Help Protect Jeanne and Her Son From Ongoing Abuse

I’m writing this on behalf of my friend, who has been through more than anyone should ever endure. She would never ask for herself, so I am asking for her. Jeanne is one of the strongest, most amazing moms that I know, but right now she is in a fight that she can’t win alone.

Jeanne is a single mom to a bright, sensitive little boy. His father was never a partner to her — instead, he responded to her pregnancy with threats, intimidation, and abuse. When she later discovered his long criminal history, she knew she was going to have to fight to keep them safe. 

For years, Jeanne has faced relentless abuse and intimidation from her son’s father. He has a long history of using control, manipulation, and the court system itself against her. She was granted a three-year Protection From Abuse order last November, but the violations and harassment never stopped. She has been forced to sit in a courtroom for hours every single month following the month the PFA was granted with her abuser. 

Each time she goes back to court, she has to take off work. Each time she goes back to court, there are new delays, continuances, or prosecutors from the DA’s office who change from one hearing to the next. She has had to retell her story over and over, only to watch cases fall apart. Each hearing day, he has positioned himself to intercept Jeanne in the alley, the parking garage, or on the sidewalk, forcing her to dodge him and ask others to walk her in. She’s been told that “the best” they can do is walk the victims from the DA’s office to the courtroom. Nevermind the city and the courthouse surrounding it that she has to navigate.

The latest court hearing was the most exasperating yet. Her son’s father had been brazen enough to violate the PFA inside the courthouse. This was witnessed by two liaisons from the Y — and you would assume there was video surveillance inside that building. She reported the violation. She requested the video footage. She named the witnesses. Despite all of this, no video was ever produced for her case. The liaisons are considered neutral parties due to their role and cannot be compelled — or even asked apparently — to testify. The judge said there wasn’t even evidence “beyond a reasonable doubt” and he was found not guilty.

This has only given him fuel to continue as he always has, attempting to break someone who refuses to be broken.

Here are just a few nonviolent examples of what she has endured:

• When Jeanne refused repeated attempts by her son’s father to reunite with him, he began using their own son to punish her. He would shave their son’s head without her consent, nicking his skin in several places and causing their son to cry about it after he was returned home. 

• He would deliberately ruin supplies like turning a soiled diaper upside down over a whole month’s worth in the diaper bag after she had spent the last dime she had making sure she had enough supplied until she was paid again.

• He would withhold clothing that she had sent their son wearing for his visitation weekend, returning him in clothing at least two sizes too small and without his winter coat and gloves — three times, each time stating that he “accidentally” left them at a family member’s home but laughing at her as he pulled out of the driveway.

• He dodged child support for years by moving multiple times without notifying Domestics, intentionally working under the table, racking up over $10,000 in arrears while flaunting big purchases — including a new car — while taunting her about what she could have had she only agreed to become a family with him. His assets had to be frozen and jail time threatened before he finally retained a legal job. Again, this took years. Again, an example of how the system is broken. Their case worker told her that the father had moved and they didn’t know how to locate him. Uh… they had a custody order. Jeanne knew where he was. She was exchanging their child. Every. Two. Weeks.

• He messaged her in the middle of the night one Friday night during the beginning of his visitation weekend, claiming there was a human bite mark on their son’s leg, accused her of putting it there, and then refused to answer the phone or send a picture showing that her son was unharmed. Jeanne had to call the police, who were able to tell her (hours later) that they didn’t find a single mark on that child, let alone a bite mark. 

• He began telling their son at 4 years old that he was going to kill his mommy. Their son woke up at daycare wailing for her after she’d dropped him off, telling his teachers that his daddy was going to kill his mommy. She had to leave work. Her son had to physically see her before he would calm down. The daycare called CYS. CYS said, “Well, he’s only 4, so…” Nothing came of it.

• He told their son — again, at 5 years old — that he was going to stab Jeanne in the chest if she didn’t give him more custody time. She had already given him extra days on top of the court order, yet the threats continued.

Those are just the tip of the iceberg.

The impact on her son has been devastating. He panics if Jeanne leaves the room without him noticing. At night, he’s curled up on the floor beside her bed, afraid she won’t be there when he wakes up. Kindergarten should have been a joyful milestone, but instead it became a blur of trauma, a crisis day program, and eventually placement in a special classroom. No child should ever live in that kind of fear.

The toll on Jeanne has been just as heavy. She has missed more than 22 days of work caring for her son when his anxiety became overwhelming in addition to court dates, police reports, meetings with her lawyer, appointments with CYS, completing paperwork to get him services, removing him from a school with no resources available to help, attempting to secure therapy for her son. 

Her son is finally connecting with a therapist — but her insurance doesn't cover all of it. The copay is $25 every other week, plus she misses two hours of work each time. That may not sound like much to some, but to her it is crushing.

On top of that, life basics are collapsing all around her:

• Her 21-year-old car has finally died completely this very week and can’t be repaired.

• She fell behind on her gas bill; the company took the tanks, so she has no heat as the cold weather approaches and has had no stove for months.

• She lives alone, covering every bill on her own, while her son’s father lives with four other adults and splits expenses.

• She has already paid $700 toward her lawyer, but still owes $1,053 and has ongoing fees she can’t manage alone.

• She had fallen behind on her mortgage, recking her excellent credit score, drained her savings, and is living day-to-day using DailyPay just to survive between paychecks. Meanwhile, her son’s father owes nearly $10,000 in child support, yet somehow managed to hire a lawyer to sue her for custody.

I’m asking for help to raise $6,000. This will cover:

• Past-due and upcoming legal fees

• Critical household needs as winter approaches (heat, transportation)

• Therapy costs so her son can continue healing

• Lost wages from all the court dates and therapy appointments

To make matters worse, the recent news of three officers killed while serving a PFA has left Jeanne reeling. It was a chilling reminder that these threats are not just on paper — they are real, and they are dangerous. Instead of feeling safer with the protections she’s fought for, Jeanne is left with the growing belief that she is fighting alone to protect herself and her son.

If you can give, it will make an immediate difference. If you can’t donate, please share this — because every share is another chance for Jeanne and her son to get the support they need.