Hi,

My name is Fash.

I’ve never asked for help like this before, and honestly it feels awful to even be writing it.

Right before Christmas I lost my job. Redundant, just like that. No warning, no goodbye, no savings to catch me. And with a baby due any day now, it’s like the whole world flipped upside down in one phone call.

I’ve maxed every credit card I had. The overdrafts are gone too. Rent is way behind, the bills are stacking up unopened because looking at them makes me feel sick, and I’m down to whatever scraps are left in the kitchen. Every single day is this tight, breathless panic about how I’m supposed to bring a tiny human into this mess and keep us both safe.

I’ve been trying so hard to get back on my feet. I’m applying to almost 100 jobs every single day. Tailoring CVs, writing cover letters, chasing every lead I can find. But nothing. Not one interview, not one call back. It’s like shouting into a void while the clock keeps ticking and the due date gets closer. I’m exhausted from it, but I keep going because I have to. My child is counting on me to figure this out.

I’ve always been the one who just got on with it, pushed through no matter what. But I’ve got nothing left to push with. The only reason I’m still here fighting is my baby. I keep picturing their little face, and I can’t stand the thought of them starting life already drowning in stress and instability because I couldn’t hold it together.

I just need a bit of room to breathe. Enough to catch up on the bills so we’re not staring down eviction, enough to quiet some of the most urgent bills and overdrafts, enough for food, baby things, the hospital stuff that’s coming fast, and maybe, just maybe, a little space where I can keep applying and actually get a foot in the door somewhere instead of feeling like I’m falling apart every second.

If you can spare anything at all, even a few quid, it would mean more than I can ever say. If you can’t, sharing this might reach someone who can. I’m not good at asking. I’m really not. But I’m out of road and I’m terrified of letting my baby down.

Thank you for reading this far.

Thank you for even considering it.

Fash