Honoring Joseph: Help Us Say Goodbye

I never in a million years thought that I would have to plan my child's funeral. It is suppose to be the other way around. I am empty and don't know how to move forward knowing that my boy is gone. That I will never hear his voice or see his face again in this life.

Joseph passed away this morning at 4:32am and while I should be planning on our mountains trip, I have to plan a funeral. 21 years of life is all he got, and he had a rough time and had demons that he tried and tried to fight but they were to strong. But he really did try and really did try to get free of them. In the end, they took my boy away from me. I hope he knows how much I love him and how proud of him I am. He really did try this time and was doing really good. I am trying to be strong for his sisters, as we try to put my boy to rest. He had no life insurance and I am not sure where or what to do next. Who thinks they will be planning to bury there child? I never thought about something like this or what to do in this situation because I am not suppose to be planning my sons funeral. But here we are. No matter how broken I am, my job as his mom is to make sure he gets to have his life here with us celebrated and that he has a nice resting place. He deserves that. I checked around and the prices I got are outrageous. I am hoping that even if you cannot help financially that you can please share this post. I put 5000 up but whatever amount will help. I just spoke to one funeral director today and that was based off the price he gave me. Again, do not feel obligated to help or if you would like to pay straight to the funeral home that will be fine too. I don't have the funeral home yet but my family will be going out in the morning to see what options we have and which funeral home will be best to take care of my boy. Please pray for us and overall my girls. They are taking this all real hard too. It's all like a bad nightmare, but as promise to Joe, I will do my very best to make sure he gets the very best care possible. I know he's no longer in there but he deserves to be put to rest and have a celebration of the life he lived and the joy he brought to us. I will never stop fighting for him and I will take on this battle to fight those demons now that he is no longer here to do so. I will not stop. Ever. I love u bud. I will see you again soon. I know maw maws are going to take care of you so just sit back and wait .. mom will be there and we will be back together. Not a day will go by that I don't think of you so I promise your memory will never be lost. You will not be forgotten and you are loved more than you ever could imagine. Look down on us from time to time. I love u.