My name is Josh, and I’m facing a spinal fusion surgery that I can’t postpone any longer. The pain, nerve issues, and mobility problems have reached a point where I can’t function normally, and without this surgery, things will only get worse. I’ve worked my whole life, mostly in commercial kitchens, but my spine simply can’t handle that world anymore — the lifting, twisting, rushing, and long hours are physically impossible for me now.

I’ve been trying to hold everything together on my own, but between the medical appointments, the symptoms, the loss of income, and the long wait for SSDI, I’ve hit a point where I need help. I don’t have family support to fall back on, and I’m doing everything I can to stay stable, sober, and prepared for what’s coming. Asking for help isn’t easy, but I’m out of options.

This surgery is necessary, but it also means weeks of recovery where I won’t be able to work at all. Even after recovery, I won’t be able to return to commercial cooking. That chapter of my life is over, and accepting that has been one of the hardest parts of this whole process.

What I’m Working Toward After Surgery

I want to be really clear: I’m not asking for help because I expect the world to take care of me forever. I’m asking for help so I can get through this surgery and actually rebuild a life that fits the body I’m going to have afterward.

Since I won’t be able to go back to kitchen work, I’ve been thinking a lot about what comes next — something meaningful, something I can physically handle, and something that uses the parts of me that are still strong.

And honestly, the answer has been right in front of me: my cats, Hari and Houdini.

They’ve been a huge part of how I’ve stayed sober these last 17 months. They’ve given me routine, purpose, comfort, and a kind of emotional grounding that’s hard to explain unless you’ve lived it. I’ve spent a lot of time researching and reflecting on how many people in recovery could benefit from that same bond — especially people who understand cats the way I do.

So once I’m healed, I want to start a small foster‑based project that pairs kittens with people in recovery who are emotionally ready for that responsibility. Not handing out pets randomly — but careful, one‑on‑one matching, guidance, and follow‑up. Something that helps both the cats and the people who need them.

It’s something I can do from home, at my own pace, within my physical limits. And it gives me a sense of purpose for the future instead of fear.

I’m not asking for help so I can give up. I’m asking for help so I can get through this surgery and move toward something that actually matters.

Why I Need Help Right Now

Until SSDI is approved — which can take months — I have no income. I’m trying to sell what I can, cut every corner possible, and stay afloat, but the reality is that I can’t cover:

• basic bills

• transportation to medical appointments

• pre‑surgery costs

• post‑surgery recovery needs

• rent and utilities during the weeks I’ll be unable to move normally

I’m doing everything I can to stay sober, stay stable, and stay hopeful. My cats have been my lifeline through all of this, and I’m determined to get through this surgery so I can build something meaningful afterward — something that helps others the way they’ve helped me.

If you’re able to help, even a little, it would mean more than I can put into words. And if you can’t donate, sharing this helps just as much.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, and for helping me get to the other side of this surgery so I can start rebuilding my life.