Doing this is for my mom,

Message from my mom…

“Hi my name is Honnah, and I am looking for some help.

I never thought I would ask strangers for help on GoFundMe... but life has a way of life-ing. And although life has been really hard and I honestly feel like I have collapsed within myself at this point, I have become a person who believes they deserve a little help.

My life has truly crumbled the last couple years… so many layers to that. I don’t even know where to begin. I’m an ACES score 9 (google it), then on top of all that I am just starting to learn that I had undiagnosed AuDHD (Autism+ADHD). I’m very highly intelligent and high masking, but also very emotional and sensitive. I seem like I am doing fine, but actually I have never really been fine. I was a teen mom who was widowed at 26, spent the last 13 years raising my 2 sons alone with no help. I put them first, no dating, I allow 0 unworthy men around them. I prioritized them, and pushed myself so hard to make sure they had a better life away from all the chaos. As a person who worked in the mental health field for a lot of years, I don’t say it lightly that my life story is harrowing and so unfair to any human. Right now, I am so deep in healing, that my entire life crumbled. I just try to stay alive now. I went from masking/dissociating to no ability to do that anymore. So much happened to bring me here. I am working so hard with such a huge team in a trauma specialized program to stabilize myself and my world.

- I need a lawyer for the peace bond hearings… I had a full nervous breakdown last week at court and I don’t think I am going to be able to do push past the trauma to be my own lawyer at trial, and zero options exist for help with this (no free legal support for this).

- I need to move ASAP!!! I need an AirBnB until I can find a new rental as I am currently 9 months into a peace bond application, against a neighbour who has been stalking me for 3 years. I told him no and leave me alone, 3 years ago. Court for a peace bond has been a rough process. He records me every time he sees me. I can’t even take my dog for a walk. I am a prisoner in my on home the last 9 months. Police can’t do much until it becomes physical, so until then they push the peace bond, but the court system is slow and honesty garbage for women experiencing gender based violence. He is intentionally making to worse too. Police told me on February 20th, that I need to leave. He is not rational and he is obsessed. I need to feel safe in my home and be able to go for walks and be outside where I feel the most grounded and centred.

- I need some relieve to the massive financial stressors, allowing me to catch up and then be able to focus on the days ahead. Right now I am trapped in endless days of feeling so deep financially that I don't see a way out anymore. I have been in this energy for so long, that it feels hopeless and my mind can only think of one alternative at this moment... which is the end. If I could take that pressure off and have space to think about future planning, like rebuilding myself and my career. Having the capacity to do the work, versus right now where I don't have any capacity due to my life circumstance.

- I need a full ASD assessment, so that I am able to understand myself and then be able to plan for the future and how to be successful in the workplace moving forward, as well as having protection from workplaces that don’t want to support my needs without the proper assessments. The waitlist for this is years, of hundreds of dollars

So… all of those things are what I am hoping that I can have some help in shifting. It’s getting harder every day to feel like there is hope to life and I can get out of the situation I am in. I just don’t think I can do it alone, and I need some help. I don’t see it as a donation… but as an investment in this world. One of the things that keeps me going, is that I feel like it’s my purpose to go through all this hardship so I can help others. I have an enormous amount of wisdom gained through this life, and my greatest passion is to hold space for others to heal. I know that when I get to the other side of this, I will be bringing back the water for all the other souls on fire. So supporting me to get to the other side is investing in that. A strong leader and advocate for those who need a voice. My doctor tells me all the time that I need to get to the other side… that I have such a brilliant emotional intelligence and strong ability to speak, and that the world needs that. I’m hoping that you will invest in her… the woman I can become in my life with a little help to get out of this hole. So far I have done this life alone… but I don’t think I need to. I know out there are people who have money and want to make a difference… well, right now money to cover the things above would be life changing and make a big difference in my life.

Please if you have the means, help… but if you don’t, please keep your money. So many kind souls help when they need it more themselves, and I don’t want money to come to me in that way. It’s okay to keep what you need.

And if you donate and want to follow my journey to see how it unfolds… you can follow me (name: Soulfully Humaning) on all platforms.”