“Go out in the woods, go out. If you don't go out in the woods nothing will ever happen and your life will never begin.” - Clarissa Pinkola Estés

Dear Community,

I'm preparing myself to step humbly into the care of these ancient mountains for a 10-day Vision Quest. For three of those days and nights, I’ll be fasting in the woods, without human contact, facing the central fears, questions, and prayers of my heart. This time will allow me integrate some essential ingredients of alchemical change into my personal and professional healing work.

Growing up with complex trauma, I learned to rely on myself for the support that only others can provide and to look to others for the worth I can only give myself. This backwards logic—which also runs rampant in our cultural narrative—lends more vulnerability to my request, but it adds potency to my prayers: I see myself moving across this threshold with the warmth of many strong and loving hands at my back—

May our connections anchor me as I cross over to a place of deep listening.

May our connections steady me as I stand in profound aloneness.

May I find good medicine to teach me how to live my life in service.

I’m currently in a graduate counseling program, focusing on expressive arts therapy and systemic multicultural issues in counseling. Facing many of the deep and central issues of my life in school has showed me that a full emergence as the counselor and human I wish to be will require a more embodied initiation. 

This vision quest is a necessary step on my path to stewarding others as they find integrity in their lives, heal from trauma, and boldly wrestle with the fears and questions of their soul. After this experience, I'll better understand the perils and benefits of an initatory experience.  Simply put: without this initiation, my professional training will be incomplete. 

I’m asking for your help as I gather the material and loving support I need to stand in the wilderness of my own psyche. As I'm without sufficient financial resources to cover the cost and preparations for this healing ceremony, I’m grateful for anything you’re moved to share.

Here are my fundraising goals:

Goal #1: $2,500 

This is the bare minimum that will make it possible for me to attend the vision quest and not lose my $500 deposit. It covers:
• The tuition and costs of attending vision quest with the Rites of Passage Council, led by Kedar Brown . 
• The cost of camping on private land and being fed home-cooked goodness for all the days we are not fasting.
• The necessary compensation for skilled facilitators to hold a strong and steady container around our healing work.

Goal #2: $3,000

After my initial goal, I'd like to raise another $500 to cover the income lost from taking two weeks off of work. 

Goal #3: $3,370

My final goal would allow me to prepare my body for deep change and bring good gear with me up the mountain: 

• $180 for 2 sessions of healing body work
• $60 for water-proof gear
• $100 for water proof hiking boots
• $30 for a folding knife


These are some prayers I'll be carrying with me up the mountain:

I pray for healing to rise from the belly of the earth into the bellies of my fellow humans that we may all feel the earth's support, find more ease in embodiment, and remember what it means to belong in relationship to our living landscape. 

I pray for my family  that we may reclaim our dignity,  disentangle ourselves from the sticky web of ancestral abuse and neglect, and breathe new vitality into our bodies, our art, and our connections. 

I pray for grief to move along its native current and carry so many stagnant mourners back to their source.

I pray for a good death to come to all the parts of me still snagged on fear—may I steward my own soul through the important cycles of creation.

I pray for my voice to be the medium of my power.

I pray for power to become fluid again and flow back to those beings long-oppressed, brutally wounded, and ultimately unseen by dominant Western culture.

If there are prayers you’d like me to take with me on the mountain, please send them my way!