UPDATE Added 5/31: 
I realized that GoFundMe removed the link to the survey in the update I just posted-- but it looks like I can post a link HERE .  Once you've read today's update, please follow the link  to answer a couple of short questions and share your thoughts with us.  You can also feel free to email me with any thoughts or comments at all.  We are working to honor the person we all loved so much, and I appreciate everyone's support in making this happen. 

 

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The marvelous Kenwyn Dapo, aka Mistress B, passed away from cancer on Saturday, November 27th, much earlier than she (or any of us) anticipated. A flame of authentic joy and creative talent that was extinguished too soon—help us honor her with a Performer’s Wake that she herself could have dreamed up. A small circle of friends are working to throw a special event to remember and celebrate the unique person she was, aiming for late January 2022 in NYC. With your help, we hope to secure a location large enough to accommodate all of Kenwyn’s large and varied friendship networks, with grand designs for delicious food, copious drinks, performers, photos, balloon art, opportunities to share your own stories and memories (see the special e-mail contact info below) and remote viewing/participation. Can you help us throw her one last fabulous fête?

 

When Kenwyn became very ill last week, a small group of us reached out to the vast circle of people who knew and loved her. There were the witches, knitters, astrologers, and crafters. Writers, bakers, musicians, performers, cat lovers, and balloon twisters. Kenwyn was someone who was forever generous with her time, her love, and her many talents. She was authentic, hilarious, and creative. The outpouring of love and grief is truly tremendous.

 

When she was diagnosed with cancer in September of 2018, and as she fought it right up until the end, she was genuinely surprised to find herself beloved, surrounded by the love she’d cultivated effortlessly her entire life. She kept her diagnosis fairly private, and the specific details of her diagnosis and her health even more so. She decided she’d only tell those with whom she was so close, that not telling them would be a breach of trust. She also wanted to only tell people herself, and in person. She knew that with love came worry, and worry felt draining instead of healing. She thought she had more time than she did, and I know she envisioned sharing her story more broadly when she felt ready. But the end came more quickly than any of us expected.

 

She focused her energy on staying positive, pushing back against the cancer (whom she nicknamed “Leechman” and envisioned as a fat man with a bad comb-over, wearing a cheap brown suit and smoking a stinky cigar). I know that she was afraid, but she was also brave, and strong, and resourceful. She created a decorative bag to hide her medical devices. She cried. She sought out humor and started actively planning a project that would offer free humor to chemotherapy patients via free streamed services in oncology offices. In short, she didn’t stop living, and she didn’t stop being Kenwyn. Barely a month before her death, she and John spent a month in Europe, seeing Paris and climbing the steps at Montmartre, and then relaxing with a friend in the French countryside. They visited Iceland on the way home. She continued to work when she could. She saw friends, she laughed.

 

As Kenwyn herself wrote, “Cancer doesn’t win if it ends my life. I’ve gotta die of something. Cancer wins if it robs me of the life I have right now.” She refused to let that happen. But those of us who are left behind are grieving. We need to gather and say goodbye.

 

Please reach out to KenwynMemories (AT) gmail.com to share your stories, photos, videos, and memories. Feel free to write multiple times as you recall or find additional things to share.

 

All remaining funds will be donated to a cause important to Kenwyn—these are all organizations to which she gave significant time, energy, and/or money of her own: Planned Parenthood NY , Anjellicle Cats Rescue , and Broadway Cares .

 

Please don't hesitate to reach out with any questions you may have.

 

Much love to you all, and thank you in advance for your support.

 

Melody Fisher, Dana Aber, Justin Quackenbush, Verna Serra, Magdalena Schmidt, Adele Bove, and John Kail