Loretta, my beautiful wife, is lying in a hospital bed beside me as I write this. I have loved her since the day we met 25 years ago, and for the past 19 years, I’ve had the privilege of calling her my wife. Watching her go through this has been one of the hardest things I have ever experienced. On July 15, Loretta was suddenly admitted to the hospital after becoming septic from a devastating infection in her spine. She was diagnosed with multiple epidural abscesses, osteomyelitis, and discitis. On July 28, she underwent emergency spinal surgery—a T10-T12 laminectomy—to try to stop the infection from progressing. She was discharged home on July 31, but just three days later, our two teenage boys and I found ourselves unable to get her out of bed. She was taken back to the hospital by ambulance on August 3 and spent another 10 days there before being discharged on August 13. Six days later, on August 19, we had to call another ambulance. With each hospitalization, Loretta’s condition seemed to worsen. Her legs still work, but she is battling tremendous pain, debilitating muscle spasms, and severe nerve pain. MRIs and CT scans have revealed additional vertebral fractures and new abscesses. The most recent scans now show that two of her vertebrae—T11 and T12—have completely collapsed and fractured into pieces. Her neurosurgeon has explained that the resulting kyphosis, or rounding of her upper back, is continuing to worsen. He is extremely concerned that her spine could literally give way. Without urgent structural intervention, the weight of her upper body could cause her spine to suddenly collapse, potentially resulting in catastrophic and permanent damage to her spinal cord. Loretta needs another major spinal surgery: a spinal fusion. Right now, our biggest hope is simply to get Loretta safely through this surgery and give her the chance to come home.

Loretta has been unable to work since the middle of July, and she will not be able to return to work anytime soon. Her entire life has been put on hold while she fights to recover. She had just completed a year of nursing school while working full-time to help pay for her education. She has had to take a Leave of Absence from school, and thankfully her school has been incredibly understanding. Unfortunately, her monthly tuition payments still have to be made while she is on leave. I am a nurse, and I have been by Loretta’s side throughout all of this. I am currently on intermittent FMLA and using Paid Leave Oregon, but with Loretta unable to work and our medical and household expenses continuing to pile up, we are struggling. Our teenage boys are at home, essentially holding down the fort on their own. I spend roughly 80% of my time at the hospital with Loretta, 10% at home with our boys, and the remaining 10% trying to work whenever I can. I send meals to the boys every other night and restock their groceries each week. We also have a small farm with animals who still need feed and supplies every few weeks. And because Loretta is hospitalized about an hour and a half from home, the cost of driving back and forth to be with her has become another significant expense. Every dollar will help with the immediate expenses of keeping our family going—food, fuel, animal care, household bills, and Loretta’s nursing school tuition while she is on leave.

I also want to acknowledge something that weighs heavily on me. We very recently had a GoFundMe created for our family after the devastating loss of our daughter in April. The generosity and kindness people showed us during that unimaginable time helped carry us through a nightmare I never thought our family would have to endure. And now, only months later, we are facing another life-threatening crisis. To say this year has been difficult would be a tremendous understatement. It feels almost impossible to ask for help again. I have struggled with the feeling that we are asking too much. But the truth is, we desperately need help. Starting another GoFundMe was not something I ever imagined we would have to do, but after everything that has happened, it is the only way I can think of to help keep our family financially afloat while I focus on keeping Loretta alive, safe, and by my side. If you are able to donate, we would be so grateful. If you aren’t able to donate, we completely understand. Sharing this fundraiser, keeping Loretta in your thoughts, or simply sending a message means more to us than you know. We have been through more than any family should have to endure in one year. Thank you for loving our family, for standing beside us, and for helping us get through one more impossible chapter.