Oh lord, won’t you buy me a new golden tooth?

Hello there, 

I am grateful you’ve taken the time to hear about my sad tooth. 

Due to the unforeseen and rather wild times we find ourselves in, I am no longer in full time employment and thus find myself in a rather sticky predicament. 

My tooth has been causing me excruciating pain for the past month as the little blighter needs to be ripped out. I’ve been thinking about it for a while now. The satisfaction of knowing the very tooth that causes me sleepless nights and painful bites will be yanked and I will finally be free will be a stupendous relief. 

Yanking the bugger isn’t the costly part. It’s replacing him. I really like being able to chew properly and not having unnecessary holes in my mouth, but I digress...

I need your help to replace this pesky molar of mine with a stunning golden chomper. In exchange for your glorious money, I will sing live (via the internet, Facebook and Instagram) and do my best to serenade every last one of you quarantined souls. 

So please donate and I will write a song dedicated to my new tooth and it will be titled: My New (hopefully gold) Tooth