Help Lay Tony to Rest with Dignity and Love

In Loving Memory of My Brother Tony

“What did you say ‘bout my brother?

That’s not a stray, that’s my brother.

You stay away from my brother —

’Cause I say so.”

Those lyrics from a popular Disney song always remind me of my brother Tony.

Tony lived with mental illness, and like many others in his situation, he ended up homeless — living in a shelter system that failed to support him. These shelters aren’t built for people with mental health challenges. Residents are forced to leave during the day regardless of weather, and if they miss curfew or mealtimes, they’re turned away. When Tony was transferred or kicked out, any progress he made toward stable housing would be reset, and we’d have to start the process all over again.

Even his treatment was unreliable. Though he received monthly injections for his condition, his medication often stopped working. He’d end up in psychiatric hospitals, only to be released after a brief evaluation — even when he clearly wasn’t well. It was a cycle of chaos and neglect.

But Tony was so much more than his circumstances. He was my brother, and I loved him deeply — even when it was hard. Over the last years of his life, I spent more time with him than anyone else. I went with him to appointments, helped him replace broken glasses or stolen phones, and made sure he had clothes and something to eat. One of his favorite things was simply stopping to get a bite together. And whenever we did, he’d sincerely pray and thank God for his meal — a habit he kept even when he had almost nothing.

I remember one day when he didn’t like the food we ordered. Instead of throwing it away, I suggested we give it to a homeless man sitting nearby. Tony agreed, but explained that even in his worst moments, he’d never had to dig through trash for food. That’s why he was always so thankful — because he believed God would provide.

Tony identified as one of Jehovah’s Witness, although he wasn’t able to be all that it means to be one. He was never baptized but during times of mental clarity which were few he did have a bible study and attended meetings. His faith gave him peace. He trusted that Jehovah would take care of him and truly believed in the promise of a better world to come — a world without pain, sickness, or homelessness.

The Bible says at John 11:25: “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who exercises faith in me, even though he dies, will come to life…”

And at Revelation 21:3,4: “He will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more…”

Tony is now at rest. He’s free from his pain and hardship. And I have faith that, in God’s promised new world, he will awaken to a life of peace, joy, and dignity — the life he deserved all along.

Thank you for honoring Tony’s memory.