Hello, folks. I am currently unemployed.

In Spring 2021, I needed to change my living situation, and while employed, I put my search for a better, more accommodating job on hold to pick up and move back downtown to be walking distance from my (then) job. I resumed my job search at the end of August while it was enforced I return to the office after working 100% remote.

My mental and physical health weren't good even before the COVID-19 pandemic response in March of 2020. Working 100% remote for 18+ months did give me time to work on many things about my chronic health conditions, but my mental health continued to pinball. I had several emotional breakdowns over the course of the pandemic lockdown. These aren't unheard of for me, but they became more frequent and severe as pandemic isolation affected all of us.

Last year I began an anti-anxiety medication that also helped with chronic pain I've had for decades! This past spring my doctor added an ADHD medication that has also worked to lower my blood pressure.

In August, I began a required return-to-office plan, and found that sitting in a cube was again exacerbating my pain, tension, and stress. I held to the plan by creating small accommodations and coping strategies for myself. The first full week back after Labor Day, on my second consecutive day at the office I had a personal conflict at work that tripped another full emotional breakdown. I left work to clear my head, had a phone call with my contracting firm, and decided to put in two weeks' notice. Despite how unprepared I was, I could not face going into that toxic office environment again. The next morning, I found my contract had been terminated. I am unemployed for the first time in seven years, and the first time ever unexpectedly.

During my seven years at this org, I steadily gained new responsibilities and skills, including a professional certification that requires a yearly maintenance fee. My final paycheck is MIA, and I am currently unable to pay rent for October. I barely paid my certification maintenance fee in time for the cut off. I cannot pay for doctor's appointments (or past bills), or my next round of meds. I do not have health insurance; I pay for those medications out of pocket. I also can't keep paying for the storage unit most of my personal belongings are currently in.

For the past year, I have been coming out as trans. After years of not understanding my queerness, my trauma, my neuroatypicality, or much of anything about my hecked up little life- I had begun to come out in various ways at work and to my friends. I have begun expressing my femme gender identity through the way I dress, both in my professional and personal life. (Hormone replacement isn't yet on the horizon, though.)

For the past two weeks, I have been working on budgeting and belt-tightening. I have several promising job leads, including scheduled interviews and promising phone screens, but they are not moving fast. My friends have all been giving me the help they can, except for the one way in which I have been afraid to ask: Financial.

I've let the rental office know my situation, and will still need to make October rent; even as I work on finding a sub letter and finding a less expensive living situation. Unfortunately, my bicycle I've been using to get around for cheap has been stolen, in addition to several of my recently delivered packages (along with other people's mail from this complex). While I have a car, it needs maintenance, so I'm also struggling with affordable transportation. My mental health is taking continued hits, and I've struggled to make this plan.

My need to pay my certification maintenance fee, which will retain my advantage in finding jobs in my chosen career path of infosec, was paid with a chunk cash I barely had, and impacts the rest of my budget severely. I need to pay the utilities bills that have arrived in the past weeks. I need to pay for auto and renters insurance. I need cash for groceries and medication.

For several reasons, I am not in contact with my family. I do not have parents, and have been on my own since leaving my grandmother's house at 18. My surviving family are not people I feel can trust, and I cannot ask them for help.

Despite the challenges with my mental health, I have been building emotional resilience in other aspects of my life. Being on my own is something I've always been more comfortable with than most, but I'm not an island. Putting that aside to reach out to a community for help, this kind of financial help-- that's something hard for me.

Thank you for your time, your consideration, and your empathy.

Fit Price

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