Hi all, my name is Jaret Poff.

It’s been a long bumpy 4 1/2 years.

I never expected to be here and resort to a GoFundMe experience.

I have really been holding out, and holding on for dear life.

Some people may not understand what it’s like not able to walk during my last year of employment. But with no family doctor I was able to push my limit yet again with utmost determination to try to make it until my surgery but couldn’t.

Thanks to the help of self medicating using pain medication and alcohol, that made some things possible, but I was fighting a lost cause, with dragons to slay later(I’ll get into that part).

I was born with the “mother of all Clubfoot “

as one nurse explained to my first specialist at St.Michael’s in Toronto.

And yes, my first surgery was at 3 months old on both feet, casts up to the diaper.

then a second surgery on the left at 3 years old.

I used to sleep with the lace up shoes with the bar across the bottom and the red knobs to crank the toes outward to correct the feet.

I remember crawling down the stairs backwards for cartoons not knowing how to unlace shoes yet.

WELL,

in high school, my talents were between welding, or art.

At that point I heard “artists don’t make good money until they’re dead”

so I chose welding (1997) Conestoga Guelph.

after 3 years bouncing around production welding I went back to the drawing board to take welding to the extreme and went to school for Commercial Diver (welding underwater) at CWDI Canadian Working Divers Institute.

Did that for 7 years.

Even worked in the Caribbean for a while.

(No little green book of safety down there)

Best rate of pay after 7 years experience and certified $23/hr. Working 6 months of the year max.

Boilermakers were offering $21/hr as a first year apprentice, and journeyman in 5 years at $48/hr, full benefits and a pension,

it was a no brainer.

Come ahead to my last few contracts with the Boilermakers 128 (15 year member), I was falling apart but knew I still required an income.

I had to switch surgeons to one closer to home (Ottawa), and I knew my wait for surgery was a long way off yet.

I was taking sleeping pills to get to sleep through the pain, problem is I was sleeping through my morning alarms (yes multiple).

And the booze too, which was now starting to grab a hold of me and bite down which I recognized and was trying to correct on my own but couldn’t.

I recall being told to keep coming in to work, well look after you.

Despite what I was told, secretly behind the scenes those people above those saying I would be looked after were slating me to be fired because of my timekeeping.

They thought I needed help with the booze, but really I needed help with actual physical pain. And I still needed a family doctor (mine retired).

So I quit before they fired me.

Probably not the best choice, but when you’re going through it you don’t need to be hauled into the office for a meeting every day to defend your position.

I let them win. But I was running out of drive.

SO…,

December 18 2021 was my last working day as a Boilermaker and I am Proud and hopeful that I can return.

since December 2021 I went through the process to get on my Unions LTD. They are very helpful, and I am eternally grateful!!!

If it wasn’t for the Union I would have $0.

But alas, I am still below the poverty line, at

$28,000 before taxes, and before benefits (around $250/mo.)(And this figure remains current.)

That leaves me about the same as E.I. Per month to live on.

I was used to an income of about $120K/yr.

and I did save a bit in prep for time off for surgery but not near enough.

I still had years to wait on the waiting list.

With guidance I submitted my paperwork for CPP-D (Canadian Disability) right away.

But I could only submit my portion, as the other part is to be filled out by a doctor.

Still no family doctor. So I went to the ER and clinics asking every doctor to fill it out.

They said “go to your family doctor “

I said what if you don’t have one?

They all say “sorry”

what good is that going to do?

”sorry”

just ready to snap.

So I started focusing on the things I needed to work on.

Drinking.

Now with all this time and stress on my hands, and not working anymore. I was starting to drink more.

Just getting up in the morning required 4 Twisted Tea tall cans and a couple sips of vodka just to take the shakes away and lower the heart rate. I could stop myself for 4 days on my own. On day 4 I was making up for lost time. Feeling I couldn’t make it anymore I found myself plotting suicide a couple times.

I had enough and booked myself into DeNovo (Rehab). And I’ve been 1016 days sober today. I don’t miss it. I wanted it bad.

So…, now I’m sober, and still broke.

It’s been 4 1/2 years Not paying Peter to pay Paul, and vice versa.

realistically at least $500/mo short just for bills. It’s like a slow death.

Dad, who has been helping me by using his pension has suffered a major stroke putting him in a wheelchair and unable to walk, now needs full time care and can’t help me anymore. (Not to mention the guilt of using your dad’s pension in hopes that the government starts paying me back)

But still no doctor, and forms incomplete.

Finally a family doctor.

Forms filled and sent.

Denied.

(try again)

Request for Reconsideration

Denied.

Now I am at the appeal stage of CPP-D,

4 1/2 years later still not a dime from them.

still fading financially.

Seems like our country treats our disabled like our war veterans.

and I just keep getting denied.

Hopeful but doubtful.

so I’m reaching out to you for help.

I really don’t know what’s suitable to ask for,

if you can help me out with $10 or $20 thank you !

and if you can’t , then god bless,

I understand.

I will stretch your donation like I have been for the last 4+ years.

Also,

Surgery.,

it’s been a year recovering from the first surgery.

I can walk around the house or the yard for about an hour, but then I can’t do anything the next day. Laid up because of pain.

Some of the bone fusion didn’t take, so gotta go back in, bone graft, and hope again. Fingers crossed.

Looks like roughly another year recovery after my next surgery.

And hopefully I can do better than an hour on said foot.

Honestly, my foot has been giving me so much grief over the years that at my first consultation I asked them to just cut it off.

And even though I have one of our countries best Orthopedic Surgeons, if it doesn’t work out, I’d like to keep it in a jar on the mantle.

Sounds Grim but it’s real.

I didn’t know in order to go through surgery that a pre-requisite was poverty.

That is also real.

The funds that are donated will go towards saving my home from going into a forced sale scenario, which after would put me below zero in the sale.

And it would help me pay my gas bill for heat. Soon need to resort to using the cooking stove.

And my car is in real need of service in order to make it to my appointments.

Also need a wood stove, mine is cracked.

and it was a cold winter just running on gas heat. Not doing that again.

Thing is, I may have been able to tinker around before and get some shit done.

but with the foot I cannot, and have to pay someone else to do the work.

as I stated before.

If you can help me out with $10 or $20

I thank you in advance.

And if you can’t

God Bless.

Every morning I wake.

and say

I’m a driver, I’m winner,

Things are going to change,

I can feel it. (Cake)

Thank you for your time and thoughts

Sincerely,

Jaret Poff