This is incredibly hard for me to post, but several people encouraged me to stop trying to carry all of this quietly alone, so here we are.

I never thought I’d be making one of these again.

The last time our family faced something this serious medically was during Dave’s ICU stays. One fundraiser was created during that time by family, and later another was organized by one of Dave’s closest friends during his final ICU stay. The amount of love, support, prayers, messages, meals, laughter, and help we received during that time is something I will never forget.

Unfortunately, life has decided to throw another major medical situation at our family.

I’m currently hospitalized preparing for multiple spinal surgeries after doctors found severe spinal cord compression in my neck. The compression is significant enough that I’m considered a major fall risk right now, and something as simple as a bad fall or moving wrong could potentially leave me paralyzed from the neck down permanently.

To put it into perspective, my surgeon explained that most people normally have around 12mm of space around their spinal cord. I currently have about 4mm. They were genuinely shocked I’m not already paralyzed.

So while I’ve made a lot of jokes the last few days to cope, this is very serious and honestly terrifying.

The surgeries were originally supposed to happen today, but emergency surgeries pushed mine back, which threw off an already carefully balanced schedule involving rides, work schedules, recovery plans, bills, food, and approximately 37 layers of logistical duct tape holding life together.

Recovery is expected to include at least a 5 day hospital stay, and because this is spinal surgery, this is not going to be a quick bounce-back situation.

Due to the severity of the spinal cord compression and fall risk, I’m also not supposed to be left alone right now and will need someone with me throughout this process. That means trying to balance not only surgery and recovery, but also the reality of feeding and caring for the people helping take care of me while living inside a hospital for days.

Unfortunately, without access to things like a fridge, microwave, or even the ability to bring and store easy meals from home, everything quickly turns into cafeteria food, Uber Eats, DoorDash, vending machines, and whatever we can realistically manage while stuck here. Those costs add up incredibly fast when you’re already operating on a very tight budget.

Like a lot of families right now, we were already living on a very tight budget while juggling survivor benefits, work schedules, transportation, medical costs, and basic day to day life. My kids had already rearranged work and travel plans to help take care of me during surgery and recovery, and the delay created even more unexpected stress and expenses.

I want to be very clear that I am not asking for luxury or anything extravagant. Any help would go toward basic things during recovery: food, gas, transportation, household bills, and helping keep things stable while I’m in the hospital recovering.

AskIing for help is incredibly hard for me. Most people who know me know I’m usually the person trying to quietly figure things out on my own while making dark jokes and pretending everything is under control.

The truth is, I learned a long time ago to minimize how bad things really are because I never wanted to scare people, burden people, or give anyone a reason to disappear. Even during Dave’s ICU stays, I often softened the reality of how serious things were because that felt easier than being vulnerable.

But right now, the math simply is not mathing, and I can’t realistically do this completely alone.

If you’re unable to donate, sharing this would also mean more than you know.

And to everyone who has checked on me, made me laugh, prayed, sent messages, or reminded me I’m not carrying all of this alone… thank you. Truly.