Life is not always easy. So often we see social media posts from friends who are dealing with difficult situations; themselves, or someone near and dear to them. We all experience challenges throughout our lives ranging from illnesses, accidents, job loss, to watching our parents age. As most of you know, my life challenge turned out to be an illness – cancer.

I was first diagnosed with skin cancer on my face in 1999. Following surgery, the pathology report showed “clean margins.” Unfortunately the cancer returned, and despite annual dermatologist exams, the recurrence went undiagnosed for at least 3-4 years by the doctor. In 2008, I was officially diagnosed with my first recurrence which required major surgery and radiation that significantly changed my physical appearance. I was hopeful that once the cancer was removed, doctors could repair the damage to my appearance. I remained hopeful through all 17, yes 17, reconstructive surgeries that my appearance would improve. It never did. It hasn’t been easy, but I’ve found strength I never knew I had, and learned to cope with the “new me”. I’ve also learned everyone has challenges and we need to be grateful for the good in our lives.

I was surprised by the first cancer recurrence. But, when I learned this summer that I had another recurrence, words fail to describe my feelings – anger and fear are a good start. The cancer invaded my cheek and gums – and within a week of the biopsy, my jaw bone was exposed demonstrating how aggressive the cancer had become. I traveled for consultations with MD Anderson in Houston and, Sloan Kettering in New York City. I learned all I could about my options: chemo, radiation, clinical trials—and, based on this research, opted for surgery at Sloan Kettering in New York City.

The surgery was 16 hours. The recovery to return to some daily activities and work has taken more than a month, and I am still months away from the swelling subsiding, completing physical therapy to improve range of motion in my back and jaw, and the damaged facial nerve in my face healing so I can blink my eyelid. Once again, the surgeon was able to get clean margins by removing my cheek, gums, several teeth and part of my jaw from the right side of my face. A plastic surgeon, aka “my super hero,” took skin from my back to create a free flap to replace my cheek and protect the exposed sinus cavity inside my mouth as a result of the jaw bone removal. My super hero was also able to take a blood vessel, despite prior radiation, and a muscle from my back, and sewed both into my cheek. This involved sewing nerves together, which will hopefully, once the nerves grow together, return some of the smile I lost in 2008. I'll never have a "normal" smile again. 

With this behind me, my focus shifted to healing and moving forward. Unfortunately, the final pathology report showed cancerous cells in the jaw bone. As a result, I face a 30%-50% risk of the cancer recurring. Once again, I researched my options, and, after careful consideration, I’m now preparing for six weeks of radiation to reduce this risk. Because my cancer is advanced and aggressive, the recommendation is proton beam therapy. Unfortunately, this type of radiation is not yet available in Atlanta; and, Sloan Kettering’s facility is in Somerset, New Jersey which means once again I must leave my home, friends and pets.

I consider myself fiscally responsible and was prepared to pay my medical plan’s high deductible this year. But I hadn’t planned on incurring close to $20,000 in non-medical related expenses in the form of hotel bills in TX and NY, pet care and travel, and now another six weeks of hotel bills and pet care during radiation.

I am incredibly grateful to work for an employer whose medical plan is covering most treatment expenses and has a short-term disability benefit. However, the reduced disability income and regular living expenses (that aren’t reducing!) coupled with the costly out-of-pocket expenses I’ve incurred and will incur during treatment, is causing additional stress to an already extremely stressful and scary situation. I’m grateful to my friends and family for all they have done to date, and am torn about asking for help, but is with their encouragement that I am taking this step.

Thank you for taking the time to read my story. If you are able to contribute to my page, I am forever grateful and appreciative. Any amount, no matter how much, will make a difference.