In all my vulnerability I ask for help!

As you all know I have lost a lot this year, grieved a lot with the passing of five of my incredibly precious sweet girls, Poppy, Flora, Billy, Bobby and Pixy. I did everything I could to give these five girls their best and most beautiful lives. And to save them, unfortunately did not succeed. I fell into a deep hole time after time after death, this hole got deeper each time. Grief is hard, mean, lonely and very painful. I often wonder why, why so much grief? Because of my tremendous love and passion to save them I did everything I could to do so. Because of my tremendous fear of losing them I did everything I could. purchased many medications, made many visits to the vet because I was close to despair. Fear took hold of me completely, especially after Poppy died the fear was well in, because of that I didn't look at my finances and if I could afford it, I had to help them no matter what. My love for my animals is so enormous this is really unprecedented. That I could not save them is therefore extra difficult for me and I blame myself. I think every time if I only had .... Then the bills came from the vet for consultations, medication and putting them to sleep. The bills I had to pay with borrowed money from people around me, which I now have to pay back with money I can't spare. It is my nature that I want to solve everything myself and certainly don't ask for help. But now I have my back against the wall and in all my vulnerability I want to ask you for help. Pixy's bill is still coming due. In total I have a debt of 450 euros. I hope with all my heart that you will help and support me. I am very grateful for everything and every little bit helps. 

Thank you so much….love Marije and her flock