theme park, date, hike, or game night in years—except for the occasional short visit with one of my two friendly neighbors. Depression has been a huge part of my struggle.

That’s why it would mean the world to me to attend a show by my favorite band, Meshuggah, for what would be the sixth time. They’re playing in Tampa (about two hours away), but I don’t drive and often get agoraphobic being far from home for too long.

I had to miss my last chance to see them in 2022—even though they were performing right in Hollywood, part of my home city, on my 28th birthday in October. That Friday show fell on the exact date of my first-ever ayahuasca ceremony at Soul Quest. They even played in Orlando just days after the weekend, on the next Wednesday, but I didn’t have a place to stay for the additional nights and had to fly back instead of catching the Wednesday show. In hindsight, I really wish I had found a way to stay and see them.

Meshuggah is an older, legendary progressive metal band from Sweden that only tours every few years—and they likely won’t be performing for much longer. I’m a diehard fan and dream of being in a Meshuggah tribute band someday. My cousin and his roommate even used to call me “Meshuggah” as a nickname.

Unfortunately, GA (general admission) floor ticket prices skyrocketed after I wasn’t able to afford one when they first went on sale a few weeks ago. Thankfully, after posting my story on Reddit, someone reached out offering to sell me one a bit cheaper. I’m hoping that still works out.

Would you please consider supporting me with funds for:

• A GA floor ticket for Meshuggah in Tampa on April 19th

• Round-trip Uber/Lyft from Orlando to Tampa

Alternatively, I’m going to try to save money by offering my one local friend a balcony ticket plus gas money, in case he’s willing and able to drive. He may be too busy with work or simply not interested enough (he’s not as heavily into metal as I), but I’m hopeful.

This experience would mean so, so much to me. Thank you deeply for reading. I’ve been working hard on my health in the hopes of eventually earning some supplemental income alongside my disability aid, but my condition continues to be too severe. Even a small contribution would help make this dream possible.

https://youtu.be/WP3ujavvTAc

Edit: I’m also now realizing that this will be the perfect belated birthday celebration for my big 30 last October, which I still haven’t celebrated.