Help me help John

On Monday, September 11th, I took John to the ER and 5150’d him for his protection.  He had been in a downward spiral since the beginning of 2017 and, as text messages of him wanting to die along with scary journal entries came to my attention, I knew I needed to get him somewhere to get him the help he so desperately needs.  He was taken to Fremont Hospital for treatment and observation against his will.  While it was incredibly painful to see him taken away, I knew he would be safer there.  

John now has an official diagnosis from the psychiatrist at Fremont Hospital of “Re-ocurring Major Depressive Disorder with SI.”  These cycles have been happening since age nine.  Each time, the bottom gets lower, the consequences more severe, and we all know without the appropriate treatment, the final, permanent consequence is a highly likely outcome.  

John has faced a lifetime of adversity; parental abandonment, child abuse, family alcoholism, personal alcoholism, and multiple cycles of suicide ideation and attempts. He has been sober for 25 years.  With his history and 30 years of a varying anti-depressant medication cocktail accompanied with many different modalities of talk therapy, the psychiatrist and a Palo Alto University/Stanford PhD are strongly recommending Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) as soon as possible.

After picking him up Friday, he has had almost daily bouts of emotional hysteria.  On Tuesday, he was triggered in a CVS and collapsed on the sidewalk outside, unable to function because of the body convulsing tears and wails of pain. He sent me an electronic SOS and I had to go pick him up.

John is the main income source for the family and cannot work.  He is a business coach, who for years has been changing the lives of CEOs.  Now he needs help to change his own life.  We need to raise money to pay the monthly bills while we are both out of work and he is going to treatment.  We will be going to Chico and on top of our monthly bills, we need to rent a place and feed the three of us for the two months of ECT treatment.

We have exhausted all of our retirement and rainy day savings building John’s coaching practice. and, for the last few months, have been living month to month. I work with adults with developmental disabilities and am only making $15/hr but cannot go to work as I have to stay with John so he does not hurt himself.  We are out of money.  Our savings is gone, our retirement accounts empty, no income coming in because John is not capable of working.  We have no idea how to pay for the requirement of everyday living or raising a 12 year old boy.


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Sue D Adams 
Sausalito, CA
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