Cooper's Treatment Fund
Donation protected
Here is Coop's blog that helps to let you all have an insight into what she is going through.
http://www.read-betweenthe-minds.com/
Mark and I are so blessed to have the best family and friends in the world. For the past 2 years, each time we have the good fortune to see or talk to any of them, they ask what they can do to be of help to us. And what a help everyone has been: from bringing dinners over after our long weekends in Durham, taking our dogs on walks and/or staying at our home when we had to be away, to buying us airline tickets or hotel rooms at the last minute when we were in need, calling to check in, coming over to keep one or both of us company, taking Emma in when she needed a break from it all, to listening when we needed to talk...the list goes on and on and we are grateful from the bottom of our hearts for all the love and support we have received and continue to recieve as our story continues.
In September 2014, we realsied our then 13 year old daughter, Cooper, was struggling mightily with anorexia nervosa. As is the nature of the disease, once we discovered what was happening to her and she had the incredible courage to admit her struggle to us, it took a quick turn for the worse. After 3 horrifying weeks of watching her suffer Doctor's, Psychiatrist's and Therapist visits, and lots of begging and tears, we admitted her to Veritas Collaborative, a center of excellence for the treatment of eating disorders, in Durham, NC where she was a patient for 8 months. The last 2 months of her hospitalization we were required to move to Durham temporarily for the partial hospitalization portion of her treatment during which we learned how to smoothly reintegrate her back into the family and into life outside of a treatment center.
For the 6 months prior to our transplanting to Durham, we were visiting every weekend, Friday through Sunday, to participate in the family therapy and treatment that is so crucial to the betterment of adolescents with eating disorders. At the time we were leaving in Hendersonville, NC, 5 hours away form Durham. It was tough on us all. We even had to put our younger daughter, Emma, on homebound so that she could do her schooling at home due to the stress she was experiencing and the rigorous schedule of being in Durham every week. As the time grew near for us to transplant to Durham, Mark and I both made the conscious, yet very diffcult, decision to leave our jobs because we had no idea how long we would have to live in Durham or what to expect when we brought Cooper home.
That's most of the dilemma with this misunderstood disease.....you have no idea what to expect when you are someone or know someone that is struggling with it. Every case is different and every day is different. It's like riding on a rollercoaster that is terrifying and learning that the ride is not ending anytime soon. The more we learned at Veritas, the more we understood what we had to do as loving, supporting and determined parents.
Upon returning home to Hendersonville, we all learned just how difficult it was going to be for each of us .....to remain in the town that we loved so much. Mark and I could not return to work because of the care we had to give Cooper and she did not want to retrun to her school becuase of the ''stigma'' that unfortunately taunts those with an ED (Eating Disorder). After a lot of thought, we decided to move our family and lives to Wilmington, NC to give everyone, hopefully, a fresh start. We chose the coast because it's always been special to our family and Mark and I had dreamed of one day retiring at the beach or maybe one day just owning a house there. And Wilmington seemed to be a wonderful, lively community with a well established outpatient facility for eating disorders. Once we heard about Chrysalis, the decision was made.
The move happened very quickly because we wanted to get the girls enrolled in school and a bit settled before school and their new lives began. So, within a months time, we bought a house, put our home in the mountains on the market and moved to Wilmington. On July 24, 2015 we had all begun over....or we thought we had. Unfortunately the eating disorder had different plans for Cooper. Within 2 months of starting high school she relapsed and after a short stay at the New Hanover Regional Medical Center, was admitted to ERC (Eating Recovery Center) in Denver, Colorado, where she stayed for a little over 2 months. The last month of her stay there, Mark lived in the Ronald McDonald house in Denver to go through the PHP of her treatment there and I remained in Wilmington with Emma so that she could stay on school this time.
Cooper came home in December and as I am writing this on June 29, 2016, she has been at Oliver-Pyatt Center, Clementine for one week and 2 days after spending a week at UNC Ceed in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. After struggling more than ever for months on end, Cooper once again relapsed and we put her back in treatment. Like I said.... a terrifying rollercoaster.
I am writing this because if there is one thing I have learned by going through this awful situation, it's how important communication is. Open, honest and clear communication. So I am, through this page, communicating to you our appreciation to all who have supported us as well as asking for the thing that we need the most help with at this time which is financial assistance. Mark and I have found jobs but things are tight....too tight....and we, despite all efforts imaginable, do not seem to be making ends meet. Even though admitting this and asking for help is a challenge for me, I find myself feeling a bit of relief for having shared and asked.
It's organisations like gofundme that are there to help, but you just have to have the clarity and courage to ask. So, I am asking. We have no way of knowing how long Cooper will be at OPC or what will happen when she gets home this time, but what we do know is that recovery is a long and bumpy road and we are still enduring the ride.
Eating disorders are extremely complicated, dangerous and misunderstood. I personally think that's part of the reason for the 'stigma' that they seem to carry. Millions of Americans suffer from these diseases and many do not live to see recovery. This is a hard truth that I have come to grips with early on in this process. It is Mark's and my mission to do everything in our power to help Cooper recover and hopefully, one day, help others who suffer from these dreadful diseases. We know, and those who know and love us know, how much love and determination we have, but all the love in the world unfortunately cannot pay for all that goes into treating anorexia nervosa. Any help anyone sees fit to offer will be so greatly appreciated. And even if helping financially is not a possibility, thoughts, prayers and blessings are always welcome and appreciated by all of us!! And one more thing, it's become my mission to help others - anyone who will listen - understand this disease! Someone you know and love may be suffering, but until we, as a society, educate ourselves on eating disorders will not only not know what to do, but may very well just turn the other cheek because of not knowing what the signs of an eating disorder are. I am asking anyone who is willing to do a little reading or listening in an effort to better understand this disease. Eating disorders have literally become an epidemic and there is no better time than the present to face this reality. I recommend beginning by going to the NEDA (National Eating Disorder Association) website to start the education process. Much of what is written or reported on out there is not the truth about this complicated disease. ED's are mental disorders that take physical form. Hopefully Coops won't be taken from us. Thank you for taking the time to read what I have written.
Coops current treatment costs can be up to $3000 per day and we have already paid huge amounts of money for her treatment and any help you can give would be greatly appreciated.
Respectfully
Mark and Leigh Ann Mertens (proud PARENTS of Cooper and Emma Mertens).
http://www.read-betweenthe-minds.com/
Mark and I are so blessed to have the best family and friends in the world. For the past 2 years, each time we have the good fortune to see or talk to any of them, they ask what they can do to be of help to us. And what a help everyone has been: from bringing dinners over after our long weekends in Durham, taking our dogs on walks and/or staying at our home when we had to be away, to buying us airline tickets or hotel rooms at the last minute when we were in need, calling to check in, coming over to keep one or both of us company, taking Emma in when she needed a break from it all, to listening when we needed to talk...the list goes on and on and we are grateful from the bottom of our hearts for all the love and support we have received and continue to recieve as our story continues.
In September 2014, we realsied our then 13 year old daughter, Cooper, was struggling mightily with anorexia nervosa. As is the nature of the disease, once we discovered what was happening to her and she had the incredible courage to admit her struggle to us, it took a quick turn for the worse. After 3 horrifying weeks of watching her suffer Doctor's, Psychiatrist's and Therapist visits, and lots of begging and tears, we admitted her to Veritas Collaborative, a center of excellence for the treatment of eating disorders, in Durham, NC where she was a patient for 8 months. The last 2 months of her hospitalization we were required to move to Durham temporarily for the partial hospitalization portion of her treatment during which we learned how to smoothly reintegrate her back into the family and into life outside of a treatment center.
For the 6 months prior to our transplanting to Durham, we were visiting every weekend, Friday through Sunday, to participate in the family therapy and treatment that is so crucial to the betterment of adolescents with eating disorders. At the time we were leaving in Hendersonville, NC, 5 hours away form Durham. It was tough on us all. We even had to put our younger daughter, Emma, on homebound so that she could do her schooling at home due to the stress she was experiencing and the rigorous schedule of being in Durham every week. As the time grew near for us to transplant to Durham, Mark and I both made the conscious, yet very diffcult, decision to leave our jobs because we had no idea how long we would have to live in Durham or what to expect when we brought Cooper home.
That's most of the dilemma with this misunderstood disease.....you have no idea what to expect when you are someone or know someone that is struggling with it. Every case is different and every day is different. It's like riding on a rollercoaster that is terrifying and learning that the ride is not ending anytime soon. The more we learned at Veritas, the more we understood what we had to do as loving, supporting and determined parents.
Upon returning home to Hendersonville, we all learned just how difficult it was going to be for each of us .....to remain in the town that we loved so much. Mark and I could not return to work because of the care we had to give Cooper and she did not want to retrun to her school becuase of the ''stigma'' that unfortunately taunts those with an ED (Eating Disorder). After a lot of thought, we decided to move our family and lives to Wilmington, NC to give everyone, hopefully, a fresh start. We chose the coast because it's always been special to our family and Mark and I had dreamed of one day retiring at the beach or maybe one day just owning a house there. And Wilmington seemed to be a wonderful, lively community with a well established outpatient facility for eating disorders. Once we heard about Chrysalis, the decision was made.
The move happened very quickly because we wanted to get the girls enrolled in school and a bit settled before school and their new lives began. So, within a months time, we bought a house, put our home in the mountains on the market and moved to Wilmington. On July 24, 2015 we had all begun over....or we thought we had. Unfortunately the eating disorder had different plans for Cooper. Within 2 months of starting high school she relapsed and after a short stay at the New Hanover Regional Medical Center, was admitted to ERC (Eating Recovery Center) in Denver, Colorado, where she stayed for a little over 2 months. The last month of her stay there, Mark lived in the Ronald McDonald house in Denver to go through the PHP of her treatment there and I remained in Wilmington with Emma so that she could stay on school this time.
Cooper came home in December and as I am writing this on June 29, 2016, she has been at Oliver-Pyatt Center, Clementine for one week and 2 days after spending a week at UNC Ceed in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. After struggling more than ever for months on end, Cooper once again relapsed and we put her back in treatment. Like I said.... a terrifying rollercoaster.
I am writing this because if there is one thing I have learned by going through this awful situation, it's how important communication is. Open, honest and clear communication. So I am, through this page, communicating to you our appreciation to all who have supported us as well as asking for the thing that we need the most help with at this time which is financial assistance. Mark and I have found jobs but things are tight....too tight....and we, despite all efforts imaginable, do not seem to be making ends meet. Even though admitting this and asking for help is a challenge for me, I find myself feeling a bit of relief for having shared and asked.
It's organisations like gofundme that are there to help, but you just have to have the clarity and courage to ask. So, I am asking. We have no way of knowing how long Cooper will be at OPC or what will happen when she gets home this time, but what we do know is that recovery is a long and bumpy road and we are still enduring the ride.
Eating disorders are extremely complicated, dangerous and misunderstood. I personally think that's part of the reason for the 'stigma' that they seem to carry. Millions of Americans suffer from these diseases and many do not live to see recovery. This is a hard truth that I have come to grips with early on in this process. It is Mark's and my mission to do everything in our power to help Cooper recover and hopefully, one day, help others who suffer from these dreadful diseases. We know, and those who know and love us know, how much love and determination we have, but all the love in the world unfortunately cannot pay for all that goes into treating anorexia nervosa. Any help anyone sees fit to offer will be so greatly appreciated. And even if helping financially is not a possibility, thoughts, prayers and blessings are always welcome and appreciated by all of us!! And one more thing, it's become my mission to help others - anyone who will listen - understand this disease! Someone you know and love may be suffering, but until we, as a society, educate ourselves on eating disorders will not only not know what to do, but may very well just turn the other cheek because of not knowing what the signs of an eating disorder are. I am asking anyone who is willing to do a little reading or listening in an effort to better understand this disease. Eating disorders have literally become an epidemic and there is no better time than the present to face this reality. I recommend beginning by going to the NEDA (National Eating Disorder Association) website to start the education process. Much of what is written or reported on out there is not the truth about this complicated disease. ED's are mental disorders that take physical form. Hopefully Coops won't be taken from us. Thank you for taking the time to read what I have written.
Coops current treatment costs can be up to $3000 per day and we have already paid huge amounts of money for her treatment and any help you can give would be greatly appreciated.
Respectfully
Mark and Leigh Ann Mertens (proud PARENTS of Cooper and Emma Mertens).
Organizer and beneficiary
Peter Trotman
Organizer
Wilmington, NC
Mark Mertens
Beneficiary