Help Rayna and Friends Overcome Medical Challenges

Hi I’m Rayna. I’m a South Asian artist located in Iowa. I started tattooing on skin as a self taught artist ( with an apprenticeship) in late 2019. I’ve had a slew of health issues / had lots of major surgeries. And some smaller procedures. These have created quite the financial burden for my business. As I’ve tried to expand and grow in this industry. Needless to say I’ve done all that I went from a 180sq ft space to a 900 sq ft brick + mortar. I’ve made significant impact in not only the Des Moines, Iowa community. But in all the cities that I’ve traveled to over the last 10 years of being a full-time artist. With Omaha, Minneapolis and Chicago being the main ones. And I know that my investment in people and those communities has made waves. So like most millennials told to work harder before and after a surgery I’ve just pushed through. Literally to the brink of being so sick, I felt like I wasn’t going to make it through some of it last December and last April. My WBC fell below normal the month I tried to tattoo 60 clients just to keep the rent paid. And it’s time to ask for help with this next surgery . Since I started tattooing, usually October is my most profitable month. And I usually have awesome flash and get to celebrate my clients birthdays along with my own on the 17th. Instead I’ll be closing my studio for the second time this year. And prepping for my last guest spot ( to finish unpaid client reschedules and ongoing pro bono work in Chicago ) as well prepping for my upcoming tonsillectomy on November 11th and 6th surgery since 2021.

But I just don’t have it in me. I physically can not risk my health for tattooing to try and push through another surgery without adequate prep and recovery time. It takes most people a full year for any major surgery to fully recover. I’ve had some of the hardest + most painful procedures in a matter of 5 years. 2 nasal poly removals, a labrum tear in my shoulder, gallbladder removal and a total hysterectomy. With several scans, specialists appointments, and labs. Covid 6 times,Strep 4 times, Pseudomonas and eventually had to go to Mayo to get a proper diagnosis which led me to Alpha Thalassemia and G6PD Deficiency (carrier) Genetic Disorders. After being dismissed time and time again and having an emergency bronchoscopy in January of this year. And while I qualify for more genetic testing, that would be helpful because I qualify to be part of the genome project which could help other South Asians. I just can’t risk the bill that would follow at this time. I do worry that I won’t have the opportunity to do so or that certain care won’t exist in the future due to the current state of healthcare in America

The last 5 years on top of teaching myself how to to tattoo. Creating a space for myself because I HAD to. And training an apprentice through major surgeries and literally the worst year of my life. I pushed through what most people would not. Because I haven’t had a choice. And I’m finally at a place where I can close my studio in Pleasant Hill, and not be tied to any financial obligations other than my ongoing medical debt. And a small amount of business overhead. Other than finishing up with my current clients at when I am healthy and can do so without risk of getting sick. And somehow through all the medical gaslighting, negligence and harm. I’m still tattooing. But my lifestyle has changed and how I approach tattooing has to change.

While I have shared a lot on social media. There is so much I haven’t and some of that is by choice. And some of that is because I know the repercussions could put me in harms way legally. By speaking out against small business owners, the community harm, prior landlord and medical professionals that have been negligent in my care.

And you know it’s funny how strangers on the internet support you more loudly and visibly than a lot of people you directly know. But they also become your chosen family / community. Even when you can’t show up consistently in order to take care of yourself. And the kindness I have been shown through my clients. Whom some have really just been through it all as well and some really hard shit. Yet are still the most caring, patient and compassionate humans I have ever met. And no amount of money can replace those lived memories, laughs and moments I will always remember.

I’m pretty terrible about asking for help unless absolutely necessary. And I kept putting off a kickstarter and GoFundMe. Because it was never the “right” time there was always another world disaster or tragedy. I didn’t feel that I deserved help more than others. But I’ve been so fortunate to meet alot of wonderful humans that have given me grace, time, empathy and compassion in the last couple years. And I don’t possibly think that I could ask for this help without helping them as well. It wouldn’t feel right to me to watch my friends keep struggling. Who I know need the extra financial support as well. And with the privileges I’ve had to travel when healthy. And build community and connections from clients literally all around the world.

And if every single client, small business owner or artist / tattoo artist shared this. I honestly don’t doubt that we could meet this donation goal together. Tattooers are constantly donating to animals, friends or non profits but rarely are we helping those in our own industry. Because it is seen as “less than” or not “grinding enough”. There’s an irony to the ableist mindset around not being able to physically push through the pain tattooing puts on our bodies.

In a time, being very outspoken as a person of color is dangerous. I know that we need to show even in our small communities what is possible. I can’t change the world as one person. But I do think I can show people what radical empathy and equality can look like. Because if I’ve learned anything in the last 5 years is that people will always judge you no matter what you do or what you say. So I’d guess I’d rather be perceived trying and failing. And being true to myself as an imperfect human. No risk, no story.

So you may wonder why I’m asking for such a large donation for a Tonsillectomy. But it’s to help my friends and myself find just a small amount of stability. That doesn’t even touch the medical debt or expenses we’ve all had to keep tattooing. Which I’m sure easily hits around $100K-$200K per person. To be honest I’d love to see the goal hit $600k which would be a life changing amount for each of us. But it feels unreasonable to ask in these times or too selfish. I’m not sure. Or that there’s no way I could possibly manage to make that much impact. Because I’m not an influencer, celebrity or someone trying to be “known” in this world. “I’m just a girl … in the world.” ( Couldn’t resist, a good laugh. Millennial trauma ftw).

So while, we are all dealing with lots of ongoing medical / chronic health issues. The total donation will be split equally amongst myself, Janel + Cam ( Owners of Atomic Tattoo Lounge and Enyo ( Co-Owner of XO Pinky Promise) . Who are all incredible tattoo artists that have helped me in many ways the last couple of years. I also want to be very transparent. They are not asking me to do this.

But when you meet humans that give you kindness instead making your life harder. Especially when they are also going through even harder times. I can’t imagine not at least trying to pay it forward to them in some way that would help ease their financial burdens as well. It’s so hard to be vulnerable and ask for help when you continuously can not get back on track. Especially because honestly people get tired of hearing that you’re sick again, or you have another medical bill. Or that you have to reschedule. Or that somehow you haven’t been able to pull yourself out of a riptide called healthcare in America.

If I’ve learned anything is that you don’t ask, you will never know what’s possible. Taking actionable change and just being willing to show up messy, maybe not doing it “right” or saying it the “right” way. Is really all we can do right now with the world the way it is. And we’re all a small piece of this puzzle trying to hopefully make the world a better place.

Sharing, liking, commenting really helps and build momentum and visibility if you are not in a financial position to donate. $5-$20 donations are just as helpful as large donations.

In order for me to keep track and actively be transparent on the transactions. I will be transferring the amount daily. And using a direct pay option to transfer the amount equally. And will post them in a spreadsheet link or via the donation page. Without compromising any personal information.

Thank you for sharing and for anyone that is able to donate at this time. It will never feel like enough to just say Thank You. But I know that with stability we can all continue to make art as our bodies allow and move forward in a healthy way.

<3 Rayna