Help Me Pay for the Burrito That Ruined My Life

The Story:

It all started with a burrito. A beautiful, steaming, overstuffed masterpiece from a questionable gas station at 2:13 a.m.

I thought I was ready. I wasn’t.

Twelve hours later, I found myself reevaluating my life choices from the cold, judgmental floor of a Walgreens bathroom, clutching a bottle of Pedialyte like it was holy water.

I’ve lost:

• 6 pounds

• My dignity

• Trust in my own body

• My favorite pair of jeans (RIP)

My dog won’t come near me. My coworkers won’t look me in the eye. My toilet is drafting a restraining order.

So here I am. Vulnerable. Broke. Possibly lactose-intolerant. I’m asking the internet to help me cover:

• The burrito ($6.99)

• The Pedialyte ($4.79)

• A scented candle ($2.94)

If you’ve ever made a bad decision fueled by hunger, overconfidence, or a questionable gas station attendant named Carl… consider donating.

And if you can’t donate, please share. Not just this GoFundMe, but a warning to others.

Not all burritos are created equal.

Thank you, and may your stomachs stay strong.