I’m deeply saddened and heartbroken to share with you that my father passed 4/4/2020. He was an amazing father to me and I’m deeply grateful for the joyful childhood he provided for me. He faced many struggles throughout his life, but despite it all, I never once doubted that he loved me deeply.

My father had a boyish spirit and was keenly intelligent. I know the strength, intelligence and sense of humor I’m honored to have came from him. It breaks my heart that I will never hear his laugh or play a board game with him again.

I hope that all my friends here on Facebook will cherish their families a little extra today. Tell your loved ones you are grateful to them. I’m so thankful that I was able to forgive my father for any issues we had and that every conversation I had with him ended with me telling him I loved him.

My father faced addiction, homelessness and mental illness very late in life. He died without anything to his name but the loving memory of those that remember him for who he was before he faced these challenges.

My father was the most giving man I knew with a wonderful heart. He was kind beyond measure and experienced his greatest joys taking care of others. As a nursing assistant he would purchase less harsh soap with his own money so that his residents would not have chaffed skin. When I was scared at the hospital in my late twenties he slept in the hospital with me and stole extra blankets and apple juice from the nurses station to keep me sane. Even in his worst days, sleeping under overpasses, he would show kindness to his fellow humans by sharing the meager amount he had with his fellow humans. When I was a child, I couldn’t handle spice so whenever he made tacos or fajitas, he made a separate small plate just for me. When he had his sanity, you could see this kindness and boyish smile shine for him.

Even as he lay dying in hospice his only hope was for me to be happy. “Don’t worry about me, I just want you to be happy” he would say.

I draw peace from the fact that he is at peace. And I know in hundreds of small ways this world is better for having had him in it.

Sadly, my dad died without much so I am collecting money for his funeral expenses and will donate any excess funds to a homeless shelter, if you would like to honor his memory by contributing.

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SIDE NOTE ONE HOMELESSNESS: I can’t describe the horrors of homelessness in this country. Americans sleeping in fenced in concrete pads, layered basically on top of each other. It’s horrific. Many of these humans are not looking for a handout but instead are frequently suffering from untreated mental illness.

I am so incredibly grateful my father passed peacefully, in a hospice, in a bed, indoors. I had to fight to get him into a hospice in January as they were planning to put him back on the street. The thought of him dying in the conditions I witnessed ripped me up inside. I know we are all sheltering in place and on lock down and it’s annoying and panic inducing but please take a moment to look around your house and be grateful that you aren’t on a concrete side walk, covered in bugs, but instead inside your comfortable home.

Thank you all for your love and support during this difficult time. And thank you for taking the time to read this and spread the gratitude. We all have so much to be grateful for, even at this challenging time in our history.

And thank you to my father. Dad, if you can hear me. I love you. I miss you. And I will always be your Pumpkin