My name is Jacob Reid and I’m in the process of doing something terrifying and exhilarating. I’m launching an online business called Sacredphrenia.
It’s the culmination of eleven years of intensive study, reflection, and self-experimentation.
Sacredphrenia is about giving a new name to a sacred illness.
It's about reviving the ancient understanding that schizophrenia is not simply a brain disorder but a profound spiritual teacher whose function is to initiate its students into a higher level of being. They need only go through the proper channels.
This goes against the prevailing cultural narrative, but I know that it is true.
I’m familiar with the alchemy of sacredphrenia because I’ve passed through its flames. I’ve been destroyed by it and transformed by it. I've experienced its devastation and, I believe, its resolution.
What I once thought was the worst thing that ever happened to me, I now consider the best thing that ever happened to me.
Eleven years ago, the summer before my senior year of high school, I started obsessing over things I couldn’t control. Something had clearly gone awry, yet no one, including myself, could quite place a finger on what it was.
Three years later, I descended into a state of unimaginable soul torture.
I found myself drowning in an inward sea consisting of demons, aliens, hell realms, and whatever other paranormal topic could produce a state of unremitting adrenaline-fueled panic. That kind of "soul fear" is worse than any earthly fear you can imagine.
I remember the day I first felt it. It was like nothing I had ever experienced. Every thought released a torrent of negative energy that rippled throughout my body.
It felt like I was being metaphysically inverted, like a hellish dimension had started seeping into mine. It felt like there was a negative vortex swirling in the pit of my stomach, draining my life force and allowing all manner of unwanted energies in.
I remember feeling utterly fucked for months on end.
The worst part is that I was prevented from praying to God by the very belief system I had imprisoned myself within. I could not think my way out of my mental prison. My critical abilities, my ability to discern truth from fiction, weakened as my brain succumbed to the effects of stress hormones raging throughout my body.
My ability to digest food disappeared. I became hypersensitive to my environment, reacting to common foods, chemicals, and electromagnetic frequencies.
My emotions flattened. I lost the ability to feel love or to be around most people. I developed a tic disorder that caused the muscles of my face to twitch uncontrollably. I had to drink large amounts of alcohol to have basic social interactions.
I remember, at my most frail, having to psych myself up just to go into a grocery store. It felt like I was going into a war zone.
Death would have been a welcome relief. But I could not kill myself, for it would have devastated my family and deprived me of the opportunity to explore the deeper meaning behind this illness, as well as the opportunity to heal and live a full life again, which somewhere deep down inside I knew was possible.
Somehow, I knew there was more to the story than I was being told by “experts in the field,” including the psychiatrist who diagnosed me with paranoid schizophrenia. Something deep inside me said this was a sickness stemming from my soul, that all I needed to do was find the right combination of teachers and practices and I would make it out of this nightmare.
This was not some meaningless neurochemical imbalance but a rare opportunity to self-actualize.
It’s why I refused to take antipsychotic medications (I’m not recommending anyone do this. Medications may have their place for certain individuals. Nothing I say is intended as a substitute for professional medical advice).
I knew that suppressing my symptoms would only prevent me from treating the underlying causes of my condition. I wanted to know what was really going on, what lay at the root of my suffering.
So, I dove headfirst into natural medicine. I spent thousands of hours studying every topic of holistic healing I could get my hands on. I tried dozens of alternative diets and healing modalities. I tested every outlandish health theory I came across, hoping it would result in even a moderate degree of transformation.
I did fasts that shrank me down to skin and bone. I did extreme cleanses that allowed me to eat nothing but rice and vegetables for months on end, nothing but fruit for months on end, nothing but meat for months on end.
Nothing was going to prevent me from healing.
I tried everything. I did daily sauna sessions and daily coffee enemas for months on end. I went on shamanic journeys. I drove hours to get raw milk in a bordering state. I zapped myself with bizarre machines and stuck medicinal suppositories up my ass.
I ate extravagant superfoods and met powerful healers in the remote desert. I took cold showers and joined a sungazing church and took ungodly amounts of supplements.
I did whatever it would take.
Lo and behold…. slowly but surely, I started feeling better.
I spent well over $100,000 trying to heal myself, most of which I financed myself working low-paying jobs that left me exhausted. One summer, I worked three jobs to pay for my expensive self-healing lifestyle.
Sacredphrenia was like a decade-long boot camp for my soul. It forced me to upgrade every aspect of my life that was out of alignment with divine order.
Not to say I’m some holy man. Far from it. I have light years to go before I’m able to levitate. Most days I barely make it to work on time.
I’ve just discovered some key things I can't hold back from sharing any longer. I’m ready to tell my story, how I made it back from hell.
I’m ready to teach others how they too can get in touch with the alchemy of their condition, using it as fuel to propel themselves to heights they never thought possible.
I’m in the process of creating a four-month coaching program to teach others what I did, what I wish I knew when I first underwent a horrific mental breakdown. I will simply be sharing the tools that helped me on my journey.
I’m raising funds because there are more costs involved with starting this business than I anticipated. I have been working well over forty hours a week for many months to save up enough money to launch this business. The truth is that I could use some financial help from others at this important time.
Funds raised from this campaign will go toward paying for a health coaching business program I am attending, the Step Into Your Power Program with Dr. Kristin Hartjes. The importance of this program in helping me evolve as a human and as an entrepreneur, cannot be overstated.
The cost of the program is $5,000. I am paying for it in segments, but could really use some assistance. To learn more about the program, you may visit the link below:
Any additional funds will go toward a legal consultation with a good attorney to make sure all my ducks are in a row legally. I do not want to violate any laws pertaining to the unauthorized practice of medicine, and I’m certain that if I use the right language and the right disclaimers, this will not be an issue.
My goal is to get the word “sacredphrenia” into the cultural lexicon. I hope you'll join me in my quest to transmute our cultural understanding of this sacred illness we stigmatize to our own detriment.
I need your help to do this. If you are compelled by my story, please donate to my cause. If you are unable to donate, please share this with someone else.
To those of you who donated to my campaign earlier this year or last year, I want to thank you again. Your funds enabled me to attend three months of the Earth Angels Program, which helped me to develop a huge amount of clarity as to what my business will be centered around.
- Janice Tan
- Kai Brock
- Fredrica King
- timothy goldsmith