Help Selena Stay at Wes
Donation protected
This is a hard story for me to tell. If you know me, you know I don’t like asking for help for anything, but now I feel like I have no choice and both my college career and personal life depend on this decision.
For those of you at Wes, you’ve probably seen me working everyday at Usdan freshman year. Like some of you, I was working to pay my tuition with some parental support. From sophomore to junior year, I’ve been blessed with working as an RA and these checks also help with my tuition. However, recent events have me struggling to stay afloat.
I do not have a good relationship with my parents, especially my mom. Being at home is very harmful to me, particularly to my mental and emotional health, and I would describe my home as a toxic environment. My mother is not a stereotypical mom; she is controlling, manipulative and not a positive person to be around. Both my parents like to hold double standards; what is okay for my brothers isn’t okay for me or my sister. The prime example is that my brother is allowed to have a girlfriend, however, I have been treated very unfairly when my parents found out I had a boyfriend. My dad didn’t talk to me for over a year and when he did, he’d disrespect me and make me feel as though our home was falling apart because I had a boyfriend. My mom, on the other hand, would curse me out, get physical at times and threatened me constantly with not providing her tax papers to apply for financial aid or taking me out of Wes.
During the COVID shutdown, I had no choice but to go back home. From March until May I struggled a lot to get by. In the beginning of April, my mother and I got into an argument, and everyday for that month I was treated like shit. She would curse me out every day and say things you would never expect to come out of a mother’s mouth (whore, slut, bitch, etc.). She’d give me cold hearted stares, scream at me for the little things and would not allow me to use the kitchen to cook and eat. Being at home, I would constantly be told of how much of a failure and disappointment I was and that my own mother wished she never had me. All of this trauma eventually got to a point where I know I was depressed and didn’t want to leave my bed for days. My dad would see me in this state and call me lazy, not realizing how damaged I truly was.
One day in May, my best friend called me and noticed something was wrong simply by the tone of my voice. After telling her everything, she invited me to stay with her in Massachusetts until my internship in June. When I left with my friend, my parents kicked me out for good and my dad told me to pick up the rest of my things or they’ll be donated. Since then, my parents haven’t called to check up on me, cut me off completely and live their lives as if I do not exist. Because of COVID, my internship ended up getting cancelled but my friend was able to house me until Wes opened up, despite me not being allowed to stay in her 2 person apartment. I did not have any close relatives to stay with and if it wasn’t for her, I don’t know where I would have been.
Since my parents kicked me out, I have to pay for college completely on my own, that includes the parental contribution, student contribution, loans and any personal expenses that may arise. If it wasn’t for the FGLI Fund and some previous money saved up from my job before COVID, I wouldn’t be here right now. This year I had to take out a loan and all of my RA paychecks are going directly to that.
My RA job is my only source of income and I am unable to get another job because student employment on campus is extremely scarce due to COVID and off campus jobs aren’t an option for this same reason. On top of this, I have regular classes, tutoring, lab, performance classes, club and my RA job, which leaves me with very little time to even attempt to pick up an off campus job. If the campus closes or I can’t stay on campus come November, I will need to pay for housing and will not have any money saved for that. I will also need to take out another set of loans again next year. I have tried talking to Financial Aid about reducing the parental contribution since my parents refuse to contribute at all, but they said it was not possible. That is why I am here asking you all for help, as it is my last resort.
Apart from everything that has happened, I am trying to hold my head up high, stay afloat and prove to my parents that I can be successful without them. If you are able to donate, anything helps, and thank you for taking the time to read this.
For those of you at Wes, you’ve probably seen me working everyday at Usdan freshman year. Like some of you, I was working to pay my tuition with some parental support. From sophomore to junior year, I’ve been blessed with working as an RA and these checks also help with my tuition. However, recent events have me struggling to stay afloat.
I do not have a good relationship with my parents, especially my mom. Being at home is very harmful to me, particularly to my mental and emotional health, and I would describe my home as a toxic environment. My mother is not a stereotypical mom; she is controlling, manipulative and not a positive person to be around. Both my parents like to hold double standards; what is okay for my brothers isn’t okay for me or my sister. The prime example is that my brother is allowed to have a girlfriend, however, I have been treated very unfairly when my parents found out I had a boyfriend. My dad didn’t talk to me for over a year and when he did, he’d disrespect me and make me feel as though our home was falling apart because I had a boyfriend. My mom, on the other hand, would curse me out, get physical at times and threatened me constantly with not providing her tax papers to apply for financial aid or taking me out of Wes.
During the COVID shutdown, I had no choice but to go back home. From March until May I struggled a lot to get by. In the beginning of April, my mother and I got into an argument, and everyday for that month I was treated like shit. She would curse me out every day and say things you would never expect to come out of a mother’s mouth (whore, slut, bitch, etc.). She’d give me cold hearted stares, scream at me for the little things and would not allow me to use the kitchen to cook and eat. Being at home, I would constantly be told of how much of a failure and disappointment I was and that my own mother wished she never had me. All of this trauma eventually got to a point where I know I was depressed and didn’t want to leave my bed for days. My dad would see me in this state and call me lazy, not realizing how damaged I truly was.
One day in May, my best friend called me and noticed something was wrong simply by the tone of my voice. After telling her everything, she invited me to stay with her in Massachusetts until my internship in June. When I left with my friend, my parents kicked me out for good and my dad told me to pick up the rest of my things or they’ll be donated. Since then, my parents haven’t called to check up on me, cut me off completely and live their lives as if I do not exist. Because of COVID, my internship ended up getting cancelled but my friend was able to house me until Wes opened up, despite me not being allowed to stay in her 2 person apartment. I did not have any close relatives to stay with and if it wasn’t for her, I don’t know where I would have been.
Since my parents kicked me out, I have to pay for college completely on my own, that includes the parental contribution, student contribution, loans and any personal expenses that may arise. If it wasn’t for the FGLI Fund and some previous money saved up from my job before COVID, I wouldn’t be here right now. This year I had to take out a loan and all of my RA paychecks are going directly to that.
My RA job is my only source of income and I am unable to get another job because student employment on campus is extremely scarce due to COVID and off campus jobs aren’t an option for this same reason. On top of this, I have regular classes, tutoring, lab, performance classes, club and my RA job, which leaves me with very little time to even attempt to pick up an off campus job. If the campus closes or I can’t stay on campus come November, I will need to pay for housing and will not have any money saved for that. I will also need to take out another set of loans again next year. I have tried talking to Financial Aid about reducing the parental contribution since my parents refuse to contribute at all, but they said it was not possible. That is why I am here asking you all for help, as it is my last resort.
Apart from everything that has happened, I am trying to hold my head up high, stay afloat and prove to my parents that I can be successful without them. If you are able to donate, anything helps, and thank you for taking the time to read this.
Organizer
Selena Delgado
Organizer
Middletown, CT
