Honoring Baby Tony: Support for the Cienfuegos Family

My name is Tony Cienfuegos. Our son, Tony Montana Cienfuegos, lost his life while still in my wife's belly. On November 13th, we received the horrible news that our son was gone. In disbelief, we asked for a second opinion. We then received a call from a doctor to go to the hospital. As we received the confirmation, we were devastated. We did not know that this was even something that happens. We never thought that this would happen to us, especially since we were already five months into the pregnancy. We believed that our son was as healthy as ever. His unexpected death was a surprise and considered a late miscarriage. I thought to myself, why haven't we heard of anyone talking about such a tragic experience? In that, I believe it is important to bring awareness through our experience in talking about it. To say, if you have experienced this before, we are so sorry for your loss, and we feel your pain.

As productive members in our communities, we strive to help. Healing in our own lives from a past of addiction, homelessness, and being in constant survival, we are very intentional in the support we provide. We arrived at the hospital the following day to prepare for the birth of our unalive son. How do you prepare to go into labor with the thought of not being able to take your baby home? I learned to just be present. Not knowing how to protect our son or my wife in those moments was the hardest thing I have ever experienced. When our son was born, we felt him there with us. As we loved on him with tears pouring out of us, we felt the urge to honor him by receiving him for the first and only time we will ever be in his physical presence. I held his hand, and we carried him around the room. We thanked him for being our son. We took pictures of him; he was so perfect in every way. Early the following morning, we left so discouraged and walked out to the unknown. Watching my wife hurt and hurting on my own, I have been present, and with that, we started talking about the plans we had made.

When our daughter was born, we celebrated by being together. As we embarked on a week and a half long road trip, we bonded and learned so much about our family that we planned on doing it again when baby Tony was to be born. I am not expecting to fill the void but only to be away together to grieve and celebrate the birth of our son through healthy grieving and bonding with our family. We are taking time to be away from work to grieve properly, and most importantly, together. If you want to support us in a small way or simply just by sharing, it would mean the world to be able to honor our son, Tony Montana Cienfuegos. We are hoping to create some small trinkets for our loved ones and our daughters with his ashes. We believe that he lives with us and in our hearts, but to wear a necklace or a bracelet in our son's honor would mean the world.