Aloha all, I’m Sloane and I’m starting this fundraiser to help my wonderful fiancé Tess (they/them) access the gender affirming surgery they’ve wanted for a very long time! Their procedure is scheduled for January 21st 2027. We’re getting married at the end of 2027 and I know more than any gift or party, they’d love to have their wedding in the body of their dreams, without binding pain or painfully acute dysphoria.

Tess is an extremely loving family member and friend, the partner of my dreams, a bighearted community member, and a talented therapist who has made their career in life supporting other queer and trans people through counseling and art therapy. They’ve helped many trans people begin their medical journey by providing letters of support and I hope together we can give back to Tess and help them on their journey in return! What this surgery would mean to Tess cannot be understated: it would make their body more like home, allowing them to feel euphoric in their appearance, and letting them move through a hostile world more confidently. I adore them and I want them to enjoy their life free of the burden of dysphoria.

Here is Tess’ experience in their own words:

“I think of my breasts like roommates of circumstance. We just never clicked. At some point I started to detest them. Now I am neutral towards them; we don’t interact much. I pretend they don’t exist. We live in tenuous tolerance of one another. I would be happier on my own. I’d have more space, more bandwidth to express myself and inhabit my body freely.

People can endure enormous amounts of pain. Falling in love has made me more discerning of the types of pain I am willing to endure. I don’t want to live the rest of my life ignoring a part of myself, or feeling like there’s a void between my shoulders and my stomach. I want to love moving my body. I don’t want to rationalize what brings me joy, or pathologize how I express my spirit physically. I want to walk into a new room confidently. I don’t want to regret the time I spent hesitating on behalf of fear. I want to relish the space I take up. I don’t want to explain myself. I want celebration, not tolerance.

I don’t know what the future of my transition holds, but I know that for 28 years I have been avoiding a piece of my body and I can’t stand that anymore. I can’t waste any more time in limbo.”

Accessing gender affirming care in the US is notoriously difficult and getting harder to access everyday. Tess has been out as a transmasc nonbinary person for 8 years and on HRT for 3 years. They started the process to receive gender-affirming long ago and are finally in a place where they have access to this long-dreamt-of procedure. With your help, we’re hoping to empower Tess to pursue this act of transformative self-love. The goal includes:

Tess and I will be saving as much as we can for this surgery and ask that you only give what is within your comfort. Every cent will go towards giving Tess the ability to live in the most authentic expression of their body. If you’re not in a position to donate, sharing this fundraiser is also greatly appreciated!

Mahalo for your generosity and kindness, it will truly change Tess’s life and offer them the freedom to live joyfully in their body as their happiest self.

With gratitude and love,

Sloane