On August 17th, I got in a car accident, a pretty bad one that made most of my survival a miracle. I took out 2 trees (small, baby olive trees, but still trees), by some random grace, two off duty EMTs saw my crash and immediately drove over to me, and they called 911 while starting standard procedures and questions for a concussion or worse. My face, arms, neck and legs showed nothing from the airbags, a small bruise on my nose but my sunglasses didn't even break.

The moment I got out of the car, I had this awful feeling in the region of my stomach towards my back. I was sent to Modesto Sutter Health Trauma Ward through an air evac, where I spent 5 days.

I have compound fractures on three lumbar discs, having them this low is hard, because the custom fitted back brace doesn't quite reach that low when I try to sit in a normal position. I can't reach, twist, bend, or even lift a leg to a 90 degree angle, most of my time is spent lying down, sometimes at a slight angle.

It has taken so long to get a surgery option because Sutter Health felt a second procedure was necessary and they were unskilled for it, and only yesterday it was decided that the 2nd procedure is unnecessary. 

Since I'm still in North CA with my mom (bless her for being my nurse), we reached out to Stanford Heathcare Neurosurgery.

It's sadly a little ironic, I was coming to visit to help my mom, who was already taking care of my sister with stage 4 cancer and our 94 year old grandmother, and now I'm another nursing burden since my accident happened on the way to help her.

We have FINALLY been offered a scheduled surgery date, after weeks of me calling, and doing any local appt possible to provide info showing the severity of the injury.

I've attached photos of the car, the hospital photo where the only cut is from my seatbelt (which is frightening to me since it's a very dull fabric), my photos with my very stylish custom back brace (sideways), the corseted back helps on more painful days, I pull it so tight to force the support to stay aligned. I may have added a cartoon of my hopefully non future appearance. If I have to laugh or cry, then I'm going to choose laugh.

All photos will be at the bottom of this, so scroll if my writing gets tedious.

I will soon be adding Xrays or MRIs of my spine itself, which I only finally saw myself recently. 

Two of the lumbar discs are normal kind of compound fractures, they look like a very slightly squished marshmallow, but it's bone, so it shouldn't look like that.

The last disc is the problem child, it doesn't have a square shape, it has a flat top, but the bottom had so much pressure that it has pushed the flattish bottom into almost a triangle shaped base.

I had hoped with very slow natural healing process, it could be corrected, even with the pain. Unfortunately, I was wrong, the surgery is required and I'm getting scheduled for an immediate vertebroplasty procedure as soon as we get all the authorizations.

The good news is that after the surgery, the pain levels and healing factors show almost immediate results. They're injecting a plastic cement inside the crushed vertebrae, and it fills the gap and cracks back into their closer natural shape. It's an outpatient surgery and I'm grateful for that.

The downside is that even with insurance and authorization from my PCP, the surgery will range from $8,300 to $10,000 which is not something myself or my family are able to do. This has just been the most recent issue of major family injuries, illness and general health.

I'm trying to raise $10,000 before Oct 26th, as that is my planned surgery date and it will take a unlikely miracle. I asked the cost of the surgery without insurance and was shocked to hear it is  $48,000. 

I lost my ability to speak when they told me that.

They discussed a fusion option later in life, but it will not fix it on this level, and it will create major discomfort and pain for the entirety of my life. They also stated I was not a good candidate for it, not to mention it causes issues with thinks like metal detectors and travel.

Anything anyone can do is helpful, I have been unable to go home, not just because my car was destroyed, but because I have to use handicap home features for every day life things. I don't have that at my apartment, but I was the one who installed it all at my mother's for my grandmother, and now we both use it.

I took my ability to move, twist, lift, reach and bend for granted, but I'm going to do whatever I can to get it back, even if I'm embarrassed to ask for help.

Sorry for the long story if you read it all. I haven't told people most details, and this will be the first and only time that the images are shared, mostly because they scared me and I'm skittish about car rides at the moment, which feels silly and I will find a way to get past the fear eventually.