Help Military Family with Loss of Newborn Baby

Dear Friends, Family, and Generous Donors,

We’re reaching out to let you know that we are kicking off a campaign to help my coworker Technical Sergeant Debbie Macalalad and her family, and we need your help!

You may have recently heard that Debbie suffered the loss of her beloved newborn daughter from a genetic condition called Trisomy 18. She was not expected to live before she was born, but Elizabeth Grace Burket (Ellie) is a fighter just like her mom. Ellie lived a precious 16 hours to be able to meet her mom, dad, and beautiful sisters. She let them know it will be okay; Ellie's perfect in Heaven.

I don’t know too much about losing a child and I can’t imagine what she and her family are going through. Debbie says, losing a child is horrible because it breaks the natural order of life. This is something no one expects. It is shocking and unthinkable. Individuals who experience this traumatic event often feel isolated from the world. No one can see their hidden suffering as the world continues but a part of their world died with their child. Let’s help the Burket Family with support through their grief and for any funeral/memorial expenses. Let them know, they are not alone, and we are here to help. Any donations are a blessing no matter how small, and prayers are always welcomed.

Thank you for your support, prayers, and donations. God Bless.

Below, you will read briefly about the Burket family and their journey since Ellie's passing and why I admire them so much. Also, please take the time to read an excerpt from the obituary Debbie wrote about her stunning daughter Ellie and Ellie’s precious time on Earth.

Helping Hands

We all treasure Debbie or Sergeant Mac/ Nurse Mac, as some of you may know her, because of her enthusiasm and energy, and inspires so many others to be their best. Whether it’s full-force effort on the softball field or working long hours meeting deadlines and covering callouts; to being goofy or just taking the time to stop working to teach a coworker a new trick in Excel. I've known Debbie to reach out and ask if you'd want to go out for a jog too. She has always been willing to devote precious time to others. Her husband, Jason, as well dedicatedly served his country and retired from the Air Force. He is industrious and ready to share his helping hands and lend his skills, whether it’s fostering animal shelter dogs in their home until adoption or opening his toolbox to help someone in the community.

Giving to others without looking for personal gain, is one of the couple's true qualities. Together, Jason and Debbie raise their fun-loving, living daughter, Tori, with these same values. Tori is an amazing kind-hearted little girl. She was delighted with joy knowing she was going to be a Big Sister. She continues to be a big sister to Ellie, only Ellie is in Heaven. Since experiencing with death and dying, Tori is quick to give double hugs (one from her and one from Ellie). She is empathetic to everyone's emotions and knows to give love to those who are secretly hurting.

Even with the many struggles the family faces, they continue to smile and spread happiness wherever they go. Although Jason and Debbie are not able to raise Ellie, they will continue to be role models to Tori and Tori’s friends and anyone they meet. Ellie would be so proud. This was the turning point and the reason I created this campaign. I've known Debbie to always be courageous, upbeat, and empowering. Finding out she and her family was in pain was so heartbreaking.

An Abundance of Gratitude

The money you donate will go towards Ellie’s funeral and memorial costs and the family’s unforeseen expenses, including medical bills, funds to offset utilities, and grief support. Though Jason and Debbie strive for normalcy, they have had many setbacks. I could only assume that this is due to not just the grief of losing a child, but the emotional impact of bringing all mental health to the surface, including their experiences in the military and her nursing career. We can’t cure Trisomy 18 or watch Ellie Grace grow up, but we can help ease the financial burden and resultant stress that the family is facing. Please consider donating even the smallest amount will result in big gains.

Moving Forward and Giving Back

Shortly after Ellie's death, the Burket family learned to garden. They have found much comfort in their small accomplishment while grieving. In the years ahead, they plan to continue gardening, calling their garden, "Ellie's Garden". This has been a place of solace for the family- Debbie watering the flowers, Jason turning the compost, and Tori running around with Millie, as they all hear the sound of the wind chimes, reminding them Ellie is there with time. Their garden has become a memorial and tribute to Ellie. Their goal is to spread the love of gardening by gifting produce, flowers and plants, and compost, to their local community. Tori is so proud in picking flowers and giving them away. I'm sure Ellie would be honored to take part with her family. Ellie will continue to grow, blossom, and flourish. Ellie’s joy through gifts from her garden will be a reminder that even the smallest seed can make a big impact.

Spreading awareness

Debbie and Jason also plan to spread awareness of Trisomy 18 and perinatal difficulties. Did you know, that pregnancy and infant loss affects 1 in 4 women? This tragedy is so common yet rarely talked about. Close to their hearts now, their goal is to reach out to more bereaved moms and dads in the community and join grief and bereavement organizations. It was difficult for Debbie to find the right support. They want to make it easier for people who are deep in their grief. Debbie has already started with her new purpose in life. Though she has been dealing with her own struggles, Debbie finds ways to continue to spread her skill of resourcefulness. They have provided many grief and infant loss support to grieving parents. They plan on donating related books to local libraries- something they had difficulty obtaining, especially when funds were low.

Any additional donations that exceed their expenses and memorial funds will go towards charities they used. Charities relating to grieving fathers, grieving parents, bereaved siblings, and lastly education awareness to the healthcare field dealing strictly with how to communicate with patients going through perinatal difficulties.

We can’t think of a better way to honor and support these two that have served our country and have given back to the community, all the way to the smallest of creatures.

From the bottom of our hearts, Debbie, Jason, Carmella, Tori and I thank you for reading it this far. Thank you for your generous support.

Please see the below excerpt from the obituary:

Elizabeth “Ellie” Grace Burket was born on a beautiful sunny morning March 16, 2022, at Elliot Hospital in Manchester, NH. She came to the world in a hurry to be able to meet her mommy and daddy. Ellie graced us with her presence for 16 precious hours. She passed away peacefully around 2 AM that night while Mommy and Daddy sang to her. Ellie was such a fighter throughout her whole journey showing us hope, commitment, love, strength, joy, and peace. She has touched so many lives in such a brief time and was loved by all who met and knew of her. We are forever changed by her and will continue to love and honor her.

To read the full obituary, send condolences to the family and for additional information, click on the following link: https://everloved.com/life-of/elizabeth-burket/