Aloha mai kākou,
I am Kahelelani (Kahele) aka HEAVY PLEASURE. A 39 y.o mixed-Native Hawaiian, gender non-conforming, māhū / trans artist who is currently seeking support from my loved ones, the various communities I’m invested in, and from our extended networks in helping me raise money to fund my gender-affirming top surgery, and my move back to my ancestral lands.
Settler colonialism directly impacts me as a Hawaiian and as a trans person - be it through the historical and continued genocide of my people, the violence directed at māhū (trans person) within the settler colonial project, fatphobic BMI restrictions that allow for my insurance company to deny me surgery, and land dispossession throughout our islands.
Hawai’i has become an almost impossible for Natives to thrive. Next to the U.S military, settlers (any non-Hawaiian), complicit or not, now own the majority of Hawaiian lands. More currently, we have wealthy people from the continent making land grabs which are driving the cost of living up rapidly. These factors create a major barrier for me and all Hawaiians to be able to exist in our places.
I’m currently taking specific action to interrupt this violent system. In January, I returned to school after a 20 year hiatus and am now working towards a degree in Hawaiian Studies. This work is opening up so much within me. Rage, expansive love, responsibility, and a more defined purpose are propelling me into this next big stage of life. I am now being called home to focus my energy on the land and people from which I belong to. I am also seeking gender affirming surgery. Acquiring the education I deserve (remembering//learning our nearly extinct language, histories, stories), returning to my land, and self determining my experience in my trans body are all acts of ea (sovereignty), and inherently disrupt the settler colonial project.
Here’s a breakdown of why I chose the amount that I did …
- 12k for surgery
- 4k for recovery costs including : hotel stay for a week / food for myself and caregiver / travel expenses to and from Miami for myself and caregiver
- 3k unforeseen recovery costs due to complications in healing
- 3k for shipping some important belongings to Hawai’i
- 5k to fix my truck, drive it across the country, and ship it to Hawai’i
- 5k to build a small home on the land my sister and ‘ohana malama
I mahalo you for taking the time to read this, and for helping uplift my needs in the ways you are able (donating, sharing, praying).