Update (original info below):

I'm so grateful for what people have shared. Here is a sample of how the money raised will be used:

$10-25 is a great help for groceries (protein shakes, juice, soft things as the anterior surgery makes it very hard to swallow) and other food things as I don't really have access to a meal train, etc. It also helps get me to and from the surgery and post-op Dr appointments.

$25-50 helps with prescription and materials (I don't have insurance at the moment), and can help me obtain a microwave (which feels important for the surgery), some household things needed after the move like trash cans/lamps (our apartment doesn't have overheard lights) or surgery (grabber since I can't bend down, certain things to help get up given the neck collar, etc).

$50-100 helps cover some of the work I'll miss (most people with this surgery/condition miss 4-8 weeks, which I financially couldn't do - I'd like to have time to heal but I know I'll need to work). This would include electric bill, transportation - and strangely enough, help putting together the beds for the kids and I (we recently moved and I can't put them together).

$100-200+ obviously helps with the big items (like rent), access to a phone, covering some of the immediate costs of the surgery, labs, hospital stay (it's overnight) and beginning my payment plan (which is expected to cost $38,000)

As you can see - every amount is helpful and appreciated.

My original post includes the following (slightly updated):

I need an important surgery - quickly - to address a major medical condition that my neurosurgeon said could result in paralysis and is considered life-threatening.

A couple of weeks after taking the video above (the joy of watching my kids enjoy fireworks), I shared an update with a few friends: "Both my legs went numb. It's so weird. Right arm hurts but it's not the same." It was late and right before bed. When I woke up, the numbness wasn't there - but it returned the next night. In the weeks since then, the numbness became more consistent and spread to my entire right side (and pretty much below the waist).

At this point, it's hard to write using a pen or hold onto my phone. Trips to the ER showed lesions and a problem with my spinal cord - due to a lack of blood, it's weakened and that is causing significant nerve damage. I'm past the point of physical therapy, I was told. The doctor also said that the surgery is not expected to restore function. Already this is leading to breathing problems, which becomes the primary concern beyond paralysis - that respiratory problems are what lead to death in patients with "myelomalacia" (my diagnosis - if you, like me, had never heard of this - this link has felt like a fairly accurate and comprehensive read).

As much as I'm used to staying steady and able to remain calm through difficulty, this is different. This is scary, frightening stuff.

If I were in a position to, I would've had the surgery in August but I asked to hold off because I couldn't see how to do it and afford to live, especially as I had to move on 9/30. Thanks to people who gave early, I was able to get through that move (it's not quite complete - but I would've been so much deeper without your kindness and generosity).

I keep trying to work as hard as I can (employment, moving, and taking care of my health) - but the law of diminishing returns means this is getting worse and worse (here in my last week before surgery, I'm really hurting but I'm trying to get to 52-56 hours as it'll basically be my last way to earn money. I have 1.5 days of PTO available, which is basically the day of surgery and the day I'll be released as it's inpatient - and people expect it to take 4-8 weeks before I can drive or work. The doctor said that a literal misstep could lead to paralysis and encouraged me to get this done now - and yet I'm without a safety net and I am trying to get by, to pull this off and I'm not able to do so. I'm without insurance or savings - like many others, I'm holding things together with a wing and a prayer.

Thank you for reading this.

If you're able to donate, to share this with others, and/or to think of me and send me whatever positive vibes, prayers, or memes you've got - know that words can't ever express my appreciation and yet - I am so deeply grateful.