Hi. Yes. Hello. It is me. The patient. The victim. The tiny, fragile angel baby. Aka Xena, a six week old kitten.

I regret to inform you that I am currently suffering from a very serious medical condition called “I did something I was absolutely not suppose to do.” The details are private, but they may or may not involve jumping, zooming, slipping, and a dramatic betrayal by gravity. Just kidding. I was viciously attacked.

As a result, I have required extensive medical attention, including:

Being poked (unacceptable)

Being wrapped (rude)

Being told “no more jumping” (oppressive and unrealistic)

And worst of all… being monitored

The humans say I have “vet bills and will need at least one surgery (whatever that means).” I say I have been through a lot and deserve compensation in the form of snacks, toys, and financial support.

Please consider donating to my recovery fund so I can:

Continue my important work (knocking things off tables)

Heal emotionally (by screaming at 3am)

And rebuild my strength (to immediately ignore all medical advice)

Every contribution helps. Especially if it’s tuna.

Thank you for your support during this difficult time. I will now be accepting pets and sympathy.

Sincerely,

A brave, innocent kitten who definitely learned nothing Xena

You can also follow my recovery on my mom's TikTok- ccassietuckk OR her instagram- cassiegram526