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8/12/19
Hey guys! I just updated my “updates” section! Head on over there if you want to know what’s been going on with me & what is going to happen tomorrow. I’m sorry that it always takes me so long to update! I try to block cancer out of my mind so writing about it is hard, but I know that updating & keeping my supporters in the loop is necessary! You guys are the ones who give me the drive to fight & not give up!! I love you all.
6/9/19
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This is more of an “update” but what I wrote was too long so I decided to post this in the “story section”. I haven’t updated you guys in a long time so I felt like I needed to let you guys in on what’s been going on w me cause honestly it’s a lot & I want to be as open & transparent to my supporters. It’s a bit long so I hope that you can find the time & patience to read everything that I wrote because honestly a lot of bs & scary stuff has happened since I last updated. Reason being I was so depressed & anxious that I couldn’t get myself to write everything. I finally found the strength a few days ago & finished last night. I love all my supporters!
Hey everyone! I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted an update. A lot has happened since I last posted & honestly things have been extremely tough & the thought of writing everything out was too much for me at the moment. I felt like I needed to update all my supporters so I’m going to fill everyone in with what’s happened the past few months. Pre-warning this is going to be a long update because a lot has happened & I have to explain a lot of the stuff. Alright here we go..
So the last time I updated was 2/3/19. A lot has happened since then. I was supposed to do my regular round of chemotherapy on 3/25/19. Whenever I am about to have a chemo session I have to get blood lab tests done to make sure my blood levels are okay to do chemo. If your levels are off then it is extremely dangerous to do chemo since chemotherapy is extremely harsh on your body. I did my routine blood test on 3/21/19 because you have to do it 3-4 days before your session. On 3/22/19 Paul got a call from my oncologist nurse saying that my white blood cell count was extremely low & that I had to admit myself to the ER at UCI Medical (the hospital I get treated at) immediately. It was extremely urgent for me to go to the hospital ASAP because if I happened to get an infection, cold, flu, or reaction of any kind then I could fatally die. Reason being that since my white blood cell count was so low my immune system was also low & to the point of shutting down. That means that if something did happen to me then my immune system wouldn’t have been able to fight off whatever it was & I would’ve died if I weren’t in the hospital. It was strange because my oncologist nurse told me that she tried calling me 3x & had left voicemails, but I had no missed calls or voicemails on my phone. I know they have the correct number on file because they call me all the time. Anyways that’s besides the point. Once Paul got the call he called me & told me the news & got excused from work & picked me up & off to the hospital we went. I first went to the ER & then from there I got transferred to the hospital where I got my own room. I thought I was only going to have to stay overnight but I ended up staying for 4 nights & 5 days. They wouldn’t let me leave because my white blood cell count was still too low & it took 4 nights & 5 days for it to go back to normal. While I was at the hospital I was given massive amounts of fluids, antibiotics, Ketamine for pain, all of the other medication that I’m on: methadone, dilaudid, Valium, and ambien. Luckily I was admitted on a Friday so Paul stayed with me the whole time. He had to leave at 9pm every night because of our cat Calvin. If not he would’ve been able to spend the night, but that’s okay because I didn’t want Paul to keep driving back & forth. Plus the ambien they gave me kept me asleep. Thank goodness or I would’ve had insomnia even more so because I wasn’t at home. Once I was finally released from the hospital on 3/26/19 my whole chemotherapy schedule had to change. My oncologist came to the conclusion that the dose of the chemo meds they were giving me was too strong & that’s why my white blood cell count dropped so low. So I had a new chemo schedule & I had gone to only one of the sessions for the new schedule. When I went to the second session of the new schedule something very scary happened. It was 5/2/19 & I went in for my session. The day even started off very strange. When I went in I had to redo my blood lab test because the doctor said my platelet level was off. So I redid my blood test knowing that if my platelet levels weren’t normal then I would have to go home. So the situation was already starting to get stressful. Paul & I waited for almost an hour to get the results. The results came back normal so I got called into the infusion center. I don’t have a port (a semi-permanent IV on your chest near your heart) so I have to get an IV put in every time I get chemo or if I’m in the hospital or ER. I’m something called a “hard stick”, meaning I have extremely small veins that are hard to see & roll (move) constantly. I get poked all the time & the nurses/phlebotomists always have a hard time either putting the IV in or drawing blood from me. So this specific time it took 5 tries from 3 different nurses to get my IV in. FYI at the infusion center if a nurse doesn’t get the IV in on their first or second try then you have to wait like 15 min because they need your veins to rest. They also do some hacks like putting hot compresses on your arms to help the veins surface so they can see them better. So getting the IV in took forever & was extremely frustrating because I already dealt with the platelet issue earlier. Once they finally got the IV in I started getting my pre-meds & the process was finally starting. The pre-meds take about 30 min to administer. After that I finally was about to start my chemo session. Everything was going fine for the first 15-20 minutes. Then I noticed that something was off. It first started off with a weird taste in my mouth. It tasted like metal but also sour at the same time. Then my chest started to tighten up & I felt really uncomfortable sitting upright. At this point I didn’t know what was going on & thought that it was going to pass. I was hunched over & holding my stomach when Paul asked me in an alarmed voice “Are you okay?” I didn’t answer him right away because I didn’t know if I was okay. He asked me again in an even more alarmed voice, “Liz, are you okay!???”. At that point my face was tingling like when your foot falls asleep. My face felt like it was burning up & I looked down at my hands because they started to hurt & they ballooned up to twice their normal size & they were bright red. I felt like I was choking. I looked up at Paul & said in a scared voice “Hurry, call the nurse”. All of a sudden there were 4 nurses & a doctor huddled around me. They put antibiotics in my IV to combat the chemo meds & they put a breathing tube up my nose. They put a smoke ventilator in my mouth & told me to inhale & exhale. Luckily as soon as the antibiotics got in my system all the negative symptoms went away. That’s when the doctor told me I had an allergic reaction to the chemo meds. The chemo meds I’m currently on our carboplatin & Topotecan. These are different chemo meds than what I took when I first did chemo before I went into remission. I had to take an EKG (heart) test. My results came back abnormal which was not good at all. My heart beat wasn’t in sync & that caused great alarm to the doctor. I got on the phone with my oncologist doctor & she said that I have to stop my chemo session & that I have to get transferred to the trauma ward immediately. I asked her why I couldn’t continue with the session, especially because the allergic reaction stopped. She said that if I continued the session & had another reaction then that there’s a strong possibility that it could lead to death. After hearing that I had no problem stopping the session & getting transferred to the trauma ward. I asked her why I had an allergic reaction because I had taken the same chemo meds multiple times. She said that with chemo meds you can have an allergic reaction any time & that it’s random. The results of my EKG tests were concerning as well & another reason why my oncologist wanted me to go to the trauma ward. It was so dramatic how they went about taking me to the trauma ward. The nurse had to actually call 911 & have paramedics come get me, put me on a stretcher, put me in the ambulance, & drive me to the hospital. Since the infusion center is on the same campus as the hospital it was a bit dramatic. The infusion center is across the way from the trauma ward/hospital. It would’ve been like a 5 min walk. Someone could’ve literally pushed me on a wheelchair instead of wasting the paramedic’s time. I guess it’s protocol though. I was in the trauma ward for about 3 hours. I did another blood lab test & another EKG test. After I did those tests I got transferred to an “observation” room & I was there for 7 hours. I finally got my results back & everything was normal. Thank goodness because if they weren’t I would’ve had to spend the night. I was on hospital campus for a total of 12 hours & some change. 2 hours at the infusion center, 3 hours in the trauma ward, & 7 hours & some change in the observation room. From there my doctor told me that the allergy department would be contacting me & that I would need to have a consultation with them before any further chemo treatment. I waited for about a little over 2 weeks in limbo waiting for the allergy department to contact me. My doctor told me that they will be in contact immediately, but it took 2 weeks. During that time while I was waiting for their call I was just depressed, anxious, & upset. That’s how the health care system works though unfortunately. Everything takes forever to process & for people to get in touch with you. I finally got a call from them & set up a consultation appointment on 5/22/19. When I went in for my consultation the specialists told me that my body couldn’t handle the amount of the chemo meds that I was getting (go figure). My dose had already been dropped from the first time I started taking these chemo meds. They told me that their plan is to give me 1/100th of the dose that I was normally getting & to start off slowly to see how my body reacts & then to gradually increase the dosage. They also said that since I am now more prone to getting another allergic reaction that all future chemo sessions will be held at the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) instead of the infusion center. I will have to spend the night at ICU the night before my session & do my session the next day. The news really upset me because who wants to spend the night at the ICU every single time I have to do a round of chemo? Those are all the details that I got out of them & they said that they would be discussing everything that was told to me with my oncologist doctors. I was also given a consent form to sign to give them permission to do my chemo this way from now on. My next appointment with my oncologist is coming up soon (6/10/19). From there I will be asking a lot of questions & finding out more details about how things are going to go in terms of chemo. I got a call the other day from the allergy department to confirm my next chemo dates. Even though we chose the dates or 6/18 & 6/19 it still isn’t set in stone. Reason being since my chemo session will be held at the ICU they aren’t 100% positive if & when a bed will open up for me. Since it’s the ICU they can’t predict how many beds will be open because it is completely random. People go in & out of the ICU & it’s a revolving door. I couldn’t get a specific time out of them & they basically said that once a bed opens up then they will contact me to come to the ICU. They said it could be at 2pm, 6pm, 11pm, etc. basically whenever a bed is open for me. I asked what time the following day I will be starting my session. They couldn’t give me an answer to that either. It depends on how many chemo nurses/doctors they have available at the time. So since I haven’t been given any definitive answers I’m still in limbo basically & it is incredibly frustrating & upsetting for me. I deal with extreme anxiety & the idea of not knowing something really bothers & upsets me. I’m hoping that I will get more answers when I go to my oncologist appointment on 6/10. Until then I will be still stuck in limbo unless I get a call from the allergy department or my oncologist before my appointment. Please send me good vibes & thoughts because I definitely need them. If you can donate to my campaign that would mean the world to me. Donations have been extremely hard to come by because everyone I know has already donated. I know that money is tight for people & everyone has their own stuff that they are dealing with. Any amount would be greatly appreciated. If you read this whole thing, thank you for taking the time to do so. It really means a lot to me to have all of you supporting me! I definitely couldn’t do this without you guys! Thanks & best wishes to you all. I will make another update after my first session at the ICU to let you all know how I’m doing!
-Liz
1/16/19
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I am rewriting the “story” section because things have changed somewhat drastically from the original post. In the original post I had been diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer. I was fighting the cancer & I did 4 rounds of radiation therapy along with 9 rounds of chemotherapy. After the 6th round of chemotherapy my gynecologist oncologist had me do a pet scan. This was going to be my first pet scan after doing my radiation and chemotherapy. This scan was basically going to show if the chemo and radiation worked at all. I didn’t have much hope because I was told I was given only a 10% chance to live. The tumor on top of my right cervix was the size of my fist (about 11cmx8cm all the way around). I had death set in my mind & I was terrified of the results. Much to my surprise the results were great. The tumor had shrunk so much that they could barely see it on the screen. Since this was after my 6th chemo session, my doctor ordered 3 more sessions so we could try and nip the tumor in the bud. My doctor said that my body had responded so well to the chemo & being young didn’t hurt either. After the 9th session my doctor ordered another pet scan. This time I felt a bit more hopeful, but still had the thought of death in the back of my mind. The results came back and I was in remission. He said that the tumor was gone and I was cancer free. I was so happy I started crying & finally had some hope for my future. I asked my doctor what the next step is. He said there was this new drug called Keytruda aka Pembrolizumab. He said that it’s a good thing to take after chemo, a great post cancer medication. He said the success rates were high & that he believed in it & I should take it. My doctor saved my life before my choosing the right amount of radiation, the right chemo meds & premeds, so why wouldn’t I trust his judgement? I excitedly agreed and told him I was game. He said that he wanted to do 10 sessions (3 weeks apart) from each other. What Keytruda is supposed to do is strengthen the immune system so it can target any new cancer cells & basically stop new cancer cells from growing. It also helps with your white blood cell count. This sounded amazing so I couldn’t wait to get started. The problem was my insurance wasn’t covering it and each session was $10,000 & my doctor was requesting 10. That means I would’ve needed to shell $100,000. Keytruda seemed like a lifesaver & a great post cancer treatment & the success rates were high, so I was determined to make this happen for me. That’s when I originally started this gofundme. The original goal point was past $100,000. Thankfully my great nurse at UCI Medical was able to speak to my insurance and they agreed to cover my sessions which was a huge relief to me because I thought there was no way in hell I was going to be able to raise $100k. It took a few weeks to start my treatment. It was just like my chemotherapy where I did a session every 3 weeks. After my 6th session that I did on my 1/5/19, I had my next pet scan set up for 1/11/19. I was very scared because this was going to be my first pet scan after doing Keytruda for 6 months. This scan would determine if I was still cancer free or not, and it would also determine if the Keytruda has been working or not. I was beyond terrified and my anxiety was through the roof for over a week about this scan. I did my scan on 1/11/19 and got my results at my gynecologist oncologist appointment on 1/14/19. I sat in the room with Paul (thank goodness he took the day off work so he can be with me and support me) and about 4 other doctors besides my main doctor and nurse came in. I sat there dying waiting for them to pull the image of my scan up. There was a yellow circle to the left of where my original tumor was, about an inch over my belly button. My doctor said that the yellow circle was a new tumor. And then he basically said that I have cancer again & that I am going to be stopping Keytruda immediately because it wasn’t working for me. So many emotions washed over me as I sat there in disbelief. I was angry, sad, dazed, freaking out, tuning everything out, I just wanted to run. The good news is that we caught the tumor early & that it is waaaaaay smaller than my first tumor. This tumor is 12mm & one of the doctors compared it to the size of my pinky nub. So since we caught the tumor early & the tumor was smaller I asked my doctor if the stage of my cancer was different. He said no, that the stage will always be the same. So unfortunately I still have stage 4 cervical cancer. I will be taking new chemo drugs, and fortunately these won’t make me lose my hair. There is a small percentage of course, but my doctor said it’s very small. If anything my hair will thin so I will get vitamins and shampoo and hair stuff for that. I will be getting a phone call from my nurse sometime this week with details about my chemotherapy. The plan is 3 sessions, but the way the sessions work is kind of weird. 1 session is throughout a period of 3 consecutive days. Each day I go in and it’s a 6 hour long period. After the 3rd day the session is done. I have to do that 3 times every 3 weeks. After the third session is done I will be doing another pet scan to see if the cancer has spread, shrunk, disappeared, or if I need more chemo. This time around the chemo meds I will be taking are called: Carboplatin and Topotecan.
Now since I am unemployed and have been for almost 3 years now, most of you can see that I’m not in the best financial situation. I do get disability from the government, but that barely covers my HOA payment, electric bill (yes I’m in the CARE program, but my bills still come out to $30-40), cell phone bill, monthly necessities (ie: toilet paper, paper towels, napkins, etc), food and kitty litter for my 3 legged cat Calvin, and groceries. I do have food stamps but the amount I get barely covers 2 weeks worth of food (if that) and I barely eat... if you know me then you know how skinny I am. I am thankful that I have government assistance, but unfortunately it doesn’t cover everything.
I am also trying to pay back my property tax/back taxes on my condo. As I mentioned earlier my mother left me her condo in her inheritance when she passed away in 2013 from colon cancer. When I had a job I was able to cover both the HOA and the property tax. Since losing my job I was barely able to keep my head above water and was only able to pay the HOA. I haven’t been able to pay my property tax that has now become back taxes since 2016. I am on a slow route to losing my home, my only asset, the only thing my mother has left me. The donations from this campaign will go directly to either paying off all the taxes (depending on how much they are, OR putting a down payment so foreclosure stops & I will be making payments).
I have such great friends and you guys are the majority of my donations. I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart because without you guys I wouldn’t have any donations. As most of you know I don’t have any family members to fall back on to help me financially. My father passed away from a heart attack when I was 16, and my mother passed away from colon cancer when I was 23. I am 29 now... this cancer nightmare started for me when I was 27. I was 27 when I was diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer aka “Endocervical Adenocarcinoma”. I also found out I was anemic & that my hemoglobin (blood level) was at a 3. A normal woman my age at the time (27) should have a hemoglobin of a 12 or 13. I was dangerously underweight, I am 5”8 and I was 89lbs. I had to undergo around 6 blood transfusions to get me back to normal. I was in the ICU for over a week. Then I was transported to 4 different hospitals. I was in the hospital system for over a month (11/12/17 - 12/22/17). I missed Thanksgiving, my 28th bday (Dec 8), and almost Xmas. I didn’t even have a cell phone at the time so I was all alone. It was a hard decision for me to make a gofundme because I literally thought that everyone on the face of the earth either didn’t like me, or didn’t care that I had cancer. I’m so glad that I overcame that fear and made this page because I proved myself wrong & so many of you guys have donated, some multiple times. This makes me sooooooo happy. I do have to apologize for one thing though... I apologize that I am constantly posting my campaign all the time. I apologize that I am constantly asking for donations. There is a reason behind it though, the reason is that you guys are literally all I have. Like I said I have absolutely no family. Even the family I have left which is my half brother and half sister, I was taken full advantage of by them. They took advantage of my sickness. They tried to reap all of the benefits that I was receiving. They were stealing money from me and lying to me. They made a personal “debt” that I owe them for what they did for me before I started receiving benefits. My half sister and brother literally kept every single receipt they spent on me and put them all into an excel sheet. For example I had a full functioning working microwave. For some reason, without me asking them, they bought me a new microwave. Then boom $70 into the excel sheet. I was grateful that they bought me a new microwave, but I was under the impression that they did it out of the kindness of their heart. Another example, they bought me a new toaster oven. Didn’t have one, but didn’t want one or ask for one. Another $80 into the excel sheet. Then once my benefits rolled in each month my sister took out $200 out of my benefits before transferring the rest of my benefits into my account. She set up a joint account where I had a debit card. I had no access to the website & if I went to the bank I was denied any information because that’s how my half sister set it up. She lied on documents, she impersonated me, that’s how she got my benefits and other things for me. Then she spoke with a lawyer. She told the lawyer that she was speaking on behalf of me and they wrote up a contract. The contract was for me to agree to selling my condo to her. I read the contract and something smelled extremely fishy so I told her that I would have to read it again & maybe speak with someone else who understands the lawyer language better. Every person I showed the contract to laughed and basically asked if it was a joke. Everyone advised me not to sign it. I told my sister that I wasn’t going to sign the contract and because of that I was getting punished. Starting that month instead of taking $200 from my benefits before receiving them, she started taking $300. This went on for a few months before i mustered up the strength to speak to someone because I was scared of my half sister. She literally had so much power over me, she controlled every aspect of my life. I felt powerless under her & she made me feel that way too. Later I learned that she was committing grand larceny, conspiracy, impersonation, lying, and she is now getting investigated by the federal government. I no longer speak to my half brother either because he was also in cahoots with my half sister. The only other family I have that I speak to are my 3 cousins. We are all around the same age. I’m not going to use names out of privacy. I have my oldest cousin “J” and she is 30, then there’s “S” and she’s 29 (she’s 2 weeks older than me), then there’s me 29, and then there’s “H” and she’s 27. I asked all 3 of them to donate and I didn’t expect them to donate $100 or something, but I expected them to donate something because we are family and they know they’re all I have. “J” said she couldn’t because she had just moved to Florida & just got a job. Yet I see her on social media & she’s constantly eating out, drinking beer, going out, getting coffee. I think to myself “you really couldn’t spare $5-10 for your dying cousin?”. Then there was “H”, she said she couldn’t donate for the same reason pretty much, and she’s doing basically the same thing as “J”, going out, eating out, going to bars, etc. I had the same thought “you’re doing all these things & claim you’re broke, you really couldn’t spare $5-10?”. What surprised me the most is “S”. When I asked her about donating her answer was the most baffling. She said that she didn’t feel comfortable donating because she thinks that people who use gofundme for donations are basically the same as people begging for money on the side of the freeway. I was beyond appalled when she said that. She and I got into an argument about that and then she proceeded to block me on all social media & on the phone. So that’s my family for you. All my aunts and uncles are either passed on, or I haven’t seen them in 10+ years and don’t have their phone numbers. All my mom’s side of the family lives in Korea & I have no contact with them. The last time I spoke with my uncle who is actually a really successful businessman (he helped my mom buy this condo for me) said I was a disgrace to the family because I have yet to visit my moms grave in Korea. She passed away in Korea and was getting her cancer treatment in Korea because she couldn’t afford to here in the US, so my uncle took care of her. The thing he doesn’t understand is 1) I would LOVE to go visit my family in Korea, I haven’t been since I was 10 years old. 2) I don’t have a passport and I don’t know where my birth certificate is (my mom had all my documents, I even had to file to get a new social security card). 3) There is no way I can afford a round trip ticket to Korea (he is not willing to help pay). 4) I don’t know Korean and it will be hard to navigate myself without an interpreter, I can barely navigate around the US because I’m bad with directions. 5) I would have nowhere to stay while in Korea. 6) I am now sick and have been for over a year so I cannot leave the country. If my uncle were willing to help me of course I would be there. Anyways, I know that was very long, but I just had to explain to you guys my family situation & the intensity of it. You guys, my wonderful friends are my family. And that’s why I have to keep campaigning to you guys because I don’t have a larger audience. Thank you to everyone who has donated and to the people who have donated multiple times, and to the the people who have shared my campaign link so others can see/read my story.
Closing, please donate if you can. The campaign will be up until the goal is met. Any amount is appreciated and will help me to reach my overall goal. One of my 2019 goals is to reach my campaign goal by the end of the year. I’m hoping sooner than later. If you absolutely cannot donate, PLEASE share my campaign link! It is proven that sharing works & it spreads my voice and message to people I cannot reach. That would be much appreciated. I know that this was extremely long so I will end it with this note: if you are reading this today please be selfless and make a donation of any size. Instead of buying that cup of coffee at Starbucks drink coffee at home & donate instead. Instead of going out to eat for lunch or dinner, eat at home & donate instead. Instead of going out to the bar and wasting money on overpriced cocktails or beer, drink at home instead & donate. Please keep that in mind and do a good deed today! I sure could use all the help that I can get, thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!
-Liz
(ORIGINAL POST) —thought I would leave it here so people can see.
Hi everyone! My name is Liz and I’m a 29 year old cervical cancer survivor. I originally made this gofundme to raise money for Keytruda which is a new medication that my doctor wanted me to take to stay in remission. It isn’t covered by insurance because it’s so new. I also was raising money to pay back my taxes on my condo which I inherited from my mother who passed away from colon cancer back in 2013. I haven’t been able to pay my taxes due to unemployment, mental disabilities, and my sickness. I owe from 2016-now. I am updating the main page today (7/24/18) because my wonderful doctors and nurses talked to my insurance and got me approved for Keytruda! I am approved for 5-6 infusions, and then they will work to get me the rest of the infusions. My doctor wants me to do 10 in total. I am still going to be accepting donations to help pay back my taxes and for healing and basic living. In those areas I still need help and would appreciate all of it! It would mean the world to me if you still think I am worthy of a donation. I am still unemployed and need lots of help with living costs. Thank you all so much for your support!! It means the world to me!
UPDATE 8/9/18
I have finally set up my beneficiary for my funding, and of course I chose Paul. He is connected to me because I trust him and we share a bank account and also because he has been my rock and support throughout my journey. I would be nowhere without him. He has been keeping me positive and sane throughout this whole cancer journey. We have a joint account at School’s First Credit Union and he is the main one on the account where I am the joint and he is the only one with the savings account. We want to save until we actually hit our goal, so we thought it would be smarter to have Paul be my beneficiary and have the donations get sent straight to his savings account. There was a deadline to do this and we finally did it last night, we only had 2 more days to do it lol or we wouldn’t have been able to get any more donations. Good thing we got it done!
Hey guys! I just updated my “updates” section! Head on over there if you want to know what’s been going on with me & what is going to happen tomorrow. I’m sorry that it always takes me so long to update! I try to block cancer out of my mind so writing about it is hard, but I know that updating & keeping my supporters in the loop is necessary! You guys are the ones who give me the drive to fight & not give up!! I love you all.
6/9/19
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This is more of an “update” but what I wrote was too long so I decided to post this in the “story section”. I haven’t updated you guys in a long time so I felt like I needed to let you guys in on what’s been going on w me cause honestly it’s a lot & I want to be as open & transparent to my supporters. It’s a bit long so I hope that you can find the time & patience to read everything that I wrote because honestly a lot of bs & scary stuff has happened since I last updated. Reason being I was so depressed & anxious that I couldn’t get myself to write everything. I finally found the strength a few days ago & finished last night. I love all my supporters!
Hey everyone! I know it’s been a while since I’ve posted an update. A lot has happened since I last posted & honestly things have been extremely tough & the thought of writing everything out was too much for me at the moment. I felt like I needed to update all my supporters so I’m going to fill everyone in with what’s happened the past few months. Pre-warning this is going to be a long update because a lot has happened & I have to explain a lot of the stuff. Alright here we go..
So the last time I updated was 2/3/19. A lot has happened since then. I was supposed to do my regular round of chemotherapy on 3/25/19. Whenever I am about to have a chemo session I have to get blood lab tests done to make sure my blood levels are okay to do chemo. If your levels are off then it is extremely dangerous to do chemo since chemotherapy is extremely harsh on your body. I did my routine blood test on 3/21/19 because you have to do it 3-4 days before your session. On 3/22/19 Paul got a call from my oncologist nurse saying that my white blood cell count was extremely low & that I had to admit myself to the ER at UCI Medical (the hospital I get treated at) immediately. It was extremely urgent for me to go to the hospital ASAP because if I happened to get an infection, cold, flu, or reaction of any kind then I could fatally die. Reason being that since my white blood cell count was so low my immune system was also low & to the point of shutting down. That means that if something did happen to me then my immune system wouldn’t have been able to fight off whatever it was & I would’ve died if I weren’t in the hospital. It was strange because my oncologist nurse told me that she tried calling me 3x & had left voicemails, but I had no missed calls or voicemails on my phone. I know they have the correct number on file because they call me all the time. Anyways that’s besides the point. Once Paul got the call he called me & told me the news & got excused from work & picked me up & off to the hospital we went. I first went to the ER & then from there I got transferred to the hospital where I got my own room. I thought I was only going to have to stay overnight but I ended up staying for 4 nights & 5 days. They wouldn’t let me leave because my white blood cell count was still too low & it took 4 nights & 5 days for it to go back to normal. While I was at the hospital I was given massive amounts of fluids, antibiotics, Ketamine for pain, all of the other medication that I’m on: methadone, dilaudid, Valium, and ambien. Luckily I was admitted on a Friday so Paul stayed with me the whole time. He had to leave at 9pm every night because of our cat Calvin. If not he would’ve been able to spend the night, but that’s okay because I didn’t want Paul to keep driving back & forth. Plus the ambien they gave me kept me asleep. Thank goodness or I would’ve had insomnia even more so because I wasn’t at home. Once I was finally released from the hospital on 3/26/19 my whole chemotherapy schedule had to change. My oncologist came to the conclusion that the dose of the chemo meds they were giving me was too strong & that’s why my white blood cell count dropped so low. So I had a new chemo schedule & I had gone to only one of the sessions for the new schedule. When I went to the second session of the new schedule something very scary happened. It was 5/2/19 & I went in for my session. The day even started off very strange. When I went in I had to redo my blood lab test because the doctor said my platelet level was off. So I redid my blood test knowing that if my platelet levels weren’t normal then I would have to go home. So the situation was already starting to get stressful. Paul & I waited for almost an hour to get the results. The results came back normal so I got called into the infusion center. I don’t have a port (a semi-permanent IV on your chest near your heart) so I have to get an IV put in every time I get chemo or if I’m in the hospital or ER. I’m something called a “hard stick”, meaning I have extremely small veins that are hard to see & roll (move) constantly. I get poked all the time & the nurses/phlebotomists always have a hard time either putting the IV in or drawing blood from me. So this specific time it took 5 tries from 3 different nurses to get my IV in. FYI at the infusion center if a nurse doesn’t get the IV in on their first or second try then you have to wait like 15 min because they need your veins to rest. They also do some hacks like putting hot compresses on your arms to help the veins surface so they can see them better. So getting the IV in took forever & was extremely frustrating because I already dealt with the platelet issue earlier. Once they finally got the IV in I started getting my pre-meds & the process was finally starting. The pre-meds take about 30 min to administer. After that I finally was about to start my chemo session. Everything was going fine for the first 15-20 minutes. Then I noticed that something was off. It first started off with a weird taste in my mouth. It tasted like metal but also sour at the same time. Then my chest started to tighten up & I felt really uncomfortable sitting upright. At this point I didn’t know what was going on & thought that it was going to pass. I was hunched over & holding my stomach when Paul asked me in an alarmed voice “Are you okay?” I didn’t answer him right away because I didn’t know if I was okay. He asked me again in an even more alarmed voice, “Liz, are you okay!???”. At that point my face was tingling like when your foot falls asleep. My face felt like it was burning up & I looked down at my hands because they started to hurt & they ballooned up to twice their normal size & they were bright red. I felt like I was choking. I looked up at Paul & said in a scared voice “Hurry, call the nurse”. All of a sudden there were 4 nurses & a doctor huddled around me. They put antibiotics in my IV to combat the chemo meds & they put a breathing tube up my nose. They put a smoke ventilator in my mouth & told me to inhale & exhale. Luckily as soon as the antibiotics got in my system all the negative symptoms went away. That’s when the doctor told me I had an allergic reaction to the chemo meds. The chemo meds I’m currently on our carboplatin & Topotecan. These are different chemo meds than what I took when I first did chemo before I went into remission. I had to take an EKG (heart) test. My results came back abnormal which was not good at all. My heart beat wasn’t in sync & that caused great alarm to the doctor. I got on the phone with my oncologist doctor & she said that I have to stop my chemo session & that I have to get transferred to the trauma ward immediately. I asked her why I couldn’t continue with the session, especially because the allergic reaction stopped. She said that if I continued the session & had another reaction then that there’s a strong possibility that it could lead to death. After hearing that I had no problem stopping the session & getting transferred to the trauma ward. I asked her why I had an allergic reaction because I had taken the same chemo meds multiple times. She said that with chemo meds you can have an allergic reaction any time & that it’s random. The results of my EKG tests were concerning as well & another reason why my oncologist wanted me to go to the trauma ward. It was so dramatic how they went about taking me to the trauma ward. The nurse had to actually call 911 & have paramedics come get me, put me on a stretcher, put me in the ambulance, & drive me to the hospital. Since the infusion center is on the same campus as the hospital it was a bit dramatic. The infusion center is across the way from the trauma ward/hospital. It would’ve been like a 5 min walk. Someone could’ve literally pushed me on a wheelchair instead of wasting the paramedic’s time. I guess it’s protocol though. I was in the trauma ward for about 3 hours. I did another blood lab test & another EKG test. After I did those tests I got transferred to an “observation” room & I was there for 7 hours. I finally got my results back & everything was normal. Thank goodness because if they weren’t I would’ve had to spend the night. I was on hospital campus for a total of 12 hours & some change. 2 hours at the infusion center, 3 hours in the trauma ward, & 7 hours & some change in the observation room. From there my doctor told me that the allergy department would be contacting me & that I would need to have a consultation with them before any further chemo treatment. I waited for about a little over 2 weeks in limbo waiting for the allergy department to contact me. My doctor told me that they will be in contact immediately, but it took 2 weeks. During that time while I was waiting for their call I was just depressed, anxious, & upset. That’s how the health care system works though unfortunately. Everything takes forever to process & for people to get in touch with you. I finally got a call from them & set up a consultation appointment on 5/22/19. When I went in for my consultation the specialists told me that my body couldn’t handle the amount of the chemo meds that I was getting (go figure). My dose had already been dropped from the first time I started taking these chemo meds. They told me that their plan is to give me 1/100th of the dose that I was normally getting & to start off slowly to see how my body reacts & then to gradually increase the dosage. They also said that since I am now more prone to getting another allergic reaction that all future chemo sessions will be held at the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) instead of the infusion center. I will have to spend the night at ICU the night before my session & do my session the next day. The news really upset me because who wants to spend the night at the ICU every single time I have to do a round of chemo? Those are all the details that I got out of them & they said that they would be discussing everything that was told to me with my oncologist doctors. I was also given a consent form to sign to give them permission to do my chemo this way from now on. My next appointment with my oncologist is coming up soon (6/10/19). From there I will be asking a lot of questions & finding out more details about how things are going to go in terms of chemo. I got a call the other day from the allergy department to confirm my next chemo dates. Even though we chose the dates or 6/18 & 6/19 it still isn’t set in stone. Reason being since my chemo session will be held at the ICU they aren’t 100% positive if & when a bed will open up for me. Since it’s the ICU they can’t predict how many beds will be open because it is completely random. People go in & out of the ICU & it’s a revolving door. I couldn’t get a specific time out of them & they basically said that once a bed opens up then they will contact me to come to the ICU. They said it could be at 2pm, 6pm, 11pm, etc. basically whenever a bed is open for me. I asked what time the following day I will be starting my session. They couldn’t give me an answer to that either. It depends on how many chemo nurses/doctors they have available at the time. So since I haven’t been given any definitive answers I’m still in limbo basically & it is incredibly frustrating & upsetting for me. I deal with extreme anxiety & the idea of not knowing something really bothers & upsets me. I’m hoping that I will get more answers when I go to my oncologist appointment on 6/10. Until then I will be still stuck in limbo unless I get a call from the allergy department or my oncologist before my appointment. Please send me good vibes & thoughts because I definitely need them. If you can donate to my campaign that would mean the world to me. Donations have been extremely hard to come by because everyone I know has already donated. I know that money is tight for people & everyone has their own stuff that they are dealing with. Any amount would be greatly appreciated. If you read this whole thing, thank you for taking the time to do so. It really means a lot to me to have all of you supporting me! I definitely couldn’t do this without you guys! Thanks & best wishes to you all. I will make another update after my first session at the ICU to let you all know how I’m doing!
-Liz
1/16/19
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I am rewriting the “story” section because things have changed somewhat drastically from the original post. In the original post I had been diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer. I was fighting the cancer & I did 4 rounds of radiation therapy along with 9 rounds of chemotherapy. After the 6th round of chemotherapy my gynecologist oncologist had me do a pet scan. This was going to be my first pet scan after doing my radiation and chemotherapy. This scan was basically going to show if the chemo and radiation worked at all. I didn’t have much hope because I was told I was given only a 10% chance to live. The tumor on top of my right cervix was the size of my fist (about 11cmx8cm all the way around). I had death set in my mind & I was terrified of the results. Much to my surprise the results were great. The tumor had shrunk so much that they could barely see it on the screen. Since this was after my 6th chemo session, my doctor ordered 3 more sessions so we could try and nip the tumor in the bud. My doctor said that my body had responded so well to the chemo & being young didn’t hurt either. After the 9th session my doctor ordered another pet scan. This time I felt a bit more hopeful, but still had the thought of death in the back of my mind. The results came back and I was in remission. He said that the tumor was gone and I was cancer free. I was so happy I started crying & finally had some hope for my future. I asked my doctor what the next step is. He said there was this new drug called Keytruda aka Pembrolizumab. He said that it’s a good thing to take after chemo, a great post cancer medication. He said the success rates were high & that he believed in it & I should take it. My doctor saved my life before my choosing the right amount of radiation, the right chemo meds & premeds, so why wouldn’t I trust his judgement? I excitedly agreed and told him I was game. He said that he wanted to do 10 sessions (3 weeks apart) from each other. What Keytruda is supposed to do is strengthen the immune system so it can target any new cancer cells & basically stop new cancer cells from growing. It also helps with your white blood cell count. This sounded amazing so I couldn’t wait to get started. The problem was my insurance wasn’t covering it and each session was $10,000 & my doctor was requesting 10. That means I would’ve needed to shell $100,000. Keytruda seemed like a lifesaver & a great post cancer treatment & the success rates were high, so I was determined to make this happen for me. That’s when I originally started this gofundme. The original goal point was past $100,000. Thankfully my great nurse at UCI Medical was able to speak to my insurance and they agreed to cover my sessions which was a huge relief to me because I thought there was no way in hell I was going to be able to raise $100k. It took a few weeks to start my treatment. It was just like my chemotherapy where I did a session every 3 weeks. After my 6th session that I did on my 1/5/19, I had my next pet scan set up for 1/11/19. I was very scared because this was going to be my first pet scan after doing Keytruda for 6 months. This scan would determine if I was still cancer free or not, and it would also determine if the Keytruda has been working or not. I was beyond terrified and my anxiety was through the roof for over a week about this scan. I did my scan on 1/11/19 and got my results at my gynecologist oncologist appointment on 1/14/19. I sat in the room with Paul (thank goodness he took the day off work so he can be with me and support me) and about 4 other doctors besides my main doctor and nurse came in. I sat there dying waiting for them to pull the image of my scan up. There was a yellow circle to the left of where my original tumor was, about an inch over my belly button. My doctor said that the yellow circle was a new tumor. And then he basically said that I have cancer again & that I am going to be stopping Keytruda immediately because it wasn’t working for me. So many emotions washed over me as I sat there in disbelief. I was angry, sad, dazed, freaking out, tuning everything out, I just wanted to run. The good news is that we caught the tumor early & that it is waaaaaay smaller than my first tumor. This tumor is 12mm & one of the doctors compared it to the size of my pinky nub. So since we caught the tumor early & the tumor was smaller I asked my doctor if the stage of my cancer was different. He said no, that the stage will always be the same. So unfortunately I still have stage 4 cervical cancer. I will be taking new chemo drugs, and fortunately these won’t make me lose my hair. There is a small percentage of course, but my doctor said it’s very small. If anything my hair will thin so I will get vitamins and shampoo and hair stuff for that. I will be getting a phone call from my nurse sometime this week with details about my chemotherapy. The plan is 3 sessions, but the way the sessions work is kind of weird. 1 session is throughout a period of 3 consecutive days. Each day I go in and it’s a 6 hour long period. After the 3rd day the session is done. I have to do that 3 times every 3 weeks. After the third session is done I will be doing another pet scan to see if the cancer has spread, shrunk, disappeared, or if I need more chemo. This time around the chemo meds I will be taking are called: Carboplatin and Topotecan.
Now since I am unemployed and have been for almost 3 years now, most of you can see that I’m not in the best financial situation. I do get disability from the government, but that barely covers my HOA payment, electric bill (yes I’m in the CARE program, but my bills still come out to $30-40), cell phone bill, monthly necessities (ie: toilet paper, paper towels, napkins, etc), food and kitty litter for my 3 legged cat Calvin, and groceries. I do have food stamps but the amount I get barely covers 2 weeks worth of food (if that) and I barely eat... if you know me then you know how skinny I am. I am thankful that I have government assistance, but unfortunately it doesn’t cover everything.
I am also trying to pay back my property tax/back taxes on my condo. As I mentioned earlier my mother left me her condo in her inheritance when she passed away in 2013 from colon cancer. When I had a job I was able to cover both the HOA and the property tax. Since losing my job I was barely able to keep my head above water and was only able to pay the HOA. I haven’t been able to pay my property tax that has now become back taxes since 2016. I am on a slow route to losing my home, my only asset, the only thing my mother has left me. The donations from this campaign will go directly to either paying off all the taxes (depending on how much they are, OR putting a down payment so foreclosure stops & I will be making payments).
I have such great friends and you guys are the majority of my donations. I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart because without you guys I wouldn’t have any donations. As most of you know I don’t have any family members to fall back on to help me financially. My father passed away from a heart attack when I was 16, and my mother passed away from colon cancer when I was 23. I am 29 now... this cancer nightmare started for me when I was 27. I was 27 when I was diagnosed with stage 4 cervical cancer aka “Endocervical Adenocarcinoma”. I also found out I was anemic & that my hemoglobin (blood level) was at a 3. A normal woman my age at the time (27) should have a hemoglobin of a 12 or 13. I was dangerously underweight, I am 5”8 and I was 89lbs. I had to undergo around 6 blood transfusions to get me back to normal. I was in the ICU for over a week. Then I was transported to 4 different hospitals. I was in the hospital system for over a month (11/12/17 - 12/22/17). I missed Thanksgiving, my 28th bday (Dec 8), and almost Xmas. I didn’t even have a cell phone at the time so I was all alone. It was a hard decision for me to make a gofundme because I literally thought that everyone on the face of the earth either didn’t like me, or didn’t care that I had cancer. I’m so glad that I overcame that fear and made this page because I proved myself wrong & so many of you guys have donated, some multiple times. This makes me sooooooo happy. I do have to apologize for one thing though... I apologize that I am constantly posting my campaign all the time. I apologize that I am constantly asking for donations. There is a reason behind it though, the reason is that you guys are literally all I have. Like I said I have absolutely no family. Even the family I have left which is my half brother and half sister, I was taken full advantage of by them. They took advantage of my sickness. They tried to reap all of the benefits that I was receiving. They were stealing money from me and lying to me. They made a personal “debt” that I owe them for what they did for me before I started receiving benefits. My half sister and brother literally kept every single receipt they spent on me and put them all into an excel sheet. For example I had a full functioning working microwave. For some reason, without me asking them, they bought me a new microwave. Then boom $70 into the excel sheet. I was grateful that they bought me a new microwave, but I was under the impression that they did it out of the kindness of their heart. Another example, they bought me a new toaster oven. Didn’t have one, but didn’t want one or ask for one. Another $80 into the excel sheet. Then once my benefits rolled in each month my sister took out $200 out of my benefits before transferring the rest of my benefits into my account. She set up a joint account where I had a debit card. I had no access to the website & if I went to the bank I was denied any information because that’s how my half sister set it up. She lied on documents, she impersonated me, that’s how she got my benefits and other things for me. Then she spoke with a lawyer. She told the lawyer that she was speaking on behalf of me and they wrote up a contract. The contract was for me to agree to selling my condo to her. I read the contract and something smelled extremely fishy so I told her that I would have to read it again & maybe speak with someone else who understands the lawyer language better. Every person I showed the contract to laughed and basically asked if it was a joke. Everyone advised me not to sign it. I told my sister that I wasn’t going to sign the contract and because of that I was getting punished. Starting that month instead of taking $200 from my benefits before receiving them, she started taking $300. This went on for a few months before i mustered up the strength to speak to someone because I was scared of my half sister. She literally had so much power over me, she controlled every aspect of my life. I felt powerless under her & she made me feel that way too. Later I learned that she was committing grand larceny, conspiracy, impersonation, lying, and she is now getting investigated by the federal government. I no longer speak to my half brother either because he was also in cahoots with my half sister. The only other family I have that I speak to are my 3 cousins. We are all around the same age. I’m not going to use names out of privacy. I have my oldest cousin “J” and she is 30, then there’s “S” and she’s 29 (she’s 2 weeks older than me), then there’s me 29, and then there’s “H” and she’s 27. I asked all 3 of them to donate and I didn’t expect them to donate $100 or something, but I expected them to donate something because we are family and they know they’re all I have. “J” said she couldn’t because she had just moved to Florida & just got a job. Yet I see her on social media & she’s constantly eating out, drinking beer, going out, getting coffee. I think to myself “you really couldn’t spare $5-10 for your dying cousin?”. Then there was “H”, she said she couldn’t donate for the same reason pretty much, and she’s doing basically the same thing as “J”, going out, eating out, going to bars, etc. I had the same thought “you’re doing all these things & claim you’re broke, you really couldn’t spare $5-10?”. What surprised me the most is “S”. When I asked her about donating her answer was the most baffling. She said that she didn’t feel comfortable donating because she thinks that people who use gofundme for donations are basically the same as people begging for money on the side of the freeway. I was beyond appalled when she said that. She and I got into an argument about that and then she proceeded to block me on all social media & on the phone. So that’s my family for you. All my aunts and uncles are either passed on, or I haven’t seen them in 10+ years and don’t have their phone numbers. All my mom’s side of the family lives in Korea & I have no contact with them. The last time I spoke with my uncle who is actually a really successful businessman (he helped my mom buy this condo for me) said I was a disgrace to the family because I have yet to visit my moms grave in Korea. She passed away in Korea and was getting her cancer treatment in Korea because she couldn’t afford to here in the US, so my uncle took care of her. The thing he doesn’t understand is 1) I would LOVE to go visit my family in Korea, I haven’t been since I was 10 years old. 2) I don’t have a passport and I don’t know where my birth certificate is (my mom had all my documents, I even had to file to get a new social security card). 3) There is no way I can afford a round trip ticket to Korea (he is not willing to help pay). 4) I don’t know Korean and it will be hard to navigate myself without an interpreter, I can barely navigate around the US because I’m bad with directions. 5) I would have nowhere to stay while in Korea. 6) I am now sick and have been for over a year so I cannot leave the country. If my uncle were willing to help me of course I would be there. Anyways, I know that was very long, but I just had to explain to you guys my family situation & the intensity of it. You guys, my wonderful friends are my family. And that’s why I have to keep campaigning to you guys because I don’t have a larger audience. Thank you to everyone who has donated and to the people who have donated multiple times, and to the the people who have shared my campaign link so others can see/read my story.
Closing, please donate if you can. The campaign will be up until the goal is met. Any amount is appreciated and will help me to reach my overall goal. One of my 2019 goals is to reach my campaign goal by the end of the year. I’m hoping sooner than later. If you absolutely cannot donate, PLEASE share my campaign link! It is proven that sharing works & it spreads my voice and message to people I cannot reach. That would be much appreciated. I know that this was extremely long so I will end it with this note: if you are reading this today please be selfless and make a donation of any size. Instead of buying that cup of coffee at Starbucks drink coffee at home & donate instead. Instead of going out to eat for lunch or dinner, eat at home & donate instead. Instead of going out to the bar and wasting money on overpriced cocktails or beer, drink at home instead & donate. Please keep that in mind and do a good deed today! I sure could use all the help that I can get, thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!
-Liz
(ORIGINAL POST) —thought I would leave it here so people can see.
Hi everyone! My name is Liz and I’m a 29 year old cervical cancer survivor. I originally made this gofundme to raise money for Keytruda which is a new medication that my doctor wanted me to take to stay in remission. It isn’t covered by insurance because it’s so new. I also was raising money to pay back my taxes on my condo which I inherited from my mother who passed away from colon cancer back in 2013. I haven’t been able to pay my taxes due to unemployment, mental disabilities, and my sickness. I owe from 2016-now. I am updating the main page today (7/24/18) because my wonderful doctors and nurses talked to my insurance and got me approved for Keytruda! I am approved for 5-6 infusions, and then they will work to get me the rest of the infusions. My doctor wants me to do 10 in total. I am still going to be accepting donations to help pay back my taxes and for healing and basic living. In those areas I still need help and would appreciate all of it! It would mean the world to me if you still think I am worthy of a donation. I am still unemployed and need lots of help with living costs. Thank you all so much for your support!! It means the world to me!
UPDATE 8/9/18
I have finally set up my beneficiary for my funding, and of course I chose Paul. He is connected to me because I trust him and we share a bank account and also because he has been my rock and support throughout my journey. I would be nowhere without him. He has been keeping me positive and sane throughout this whole cancer journey. We have a joint account at School’s First Credit Union and he is the main one on the account where I am the joint and he is the only one with the savings account. We want to save until we actually hit our goal, so we thought it would be smarter to have Paul be my beneficiary and have the donations get sent straight to his savings account. There was a deadline to do this and we finally did it last night, we only had 2 more days to do it lol or we wouldn’t have been able to get any more donations. Good thing we got it done!
Organizer and beneficiary
Paul Kubasek
Beneficiary