Help Honor Robert's Life and Legacy

On Monday, December 9th, my best friend, partner in crime, soulmate, and last of all, love of my life, passed suddenly. They are calling it a heart attack. The autopsy will find the reasoning behind the sudden death. Robert awoke me at 3:20 in the morning, screaming for me to call 911. He said he was having trouble breathing and getting air. By the time I got off the phone with the dispatch, he was in full sweat. They got him on the gurney. The last words I heard him speak before they gave him the oxygen mask were, "I love you, don't let me die."

Those words will forever ring in my ears.

He coded twice in the ambulance. The third time at the hospital, they could not save him.

For those that aren't aware, Robert was 179 days sober yesterday. He struggled on a daily basis. Our story wasn't over; this was the start of it. The fresh start.

The smile that would light up a dark room. The laughter that hid the tears and pain.

I want to keep writing because it brings so much joy to know how much you were loved.

I stayed by your side for 5 hours. I wasn't ready to leave, but I knew the time had come. Nothing more I could say would bring you back. I "slept" with your shirt last night, wrapped around my new cow... yes, you left, I needed a cow (stuffed).

I have people checking in. Love and support. I appreciate every single bit of it. I still long for your love. Your love for me was undoubtedly true. Love you always and forever.