Dear Friends, family, and community members:
I’m Neesa Sunar, LMSW. I'm a social worker, musician and writer from NYC. Welcome to my GoFundMe fundraiser!
I’ve been offered the opportunity of a lifetime: The Leverhulme Trust Aural Diversity Doctoral Research Hub (LAURA) has awarded me full funding for PhD studies at the University of Salford in Manchester, UK.
I'll conduct ground-breaking research on anauralia (auditory aphantasia) in musicians. The LAURA funding will cover my tuition, living expenses and offer a research stipend. However, I can’t afford the start-up fees up front.
Why I’m Raising Funds
I must pay onboarding expenses before starting the 4-year PhD program. A breakdown of the expenses:
- $862.60: UK Student Visa fees.
- $4,914.64: Immigration Health Surcharge (IHS) for 5 years.
- $400+: backing up data on my laptop
- $700: flight to Manchester, UK with 2 checked bags of belongings.
TOTAL: $6877.24
All surplus funds raised will pay for essential psychiatry consulting services with Doromind, to ensure my continued good health. Doromind is a virtual psychiatry clinic under guidance by Dr. Robert Laitman. Their support is essential in keeping my health optimal, and my disability in remission. With their support, I will be able to reach the highest in my research.
Why This is Important
- My research is original; no one is yet studying what I propose to do. My research on musicians with anauralia will challenge fundamental beliefs about the cognition of music and sound.
- I have a disability (schizoaffective disorder). While I've suffered from years of immense hardship, I've succeeded despite the odds.
- By pursuing a PhD, I want to demonstrate that people with severe mental illness should never give in to stigma. With expert medical care and positive supports, we can live normal lives and aim high.
About Anauralia & Aphantasia
Anauralia, also known as "silent mind," is the absence of hearing sound and music in the mind as thoughts. It is determined by neural wiring, and it is not a disability, it is a different way of thinking. Musicians with anauralia cannot audiate (hear music in the mind). I'll investigate the experience of musicians with anauralia, and how they approach musical work in adaptive ways.
- Check out the Anauralia Lab's definition
Anauralia is related to aphantasia, the visual equivalent, known as "image-free thinking" or "mind's eye blindness." This is thinking in darkness, absence of thinking in pictures in the imagination.
- Check out the Aphantasia Network's definition.
About my Disability
I developed schizoaffective disorder in 2007, just as I was finishing my bachelors degree in viola performance at the Jacobs School of Music at Indiana University. I was aiming for a professional career, but had to stop performing.
For several years, I tried many antipsychotic medications that didn’t work, and I had to go on disability. In 2012, I started clozapine, a life-saving medication that turned my life around.
Yet my recovery was slow, because I worked with psychiatrists in the NYC Medicaid system for almost 15 years. They lacked expertise, they forcibly overmedicated me, I gained weight, I felt physically ill, and they refused to revise my medication regimen to help.
Those doctors told me I’d never be able to get off of disability and be able to work. Yet I succeeded. In 2015 I started working full-time as a peer specialist. By 2020, I earned a master's degree in social work from the Silberman School of Social Work at CUNY Hunter College.
Still, I was overmedicated, still the sedation caused me to sleep too many hours per day, I needed to drink 4+ large cups of coffee daily still. I felt too dizzy to exercise. I couldn’t do much more than work, eat and sleep. I had no time for leisure. I thought that would be my destiny. I begged Medicaid doctors to change my dosage, and they refused.
I kept fighting. In 2021, I started working as an LMSW therapist under supervision. I gave therapy to many clients via telehealth. At times, I had over 30 clients per week. Now in 2025, I've almost reached requirements for the LCSW clinical license, which would authorize me to open a private practice.
I traveled in Europe and India in 2023-2024, when I was commissioned to ghostwrite a book. I was surprised at how easy it was to fill clozapine prescriptions overseas. Doctors were kind. Returning to the USA, my NYC Medicaid psychiatrist refused to see me. I needed to find a new doctor.
Then I connected with Dr. Robert Laitman, an internist who specializes in the treatment of psychotic disorders using optimized clozapine regimens. He and his family have founded Team Daniel Running for Recovery. They advocate for use of clozapine for schizophrenia, currently underutilized in the USA.
Incidentally, I met Dr. Laitman's son, Daniel, back in 2011 at the Sidewalk Café, where Daniel did stand-up comedy. At the time, I was on disability, and wrote songs and performed on guitar. I had no idea of his father's work! I just liked Daniel's comedy.
Just when I contacted Dr. Laitman, he was just about to launch a new virtual telepsychiatry clinic: Doromind . When they opened in August 2024, I signed up. They immediately revised my medications, making adjustments each week for months. For the first time in years, perhaps decades, I now feel energized and in good health.
Despite my life’s hardships, music has never left me. Now, I’m turning my life’s detours into research that can transform how we understand cognition of music and sound.
How You Can Help
I can’t do this without community. No amount is too small. Even $10 or $20 makes a difference. Sharing this campaign is also an enormous help.
Thank you for believing in me. With your support, I can take this step and begin the journey toward my PhD.
With gratitude,
Neesa
Organizer
