my son David is 35 years old, he is Non verbal, Autistic (Level 3) and requires constant care and supervision.

I have stayed quiet for a long time because I wanted to protect David’s privacy. But after a meeting on March 11th, with more than 20 people—where many of them spoke about David as if he were a psychopath who needs to be locked away—I can’t stay silent anymore.

Silence does not advocate for my son.

People are talking about David’s behaviors without acknowledging the system failures and neglect that brought him here. So let me tell the full story.

In late May, Davids Group home of over 15 years, gave her 30-day notice that she could no longer care for David. she asked the state for a higher level of funding so she could hire additional help for both herself and David. Every record shows that David qualifies for this higher level of care. Yet the request was denied.. all I hear is 2 sides of the story. from the home, the state denied the funding, from the state, the home didn't submit the documents.

This woman knew David needed more staff support for his safety and well-being. The system refused to provide it.

So, On July 1st, David moved to the home of someone the former home knew—someone David had met before and had even stayed with while they was on vacation.

Transitions are hard for David. Escalated behaviors were expected. Eventually that home also requested higher funding from the state so they could properly support him.

Once again, the request was denied. with he same two sided argument of he said, she said.

Then in mid-October, David was bitten on the hand by another client in the home. I later learned this individual had already been showing aggression toward David and did not like him. An altercation happened started by the other client.

The incident and the bite was never reported to me.

It was never reported to the state.

David was never taken for medical treatment.

On Halloween, David was sent to his day program even though he wasn’t feeling well. The program called to report he was vomiting and needed to be picked up. He was brought home, showered, and slept the rest of the day.

He complained that his hand hurt.

Still, nothing was done.

On Saturday, November 1st, David had a fever of 101.2 and was vomiting, he was taken by ambulance to the TGH. EMS reported they could visibly see the infection spreading up his arm. His fingers were developing blisters.

David was diagnosed with Necrotizing Fasciitis, a flesh-eating bacterial infection.

By the time he reached surgery, the infection had spread to his shoulder. Doctors told us that if treatment had been delayed by even 90 minutes, he likely would have died from sepsis.

David underwent a devastating surgery that involved two 18-inch incisions from his upper arm down to his hand. Over the course of his hospitalization, he endured seven surgeries, including debridement procedures, skin grafts, and the amputation of several fingers.

While David was fighting for his life in the hospital, we searched for a new placement for him.

We found a medical group home that assured us they could properly care for David and support his recovery.

On December 17th, David was medically cleared for discharge. But due to delays involving the state, the new home, the holidays, and offices being closed, David remained stuck in the hospital until January 6th.

The transition to the new home was difficult, as expected. David didn’t know them, and they didn’t know David. There were behavioral challenges—hitting staff, banging his head, spitting. refusing vitals and blood draws. They wanted to do weekly blood work, which for a nonverbal autistic adult who had just endured massive trauma is not a small thing.

It was an adjustment period.

Six weeks later—on February 10th—that home issued their 30-day notice saying they could not manage David’s behaviors.

Then on February 17th, they had David Baker Acted.

He was transported to st Joes for psychiatric evaluation.

The hospital cleared him.

The sheriff rescinded the Baker Act.

But when the hospital notified the home that David would be returning, they refused to take him back.

They patient dumped him and abandoned him at the hospital.

The hospital admitted him, and during a routine bandage change the next day, staff discovered his hand was in terrible condition and smelled foul. He was transferred back to TGH where his surgical team and staff who knew his case evaluated him.

David had developed another infection on the same hand.

Thankfully it did not require additional surgery, but it required treatment.

Think about this for a moment.

David is a severely autistic, nonverbal adult. He cannot tell you where it hurts. He cannot explain what he is feeling. He has an extremely high pain tolerance. The only way he can communicate distress is through behavior.

When he acts out, people call him dangerous.

When he refuses procedures, people call him difficult.

But what if he’s simply in pain?

What if the behaviors people are labeling as “unmanageable” are actually the only way he has to communicate his suffering?

As I write this, David is still sitting in the hospital.

We are now working with the state to place him back temporarily with the original group home of 15 years, they are willing to have him back.

And after all of this—after months of trauma, neglect, surgeries, infections, hospitalizations, and displacement—the state is finally approving the higher level of funding that was originally denied.

However, as of March 14th, his placement to his former home has been denied. APD is worried that they are not a Behavior focus home and won't be able to handle him.

I spoke to the person who made the decision to deny his return to his home. and she said she would take this weekend to think about it further.

how can going back to a family who loved and cared for him for 15 years, who are aware of the escalated behaviors, who are willing to let David back, temporarily to get him healed. how can this be bad. but the state wants him place in yet another new home or even a ICF. which I believe will just be a nightmare

for David and everyone

David is not a psychopath.

He is not disposable.

He is a vulnerable human being who deserves safety, dignity, and care.

And I will not stay silent about that anymore.

please contact me if you are able to offer any help.