It just never seems to end... Can you help it to stop

My name is James, my partner is Mike. Writing this is a first for me. I have always been a selfless person and this is breaking my heart. Many say we should write a book because it is so surreal. This is just a fraction of what has gone on. Here is our story...

My name is Jim Traynor. I have a partner named Mike who I met 20 years ago. When we met, we seemed to have an instant click like we had known each other forever. He was 17 and I was 32. He seemed older because of his act of maturity and wasn't in school. I would bump into him on occasion and chat. He didn't seem to hang out with anyone, so he would ask me if we could hang out together. He seemed to need a big brother, and I felt flattered.

One day he started telling me about his life, letting me in slowly and eventually got into some very personal issues. We built up a bond. Realizing later, he only had one other friend. This was concerning .

When he was six months old, he was taken from his mom and dad his dad ended up in jail and died there. He was not a good person. Mike was named after his father which was Shayne but to this day will not go by that name for that reason. Mike was put with a male care giver who ended up molesting him. There was evidence of this and his mom fought hard to prove it, but who is going to believe a month old even though their was scaring and later showing signs of trauma around other adults and children. This is all in ministry care. The government would brush it under the rug. Mikes mom finally got him back, but the damage was done. I have seen some of the paperwork ; full of blacked out lines through important information. Social workers do this to protect themselves.

By the time Mike was 12, he would be put into full ministry care. They would treat him as a liar and a wild child. He was actually dealing with multiple behavioral disorders. The ministry found him doctors to basically medicate him with dozens of prescriptions like antipsychotics ,sleeping medications, and antidepressants to keep him quiet. I was so disgusted, I eventually talked to my mom about Mike. My mom used to take care of babies from broken homes. I myself was adopted, so I could relate. We eventually ended up talking to the Ministry of Family and asked if Mike could come live with us because we had a big home and a safe environment. They came over for an inspection and approved Mike to move in with us.

I helped Mike get off most of his medications. He would learn how to cook, clean, and everything that goes in between. Of course it wasn't perfect. He was a growing teenager set back 10 years mentally. Unfortunately, Mikes paperwork got transferred to a closer ministry office. We got $500 a month twice and then they told him he could not stay with us anymore. Mike was devastated. he was turning into a polite, courteous young man and his walls were coming down. He unfortunately disappeared into the system for months. Then one day, I was shopping at the local mall. He was bumming for smokes. We were both blown away that we would cross paths once again. He and I didn't want to let go this time and wanted back to where he was comfortable. When the ministry found out that we were hanging out again and over at my moms place, they had him arrested a few times and then a social worker had him thrown in jail for 4 weeks with a no contact order against my mom and I. This was too much. Then they relocated him after he got out but Mike was stubborn. He eventually contacted me and we lived a pass in the night relationship. Thank god we did.

His whole experience through ministry care, he was raped, molested, tortured, and abused, and they couldn't let him stay with a loving family. A year later, he turned 19. There wasn't much the ministry could say or do but they sure tried for the next couple to mess with us. He moved back to my mom and my place. We helped him find a job at Starbucks ,which he loved except having to get up at 4:30am to get to work...lol. I was a full time chef at the time and worked in one of the night clubs in downtown Vancouver.

Unfortunately, my mom had a stroke a couple years later and was in and out of hospital. My siblings put the house up for sale and my mom into a home where she eventually past away. That hit me very hard. Mike and I got an apartment together. We moved a few times since then, but stuck together. we both fell in love together and love each other very much.

I ended up with stage four liver cirrhosis and into the ICU with massive blood loss. an aneurysm had popped by my liver. I was supposed to die. The doctors wanted to unplug me. Mike said no way. He sat by my bed side for months and thank god he said no. It took me a year of recovery and a lot of money to survive. My inheritance went mainly towards my recovery and for Mike to help me through it.

Then Mikes mom passed away from complications with her health. Mike took that very hard and still does because he blames himself for not being around for her. Meanwhile the doctors are telling me that I only had a few more years to live. I had to fight hard for both of us. We eventually started to get back on track and then the next complication...

Mike went to the doctors for a check up where it was discovered he had a cancer lump on one of his kidneys. He had to get an operation done that was supposed to be simple. His doctor told me that during the operation, he started to bleed out and they ended up having to remove his whole kidney. It took months for him to heal. I still had money left from my inheritance and from working so we took some time to heal. Unfortunately a year later, they had to go back in and take his gal bladder.

From then on, we started getting very healthy together but had to go on disability for the next 5 years. We would not even share a glass of wine or eat fast food. No joke. Its was a tough lesson but we pulled it off...

Three years ago, Mike had to go see another doctor. More bad news. They found 2 more lumps. One on his adrenal gland and one on his lung. These things are still on hold because of what comes next.

New Years 2023, Mike was not feeling well and got taken to the emergency where they told him he had contracted meningitis and almost died. He was treated in hospital for it and from being in the hospital, contracted C Diff which is a infection in the intestines . Six more months of treatment and finally passed it. Once again, thank GOD!

Mikes other kidney has now shut down. He also has a heart infection on one of his valves. The left side of his heart is not functioning. He got out of hospital after 6 months so they could tackle the heart infection. He now has to go to dialysis 3 to 4 days a week. He can't pee and has liquid retention so his drinking liquids is very limited to 1.5 liters a day. Everything is limited now, including what he can eat and how much. He is on a lot of medications and he is always in pain. Special diets without sodium, potassium, and phosphorus, which is next to impossible. Even protein and carbs have to be very limited. For my diet, I need lots of those thigs to keep me strong. The menu constantly changes. I sacrifice my diet for him because we can't afford to have both anymore. Its too expensive. Most of what you get at a food bank or cheaper frozen foods, we cant eat. No oranges but fruits and most veggies are about the only things and I'm sure it will be changing again.

Doctor's now have to do an emergency surgery for a pulmonary aneurysm . He twitches and loses his balance because of it. If it ruptures, he will die. The doctors keep finding one more thing! We go to multiple appointments every week on top of everything else, he still wants to go for walks and be apart of life. No days off, it's crazy. No time to rest! Unfortunately, my health is starting to take a dive. The stress is crazy and I wish it on know one! My money is gone and there is know one who wants to help. It seems to fall on deaf ears. I cant even get my car fixed to get around to all these appointments. I'm not supposed to work ,but I still do to the best of my ability selling items on Facebook and e bay when I can find the time. Its shortening my life but I'm not the one whose 35 dealing with what Mike does. Its like a Romeo and Juliet story. Who will go first. We figure we will die together. Family we have our complacent. Both sides didn't even want to go to our wedding that we had saved up for. A boat cruise so we had to cancel it. Now we just can't afford it. So we justify it by saying its only a piece of paper. It sucks.

If the doctors cared more about their patients and not about their liability, we probably wouldn't be in this mess. They won't put Mike on a transplant list because they say he is too unstable. He needs a kidney transplant and possibly a heart one too. They are being very vague and wont call and talk to me. I just don't get it and I still have faith. This is where we are at.

Mike's 35 and been through more than a dozen lifetimes. I love him soo much!! He is a fighter but losing his positive attitude.

We have battled the worst and fought back and come out smiling. We have given our shirts away even though were cold...

The money donated will be going to a better quality of life for what is left of ours, mainly his. To be able to do as others do once again. It's like a dream to be able to get back on our feet. I have faith we can do this with help. Rent, food, health products, a new bed especially for Mikey, some clothing that he can wear cause he has tubes coming out of parts of his body, and some small life aids. Id like to fix my car and get going again like everybody else. We have never seen a vacation, not like we can go on one now but the doctors say we could get away for a weekend. They sort of have to have a dialysis machine...lol.

I have been a very selfless human being in my life, polite, and courteous. I have a smile for anyone, but its becoming difficult. Something to take the pain and the strain away, just for a little while. We are 2 good people. Mike is very much into healing stones and rocks and spiritual growth. It's amazing what he knows about those things. I am a very spiritual guy and Mikey amazes me every day. Its a heart breaker though. To see what he goes through on a daily basis and not giving up. its coming though...

This is only half of what he has gone through and I want to see him conquer this too.

I thank you for your time reading this. if we pull through this chapter, we will be stronger than ever. I believe this!

I hope you will consider helping us.... THANKS, JIMBO and MIKEY.

The photos are of Mike and I. When we were healthy and when we weren't. You can follow us on Facebook at either Jim Traynor or Mike Traynor Pickard.