- J
My name is Jan Knott. I have been married to my wonderful husband Steve for 32 years and we have three beautiful children, all adopted from South Korea. Our rich family life is a precious gift to me. I was six years old when my mom passed away at age 45. Knowing how deeply I was impacted by this loss, I wanted nothing more than to be a mom to my kids. Then, in December 2007, at age 45, I was diagnosed with stage 3 rectal cancer. Having no family history and no symptoms, it came as quite a shock. The concern that my children may have to endure the loss of their mom, as I had, left me distraught during the difficulty that followed my diagnosis:
• 2008: Chemotherapy & radiation.
• 2009: Cancer-free-elation turns to radiation-damage realities -- revolving-door hospital stays. My quality of life was gone. The life-saving measures used to eradicate the cancer ultimately took more than the cancer itself.
• 2010 and 2011: When I wasn't in the hospital I was confined to home for fear of “leakages” from the appliances that people with ostomies and stomas live with every day.
• December 2012: More big changes, not for the better. Radiation (called the gift that keeps on giving) began to affect other organs, In what was to become a 40-day hospital stay, major surgeries to remove damaged organs also resulted in the permanent need for an ileostomy bag and urostomy bag, without the possibility of reversal.
• 2013 and 2014: Continued bowel obstructions and six surgeries to date, amounting to around 300 days in the hospital, only to hear the dreaded words of my surgeon saying he was unable to do anything else for me. But then…
• 2015: HOPE!!!!! Acceptance into the UCLA (Ronald Reagan Center) Transplant Program and approval by insurance for the transplant of a new small bowel, liver and pancreas!
Since 2014 I have not been able to eat anything by mouth. I am fed through a central line in my chest 12 hours at a time. TPN (Total Parenteral Nutrition) sustains me but it damages my liver and is shortening my life span. I cannot stay on it indefinitely. The only good news in this is that it makes me a candidate for transplant.
I am daring to hope again that through a transplant I will be relieved of the need for TPN and return to a measure of the quality of life I once enjoyed, to appreciate the normal things of life with my family -- sitting around the table with my husband and children enjoying a meal together! The ups and downs of 8 years of medical treatment have taken its toll on my family and me. The new possibility of living with a sense of normalcy has definitely raised my hopes!!!
I have gained, in a way that only trials can produce, a depth of experience, character and faith. I will take that forward with me. Lord willing, through transplant, I will also participate again in the things my family used to enjoy together -- camping, bike riding, boating and playing sports. I look forward to once again attending church together. My faith in God sustains me but I want to be active and present in the community of believers. I want to walk out of isolation and back into life! I look forward to enjoying art fairs and trips up north or to Chicago with my girlfriends. I look forward to walking the trails with my two chocolate labs, Lexie and Bella. I look forward to working again, finding pride and purpose in my daily activities and interactions with co-workers and customers. I miss all of these things so much. I long to regain the very parts of ME I had to leave behind. If this transplant gives back even a part of that I will be so grateful!
The transplant requires 2-3 months in the UCLA hospital and 4 months in the Los Angeles vicinity afterward for follow-up care in their clinic before I’m able to return home to my family. I am responsible to rent a furnished apartment, find caregivers, and pay for flights and transportation to and from the airport along with basic living expenses. I am asking for your help to cover those expenses so that I may pursue life again. Thank you.
• 2008: Chemotherapy & radiation.
• 2009: Cancer-free-elation turns to radiation-damage realities -- revolving-door hospital stays. My quality of life was gone. The life-saving measures used to eradicate the cancer ultimately took more than the cancer itself.
• 2010 and 2011: When I wasn't in the hospital I was confined to home for fear of “leakages” from the appliances that people with ostomies and stomas live with every day.
• December 2012: More big changes, not for the better. Radiation (called the gift that keeps on giving) began to affect other organs, In what was to become a 40-day hospital stay, major surgeries to remove damaged organs also resulted in the permanent need for an ileostomy bag and urostomy bag, without the possibility of reversal.
• 2013 and 2014: Continued bowel obstructions and six surgeries to date, amounting to around 300 days in the hospital, only to hear the dreaded words of my surgeon saying he was unable to do anything else for me. But then…
• 2015: HOPE!!!!! Acceptance into the UCLA (Ronald Reagan Center) Transplant Program and approval by insurance for the transplant of a new small bowel, liver and pancreas!
Since 2014 I have not been able to eat anything by mouth. I am fed through a central line in my chest 12 hours at a time. TPN (Total Parenteral Nutrition) sustains me but it damages my liver and is shortening my life span. I cannot stay on it indefinitely. The only good news in this is that it makes me a candidate for transplant.
I am daring to hope again that through a transplant I will be relieved of the need for TPN and return to a measure of the quality of life I once enjoyed, to appreciate the normal things of life with my family -- sitting around the table with my husband and children enjoying a meal together! The ups and downs of 8 years of medical treatment have taken its toll on my family and me. The new possibility of living with a sense of normalcy has definitely raised my hopes!!!
I have gained, in a way that only trials can produce, a depth of experience, character and faith. I will take that forward with me. Lord willing, through transplant, I will also participate again in the things my family used to enjoy together -- camping, bike riding, boating and playing sports. I look forward to once again attending church together. My faith in God sustains me but I want to be active and present in the community of believers. I want to walk out of isolation and back into life! I look forward to enjoying art fairs and trips up north or to Chicago with my girlfriends. I look forward to walking the trails with my two chocolate labs, Lexie and Bella. I look forward to working again, finding pride and purpose in my daily activities and interactions with co-workers and customers. I miss all of these things so much. I long to regain the very parts of ME I had to leave behind. If this transplant gives back even a part of that I will be so grateful!
The transplant requires 2-3 months in the UCLA hospital and 4 months in the Los Angeles vicinity afterward for follow-up care in their clinic before I’m able to return home to my family. I am responsible to rent a furnished apartment, find caregivers, and pay for flights and transportation to and from the airport along with basic living expenses. I am asking for your help to cover those expenses so that I may pursue life again. Thank you.