Hello Everyone,

My name is Sarah, and I'm reaching out with a heartfelt plea for support in my journey to become a mom. As a single woman, the path to parenthood has been challenging—emotionally, physically, and financially. As a therapist with a growing business, feeling the heavy burden of student loan debt from graduate school, and trying my hardest to support my family financially, I am struggling to cover the high costs of fertility treatments.

My Journey So Far

For the past year, I have dedicated all my resources to pursuing my dream of having a child. I struggled for a long time to even find a fertility clinic or provider that was not fat-phobic and reliant on the garbage (and racist ) BMI to deny me care. I was lucky enough to find a truly wonderful and inclusive provider in San Diego, who has been incredibly supportive and kind throughout my entire experience. At 38-years-old, with lower egg reserve for my age, and having PCOS and a thyroid condition, my circumstances make for extra challenges, urgency, and costs. Unfortunately, insurance does not cover any fertility-related medical expenses as it is not yet mandated in the state of California*.

So far, I have already accrued close to $12,500 in out-of-pocket costs on:

Despite four attempts via intrauterine insemination (IUI) and additional testing to rule out issues with my fallopian tubes (all clear!), I have not yet been successful. My fertility provider has said a few more IUI attempts would be reasonable before considering moving on to other options such as IVF, which would astronomically increase the cost to become a parent, as one cycle of IVF can range anywhere from $15,000 -$30,000+.

Given my age and response to medications so far, my fertility provider is less confident IVF would be successful in relation to the cost per cycle, due to the likelihood of needing several cycles of IVF to achieve a healthy embryo to transfer. I will add that she is quite confident IUI will work for me given how my body has been responding, we just can't know how many tries it will take. I’ve also considered embryo adoption as a possible route to parenthood, but I would very much like to try to conceive with my own eggs, if possible, before going that direction. All this to say, I’m hoping to get a few more IUI tries in (OR MAYBE JUST ONE!!).

*If you, like myself, believe that access to infertility treatment necessary for so many, from single people, to queer folks, to disabled individuals, to hetero couples struggling to conceive on their own, is a human right that needs to be be mandated, here’s one place for you to learn more and add your voice: ACT NOW California IVF Bill.

Why I Need Your Help

Embarking on this journey has been both physically and emotionally taxing. As someone who tends to keep personal matters private, asking for help in such a public way is incredibly difficult for me. However, I am driven by the hope and desire to start a family. I am reaching out to you, my friends, family, and community, to ask for your support. Any contribution, no matter how small, will help me continue with the necessary treatments to make my dream a reality.

How You Can Help

Your generous donations will go directly towards covering the costs of further fertility treatments. Each IUI cycle costs roughly $3,500, which includes:

My fundraising goal of $11,000 would cover 3 IUI cycles including donor vials and medications, should I need them all. Any amount donated that is not used or needed for current/future IUI cycles will go directly to paying down the debt I have accrued from my first 4 attempts.

A Message from the Heart

If you know me, you know that I am not one to share much on social media. This request comes from a place of vulnerability and deep longing.

Becoming a mom would mean everything to me. I’ve always loved kids and had an instant connection with them. It's so fun jumping into their world and seeing things through their eyes. Working with kids as a school therapist opened up another level of meaning and a hope that I would one day get to support my own child through all the emotional ups-and-downs of life and teach them all the tools and skills to get through them. Getting to see my two nephews grow from newborns to fully grown kids has been such a rewarding and meaningful experience and only adds to my longing to be a mom myself. It would be the biggest honor to create a tiny human and get to know and support the person they become. It would also be such a privilege to give my nephews a cousin, make my sister an auntie, my parents grandparents again, and make so many of my friends aunties and uncles too! And how could I forget my furbaby, Beetlejuice, would get a non-furry sibling too. Here I am with him on his "Gotcha Day" way back in November 2018:

Aside from all of the things that make me want to be a mom, my relationship with my body has shape-shifted overtime from a place of extreme criticism and shame during my eating disorder to a place of acceptance and, at times, awe of what it can do for me day-to-day. The idea of my body being able to transform once more to accommodate the growth and birth of a whole new person feels like the ultimate chance to know and trust my body, and to experience one of the most incredible things the body can do.

I would be immensely grateful for any support you can provide, whether it’s a donation or simply sharing my story with others who might be willing to help.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story and for considering a contribution to my fertility fund. Your support brings me one step closer to the joy of motherhood and the fulfillment of having my own family.

With heartfelt gratitude,

Sarah