Help My Caretaker Husband get to Cleveland Clinic

I come to you with a heavy heart, seeking your support in a time of great need. It is not only my husband of 25 years who stands at a crossroads but also my devoted caretaker, my confidant, and my dearest friend, Tom. As I write these words, I'm overwhelmed by the challenges that have befallen us. Tom's health has steadily deteriorated over the past several years, making it increasingly difficult for him to care for me.

Despite our best efforts and the assistance of a team of dedicated specialist doctors, the complexity of Tom's health issues has posed insurmountable challenges. In a ray of hope, Tom's doctors have recommended a journey to the Cleveland Clinic, where they believe he may find a chance for an improved quality of life. However, this journey is not without its hurdles.

During Tom's medical assessments and treatment, I will require the assistance of a family member to help me with the daily tasks I often take for granted. We both bear the weight of disability, and our financial situation is far from ideal. In this trying time, we find ourselves in need of your generous support to make this journey possible for all three of us.

The funds raised through this campaign will go toward covering essential expenses such as flights, accommodations, meals, and the inevitable medical bills that will follow us home. As of now, Tom's tentative schedule places him at The Cleveland Clinic in the middle of February 2024. However, we're awaiting the finalization of his appointment schedule, which might span five days after some discussions with the clinic.

Life has a way of surprising us. Our story, filled with challenges and unexpected twists, is a testament to this truth. As you read our story, you will come to understand the gravity of the difficult circumstances we have faced. Yet, you'll also find yourself pondering why life continues to test us with even more hardships.

Allow me to share a little about us. My name is Cristy Ridey, and my husband Tom and I have shared nearly 25 years of companionship. Our life's purpose led us to careers in Emergency Services, where we wholeheartedly dedicated ourselves to helping others.

Tom's journey began in Law Enforcement, where he started as a volunteer at a police department from a young age. After high school, he transitioned to working full-time as a 911 Dispatcher before eventually becoming a Police Officer. Our paths intertwined when Tom embarked on a new chapter in his career, working at Sedgwick County 911. It was here, following Tom's training, that we began our journey together. In a whirlwind romance, we started dating, and just six weeks later, we exchanged vows in marriage – a testament to the profound connection we shared. Sometimes, you just know when you've found your soulmate.

Years later, I found my calling as a Communications Specialist, working for Lifeteam, an Air Medical Transport Service. It was not long before Tom joined me at Lifeteam. In addition to his work in communications, he took on the roles of an EMT and the manager of the Wichita Ground Ambulance base. Our lives were a whirlwind of long and strenuous hours, with Tom working tirelessly around the clock, switching between night shifts in communications and 24-hour shifts on call while working on the ambulance.

They say that "God doesn't give you more than you can handle." However, life had a different plan for us. After my journey at Lifeteam began, I fell seriously ill, leading to a month-long hospitalization. It was during this trying period that I underwent a Craniotomy and a visit to the Mayo Clinic, which confirmed my diagnosis of Multiple Sclerosis. Despite several months of recovery, I managed to continue my career.

In 2011, Tom faced a harrowing experience when he suffered a Vertebral Artery Dissection, resulting in a Rare Stroke that ultimately brought an end to his career at Lifeteam. He has since been unable to work. In 2017, the challenges continued as I began to struggle at work, leading to my resignation. At this point, I believed my Multiple Sclerosis had progressed. However, another devastating diagnosis followed – Parkinson's Disease, in addition to my ongoing battle with Multiple Sclerosis.

Today, Tom is not only my partner but also my primary caretaker. I depend on him for assistance with daily tasks, such as getting dressed, preparing meals, bathing, and moving in and out of my wheelchair.

Our journey took yet another distressing turn four years ago when Tom began experiencing excruciating abdominal pain, coupled with frequent vomiting. Numerous doctor visits and tests later, the diagnosis revealed Gastroparesis, a condition that translates to 'Stomach Paralysis.' In a span of less than two years, Tom endured a weight loss exceeding 60 pounds. We were fortunate to find an exceptional surgeon at KU Med Center in Kansas City, who treated Tom and performed a surgery intended to alleviate his Gastroparesis. While the surgery alleviated his vomiting, the relentless abdominal pain remained. Tom underwent multiple nerve blocks and nerve ablations, but no solution proved to be long-lasting.

As if our burden weren't heavy enough, Tom faced additional unexplained symptoms related to his Gastroparesis diagnosis. It was only when we found yet another specialist that the pieces of the puzzle started coming together. The diagnosis was Autonomic Neuropathy, signifying damage to the Vagus Nerve responsible for regulating the body's Autonomic functions. For Tom, this translated to a slow emptying stomach causing severe digestive issues, paralyzed intestines, issues with Blood Pressure and Heart Rate control (resulting in dangerous drops when he stood up), intolerance to temperature extremes, frequent headaches and migraines, fatigue, and bladder dysfunction. Tom has also been anemic for the past couple of years due to intestinal bleeding, necessitating two Iron Infusions.

Earlier this year, Tom found a glimmer of hope as he started to regain some strength by engaging in light exercise. Unfortunately, his respite was short-lived as his abdominal pain intensified to unbearable levels. His tolerance for food deteriorated further, leaving him with a diet primarily composed of peanut butter and crackers, supplemented by meal replacement drinks like Ensure. Nausea has become a constant companion, leading to several episodes of vomiting each week. The weight he managed to regain has started slipping away once more. Tom, who was once an active individual, now needs my constant reminders to take a break. I know that overexertion will only lead to a further decline in his condition.

When Tom finally finds a moment of rest in his recliner, he clings to a heating pad covering his swollen belly. His arms tightly encircle the pad as he hopes to find relief from the pain. The frequent use of heating pads has left his arm and stomach skin damaged and marked with bleeding wounds. Pain constantly disrupts his sleep, prompting the need to restart the heating pad every two hours. It's a relentless cycle, with Tom waking up in pain, repeatedly reaching for the heating pad.

I cannot find the words to adequately convey the depth of suffering that has infiltrated our lives. Tom's days are marred by misery, and I, in turn, hate seeing him endure this torment. As I battle my own condition, Tom fights valiantly every day. Yet, the weight of it all has taken its toll, and he is wearied and disheartened.

In the face of doctors telling him that there's nothing more they can do, Tom persevered. He implored them to explore every avenue, to seek alternatives and solutions that might grant him relief. And now, the journey to the Cleveland Clinic beckons.

Our hearts are filled with hope as we contemplate the opportunity to seek the expertise of this world-class medical facility. We pray that the dedicated medical professionals at the Cleveland Clinic will delve into Tom's extensive medical history, forging a clearer diagnosis and crafting a path towards his recovery.

I humbly implore you to stand with us, to be a beacon of hope in this challenging journey. Your support, whether through your thoughts, prayers, or generous contributions, is a lifeline that will help us navigate the uncertain road ahead.

Please join us in giving Hope to Tom's future."