This is not an easy story to tell and this is not something I was ready for the world to know however things have changed so drastically in the last couple months it's time to stop silently struggling and reach out for help.

this time last year I had an amazing family, a job, the best husband and we all were well and truly blessed and enjoying life as well as we could. Things started to change when I lost over 60 pounds and my health was declining over a period of time. I was in pain, I had no energy, and my body and face were changing for the worse.

almost four months ago I finally couldn't take the pain anymore and had to be seen, immediately going to an ear nose and throat doctor for assistance with why things were happening, needless to say what happened next was the unexpected.

I was rushed off to an emergency surgury where a biopsy showed that a tumor was growing inside my face that was causing mass destruction. This was by far the scariest moment I thought, pathology reports showed that my next step was to the cancer center to see an oncologist about what I need moving forward. Yup that's right the thought of being fine to having cancer has consumed me, my husband, and of course my family.

over the next few months we did CT scans, MRIs, PET scans, labs, doctor visits, medication, etc you name it I was there, to come to the conclusion that a granuloma(tumor) Non-Hodgkins lymphoma was what I had and the road ahead was going to be challenging.

scott and I have for months been silently working through medical bills, pain, stress, finances, and we are losing hope.

I am now 18 radiation treatments in and my pain is excruciating, my energy is non existent, my body has been mutilated and changed destroyed from the inside, for some of you that have known and seen me you know my voice has changed my face is nothing like it used to be and I hold everyday as a blessing.

I still have 12 more treatments as well as a long road to a reconstructive surgury held at KU since the location of my tumor is in my head and neck being close to my brain and eyes is a very huge concern and want all available doctors to be there for that.

needless to say, I'm starting to not have the energy to work, bills are pilling up, medication are becoming more expensive to give me relief and comfort when pain is all I feel. Not only has this taking me down physically which I knew would happen, but mentally and emotionally this is now to heavy of a burden to hold alone.

Scott and Kennadi deserve there wife and mother for as long as they have me to be pain free and present and right now my treatments are not allowing me to do that, I'm losing my hair, I'm not sleeping, I can barely do everyday household chores, let alone keep up with my job and the energy of a happy loving four year old.

this is my cry for help for my family, not just for me to get new medication, but to know when things get worse, when I can't work anymore, my family will have some kind of support or relief from the little expenses that are accruing.

I know there will be many questions and I'm more then happy to answer, however right now I'm exhausted, I'm in pain, I'm sad, and I'm doing my best just to get through each day and could really use any help that we can get whether emotional support, meals, or financial assistance I truly need anything that you would be willing to provide.

I know this is a long road ahead and just the start of our journey but for now I can't be silent anymore because this isn't about just my health anymore, it's about my ability to provide for my family not only now but moving forward through this horrible situation.