Hi! Thank you for checking out Reilly's Go Fund Me Page. My name is Christie DeVore (White) and I am Reilly's mom. I am so excited to be writing this story about my sweet 10 year old. My hope is that you will read it and feel inspired to help Reilly reach his goal.

Since all of you don't know Reilly on a personal level, I think it's best if I start at the beginning. I must warn you though, I'm not a great story teller, so please don't expect a moving and emotional novel. My only goal here is to put into words the journey of Reilly and hopefully tell his story in a way that he would not only agree with, but be proud of. 

Reilly was born on September 25, 2006 right after lunch. I must say, I was so ready for this child to come out! I had never been so sick as I was during my pregnancy.  To give people an idea I always tell them that when I found out I was pregnant I weighed 140 lbs. When I delivered Reilly I weighed 139 lbs. I lost so much weight from being sick, I often laughed and said pregnancy was the best diet I had ever been on!


(Night Before I Delivered)

Nonetheless, I had a fairly uneventful pregnancy. I dealt with several bouts of pre-term labor where I was admitted to the hospital and given medicine to stop the contractions.  By the time I reached 39 weeks (which no one thought I would make it to) I was induced into labor. Ironic, I know. When I arrived at the hospital the morning of September 25th, 2016, I was already 3 cm dilated and 90 % effaced (I'll save you the details of what that means--look it up if you are curious). I have never been so excited and so scared in my life! I couldn't believe I was about to be a mom!

My mother and dad accommpanied me to the hospital as did my cousin's wife ( I feel I should metion here that she had given birth  days earlier..what a commitment on her part to be there for me!)
Throughout the day many friends from church came to the hospital to see how I was progressing and offer prayers. I will never forget the support and encouragement I received from others. 

The birth had a few moments of panic thrown in with his heart rate decreasing several times. But my nurses and Doctor did an amazing job of keeping me calm and comforatble and most importantly...Reilly SAFE! The nurse and Doctor will never know my appreciation for what they did and what they continue to do everyday.

(First Time I got to Hold Him)

Reilly was born weighing a little over 7 lbs and just shy of 20 inches long. He had to be aspirated as soon as he came out because he had in fact been subjected to meconium in the womb (Again, look it up).  After what seemed like an eternity, and specialists attending to Reilly, I heard his first cry. It was beautiful and I knew that I never loved any sound more in my entire life. I can't accurately put into words what I felt when I first saw him. It was like the best Christmas morning you have ever had multiplied by 100. All I wanted to do was hold him and love on him.  The nurses asked if I wanted them to take Reilly to the nursery at night so I could sleep. I declined because I could not stand the thought of being away from him.
(All you moms have done this!)

So for three days in the hospital I enjoyed Reilly being right next to me except for the times when visitors came to see him.  What I have always found interesting is that Reilly never cried for those first three days at the hospital. He seemed like he was going to be the happiest and easiest baby in the world. I was eager to get him home and into his new environment where we could both relax and enjoy our time together learning each other. I had no idea what was coming next.

After those first three days of blissful joy, things started to change. Reilly became very agitated and cried most of the time. Being a new mother, I tried everything I could think of: singing to him, rocking, walking, feeding, driving, tummy rubs, massages, baths, playing, etc...
Much of the time, nothing worked. It was like he was mad at me. I remember so many nights of not sleeping. And not just becasue he was hungry and would wake up and eat then go back to bed, but becasue he was constantly so unhappy. Thank the Good Lord for my mother, who got up with me and him each night to help. I am not sure what I would have done without her. To this day, Reilly and my mom have a very strong bond. They love each other unconditionally and I completely atrribute this to their bonding at such a young age and her nurturing spirit.

(Reilly and my Mom, a.k.a: Nani)

I was convinced that Reilly had collic. I even asked the Doctor several times if there was anything we could give him to help him sleep. She said no and that the phase would pass. I can't begin to describe how tired I was that first year. I was working, finishing up school, and being a single parent to a kid who never slept and was more often than not....crying. It was exhausting.

( Reilly and me around 6 months of age)

While other children were exploring their world around them and taking in so much new information, it seemed as though Reilly was slowly becoming more and more withdrawn. Almost as if he was experiencing "nothing"  even though life was happening around him.

Before he reached 1 year of age he had been  hospitalized 4 different times and subjected to many medicines and vaccines within a short period of time. He experienced RSV twice and pneumonia twice. It was a rough first year for sure.

(Me and Reilly at one of his many hospital stays)

(My brother and Reilly during a hospital stay)

(Me and Reilly excited to go home from the hopsital)

 Physically, he continued to grow, but parts of him seemed to be regressing. It wasn't until around the time he turned 1 that he spontaneously lost all the ability to talk. It was like he woke up one morning and was living in another world. He was distant, angry, and very withdrawn. He didn't seem to notice things around him and he didn't respond appropriately to situations. 

At this time I decided it was best to involve "Early Intervention" in Tuscaloosa. They were amazing. They started Reilly on a structured plan of occupational therapy and speech therapy through in-home visits each week. Even though this process helped so much, by 18 months of age Reilly was diagnosed with autism.  

While Autism is a spectrum disorder, meaning that it can vary in severity,  it is characterized by difficulties in social interaction, verbal and nonverbal communication and repetitive behaviors. ASD can be associated with intellectual disability, difficulties in motor coordination and attention and physical health issues such as sleep and gastrointestinal disturbances. (Autism Speaks).

I was devastated. It's so true what people say that you never imagine anything bad will happen to you or your children. And then it does. I remember receiving the official diagnosis from  Dr. Rebecca Dossett, who specializes in treating children with Autism. Reilly was sitting in the floor playing with toys when she comfirmed to me that he did in fact meet criteria to diagnose the disorder. This was after months of observing Reilly and reviewing the reports from the therapists. I begin sobbing. I began asking her how she could possibly know that at such a young age. She simply frowned and said look at Reilly right now. I looked over at him and saw him playing in his own way with some blocks. He was completely oblivious to the fact I was sobbing. He had not even looked up once. We had been talking about him, to him, and next to him for the last 30 minutes or so and he was completley unaware. (I now have come to understand that Autistic children are usually very aware, they simply don't show it in traditional ways such as eye contact). Typical children would have at least looked over and been interested in what was going on around them. Not Reilly. It was like he was in his own little world.

(Reilly not wanting to play with the other kids on his t-ball team and shutting down).

Over the next few years until he reached kindergarten, Reilly was involved in intensive therapy. He had occupational therapists, and speech therapists that came to our home each week and worked with him. Through this interaction he begin to slowly start talking again. He still recoiled into his own world frequently but he was starting to try to communicate with me through words. We spent many years using the PEX system (Picture exchange system). This is where we placed velcro stickers on everything (tv, pantry, bathroom, outside, etc) and he would use them to communicate with me about what he wanted.

It really is no wonder that people with autism have melt downs. Reilly much of the time knew what he wanted to say to me,  but he could not get it out. I am sure that was very frusturating. There were many times he would throw an absolute fit and I would have to cover him with my body in order to restrain him and keep him from hurting himself.  We lovingly referred to these as melt-downs. They were hard and unbelivingly exhausting for both of us.

After his Early Intervention was over (age 3), he went on to a special school called Brewers Porch. This school was for children with Autism and here he blossomed for two years. He was given so much specialized attention and help and I will never be able to say thank you enough to the people there who helped him.  

Since Kindergarten, Reilly has been mainstreamed in public schools. We did this because we wanted Reilly to learn about how to interact with his environment and gain social skills in a "real world setting".  He has struggled and had successes along the way. He has never been one to have straight A's, or be the first picked on the soccer team in PE, but he has managed to make it all the way through third grade in a mainstream school. He did receive specialized help through individualized IEP's.

During first grade Reilly was diagnosed with ADHD. Talk about another devastating blow to a parent. Is one diagnosis not enough? What I have come to learn, however, is that Autism and ADHD are very common co-morbidities, meaning that they often go together. This started us down the path of medication to help control some of his tendencies. Any parent with a child who suffers from ADHD or ADD knows the frusturation that comes along with trying to find the right medicine.  It can be a long and painful journey until you find the choice of meds that don't completely take away the child you love. It's a balancing act of what his body can handle and what allows him to be able to pay attention so he can learn at school. There have been many tears through this process. Reilly, now 10, still takes medicine to this day and we still are trying new types in hopes of finding the perfect one.  His inability to focus and pay attention can be debilitating for him. The medicines do help but it comes with side effects all its own. One of the major areas we have to watch him in his weight. While on these medicines Reilly's weight will just bottom out. He won't eat and he looks like a twig. The pediatrician and I monitor this closely and also stick to a plan of no meds on weekends so he can just binge on food..which he does!

After third grade this past year, my husband and I decided to put Reilly back into a specilaized school for his learning differences. This occured after he came home one day with a project that he had made of himself. I am not sure how this project made it out of the school wihtout a teacher noticing it, but it did.

In  the center of the paper he had written his name and drawn a circle around it. From this circle he branched off and began writing descriptive words that he felt applied to him.  This was done on both sides of the same piece of paper, each side with different words. The words he included are heartbreaking: brat, worried, scared, mean, pain, weird, dishonest, helpless, poor, evil,etc. To this day I still tear up thinking about that.



(These are the pictures that he brought home from school)

Of course, I immediatley contacted the school and had a conference set up. The teacher was very sorry that she had not caught this earlier. Sessions were scheduled with the school counselor where Reilly was encouraged to write a new book. In this book, he was asked to write new words about himself and then look for examples of things in his life that affirmed these new words. It was a beautiful book and I love that he was able to turn around those negative thoughts about himself, even if only for the moment.

What most don't understand about autism is that it has a high rate of depression that goes along with it. It makes sense if you think about it. Because children with autism are affected socially, they tend to have trouble "fitting in". As they get older and understand more about other people, they start to try to build relationships but often are unsuccessful because they lack the skills or ability to respond appropriately. After they keep trying and keep failing at this, it often times turns inward and they begin to internalize things about themselves that are not great and certainly not true. I would enocurage anyone reading this to look up statistics about depression and autism. That is a scary read and one that I choose to pray over fervantly.

Reilly, now in fourth grade, attends Springvalley School in Birmingham, AL. It is a school designed for children with learning differences. It has been such a huge blessing in Reilly's life. His classroom only has two people in it (counting him) and he has made great friends with the students throughout the school. He would not be happy if he knew I was sharing this next part but he has a girlfriend too! I was thrilled about this as it meant that he had been able this year to develop a relationship with someone that he feels positively about! That's huge! His teacher, Anna Levy, is also great. She takes time with him and really uses methods that allow his brain to work in the way it wants too instead of  always asking him to do things that feel uncomfortable. Because of this, his grades have soared! He came home with his first two report cards of the year and they were all 100's!!! I was shocked! He was too! We just could not be happier!

As with all things in life, nothing is ever perfect. While Reilly has made great strides at his school in his new environment, he still struggles in areas. It's not uncommon on a weekly basis that I receive a phone call from his teacher because Reilly has shut down or refuses to do his work. The last time this happened we were informed that if Reilly continues to shut down and not speak or communicate with his teachers about what is wrong, he will be asked to leave Springvalley. This is simply because they are not equipped to deal with that type of behavior. I can understand this, although it scares me. Our family has made huge sacrifices to get Reilly into this school and we want him to continue there. Every morning we travel an hour to get him to this school and every afternoon we do the same to get him home. The financial sacrifice has been impactful too as it is a private school.

I am always researching things to do for Reilly that will help him and not long ago I came across service dogs for children with autism. I begin to research this and became very hopeful that this could be the route we need to take for Reilly. I quickly felt defeated though when I learned of their cost. Its common for a service dog to cost anywhere from $14-25,000. This is because of the amount of time that is spent training these dogs. They are truly amazing and I am in awe of the things they can do to help their owners have a better quality of life. These are just some of the benefits:

" the dogs provide a “calming presence” that  “can minimize and often eliminate emotional outbursts.” Some advocates believe that such dogs can provide “…. a focus through which the child can interact with other children. This helps increase the opportunity for the child to develop social and language skills.” Burrows, et al. (2008a) believe that dogs can positively influence children with autism in the areas of arousal and sensory stimulation, improving concerns in these areas. In addition, dogs can function as a “transitional object,” allowing the child with autism to first bond with the dog, an easier creature with which to do so, and this may eventually increase bonding with humans."

Also, dogs can help stop the repetitive motions that Autistic children tend to perform (i.e. hand-flapping), and encourage them to come out of shut-downs.

While researching and researching I came across a lady out of Alabama who trains service dogs. She specializes in Autism service dogs and detection dogs. I reached out to her asking if she would mind training a puppy just for obedience school as I thought this would be the best option since I would never be able to afford a true service animal. She said she would be happy too.

I started looking for a puppy that would be a good fit for obedience school and then decided I should at least ask this woman who trains the dogs if she had any that were already trained that she might be willing to sell. I was just curious. This is the email she sent me back:

Hi Christie, 

This dog I have is a special case, and dear to my heart.  His name is Whiskey and he is a red Doberman. I placed him last year with an 8 year old high functioning autistic boy. They did great together and bonded really well. Unfortunately, his child has been in and out of the hospital for majority of the year. Whiskey has been staying with me. I am confirming that they plan to sign him over. 

Whiskey is around 5 years old. I trained him after pulling him from the kill list at the shelter. Very emotionally in-tune and high level working. I would say he is one of the best I have trained. Because of his age I would sell him for $7,000. I have attached a picture for you. 

My suggestion would be we go with two possible routes for your dog selection: 

1. I can confirm that Whiskey is an option and we can see if it would be a good fit for you. 

2. You allow me to make the puppy selection for a new dog so we have a strong candidate for a service dog and we begin training as soon as possible.  

In the mean time, it would be good to meet in person and discuss in more detail. Since autism is such a variable condition, each dog is not always a good fit for each child. I have some availability on Thursday if that is suitable for your schedule.  

Best,

Sophia

(Whiskey- Isn't he beeautiful!!!!  My mom and I are wondering if we could change his name to "Whisker" haha!)

So as you can see, I was so excited to see that there may be an opportunity for him to have a service dog after all! Yesterday I met with Sophia in person and discussed Whiskey and how he may be able to help with Reilly. Reilly also came to this meeting. It went so well!

Sophia said that Reilly and Whiskey (who I will from here on out refer to as Whiskers because Sophia says that what she calls him too, like a pet name), should be able to get along fine. Whiskers is trained to stop a melt down by laying across Reillys lap. He is also trained to interfere when Reilly starts his repetitive movements and motions by applying pressure to his leg or simply nudging Reilly.

Whiskers also will be able to tell when Reilly is beginning to feel overwhelmed even before he has had a shut down. The hope is that Whiskers will respond and stop it from becoming a complete shut-down, thus minimizing his chances of not being able to continue at his school.

Whiskers also is trained to stay with Reilly while he is working. So basically, Reilly will always have a judgement free companion and a life long buddy. In addition, this will allow Reilly to have a responsibility of taking care of a dog and developing a relationship with him. Both sides of this are extremely beneficial to Reilly's emotional growth and slef confidence.

Sophia also said that Whiskers loves to help those nearby him while he is working too. She said that there will be times when Reilly is doing fine but Whiskers will notice someone else who may need a hug and will walk to give them one. This melts my heart!

Finally, Whiskers is trained to protect Reilly. He does this by putting himself in between any danger and Reilly. While I myself strive to protect Reilly each day, it's nice to know that there will be another layer of protection when I am not around.

When I asked Reilly how he felt about the prospect of getting Whiskers, he said that he is excited and hopes that he can have him. He also said it will make him feel better knowing that he will always have a friend around.

This Sunday we are meeting Whiskers at the Galleria with Sophia to start some training and see how Whiskers and Reilly connect. I will post pictures of that on Sunday. They will be working inside the Galleria together to help Reilly navigate the sometimes overwhelming stimuli that the Galleria can cause him.

I can't say thank you enough to those who took the time to read this. It warms my heart to think that people love me and my family enough to help us as we work towards making this dream a reality for Reilly. There is no amount too small to donate and we will be grateful for everything we receive.

Please help us get Reilly the help he needs and the companionship he deserves.

Reilly, Hunter and Me
Reilly, Me and Ellington
Our large but beautiful family!

Thank you!
Christie DeVore