Jem's Top Surgery Fund

Update: 05/21 - Fundraiser complete! I was able to use the generous donations of the people who contributed to this page to complete my funding and I had my surgery on the 24th of March 2021 :D I can't thank you enough and I am so grateful that you helped me through this incredible chapter in my life. Peace - Jem xxx

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I'm Jem - which is short for Jeremy. (he/they.) I'm a transgender artist based in Glasgow. I am asking for donations to help me to afford to have top surgery: a procedure to surgically remove my breasts to create a more masculine chest. 

Since I was really young, I've been on a confusing journey discovering my gender identity. From being an 8 year old getting my first short haircut and telling friends I wanted to be a boy, traversing the world as a trans person was strange. Bullying at primary school from confused kids and then attending an all girl's secondary school confused my notion of who I was even more, and it took a long time to unpick my identity from the expectation of who I thought I was supposed to be. Now I'm sure of who I am, the last few years has been a painful process of accepting that the reason I have been so uncomfortable is that my body does not fit my gender at all. 

Trying to present as masculine with large, heavy boobs is really frustrating and sad. You can't hide them, they won't bind properly, nothing I do is going to minimise them enough for me to pass as male. They're heavy, they hurt me, and every time I feel them on my body I get a big wave of dysphoria that makes me want to hide away. I remember being a kid and having a more androgynous body, and how I used to run really fast, and jump and dance and feel good about myself. Ever since my body changed during puberty I've been in a battle to reconcile the person I am with the weight on my chest. 

I've been on a waitlist to be reviewed by the NHS for 3 years now, with no sign of being seen any time soon, and even once I've been assessed waiting for the NHS to give me top surgery is likely to take upwards of 7 years. This waiting time has felt like torture, and finally when the pandemic hit I realised I couldn't wait anymore and made the decision to go private. I'm now getting hormone treatment to increase my testosterone, but no amount of hormones is going to get rid of these double Gs. 

If I could get this surgery in the next year or so, it would dramatically change my life. I feel like I'm trapped inside a cocoon, waiting to emerge and finally be able to breathe. I have received a letter of approval for surgery after being assessed by a psychologist, my loving family have agreed to support me through this however they can, and now I know that the only thing standing in my way is money. To folks who are happy in their birth gender it may seem excessive or a luxury to want to change my body with surgery, but the emotional toll of feeling disconnected from your body is serious. My mental health has suffered for decades over  my body dysphoria, and while understanding why has helped me to cope, there's no amount of therapy or meditation or exercise or antidepressants that is going to take these breasts off of me. I'm ready to start living, to have a social life, to be active, to run and jump and dance again. Surgery is the only way to reach that place, and for that I need your help. 

Please consider donating to and sharing this fund, even the smallest donations are appreciated. 

Peace x 

Jem