Save a DID system: Help carry Hayden's burden

Hi, my name is Serisa and I'm asking for help on behalf of some of the most incredible people I have ever met, a Dissociative Identity System called Agora, helmed by Hayden Porter.

 

That may all sound strange to you, so let me break it down:

Dissociative Identity Disorder is a "complex psychological condition" once known as Multiple Personality Disorder, where a person develops separate "identities" (preferably called "alters") in response to immense trauma, starting under five years of age . Alters switch who is in "front", (which personality is present to the outside world), depending on their surroundings, usually by shock, instinct, or habit, but rarely intentionally. The alters often maintain their own memories and are consistently themselves as though they were separate people, and it is common for alters to feel uncomfortably out of touch with the world and themselves, which is the "dissociative" aspect of the disorder. Those who have this condition are known as "Dissociative Identity Systems" so as not to discount each alter as part of the person. While many Systems have a "host", meaning the original personality before the split, but some, like that of Agora, split at such a young age that the host never was able to gain enough of a sense of self and is more-or-less embodied entirely in the alters.

 

Interesting, right? But wait; who is Hayden Porter? (Note: This story involves violence and abuse to a child, which is often how D.I.D. comes into being. Please feel free to skip this part if you do not want the details.)

Among the first alters to appear in the Agora System was an "imaginary friend", (or so they thought), named Hayden Porter. Hayden was an older, kinder alter that was born out of the body's need to endure trauma. Since the body was so young and its other alters were also young, Hayden took over as the "grown up" the child needed to be in order to handle physical and emotional abuse and torment with a straight face, focusing on survival and protecting the other alters. In time, other alters developed to help him, such as Sean and Drake, who offer emotional support from inside, (which is necessary when you are a child with no access to outside help), and Aly, who is the alter-embodiment of the "fight" instinct in the "fight or flight" response, who would show up to fight back whenever the body was at its breaking point.

 

Over their lives, the Agora System learned how to subconsciously work together to cope with their trauma. They were never removed or rescued from their situation although it was made somewhat lighter when there was a divorce that removed the physical abuser from the home. Through sheer determination despite multiple suicide attempts, the System was able to survive into adulthood, a rare accomplishment among D.I.D. Trauma still continued, however, as their first attempt at settling down (still unaware that they had D.I.D. but certain they had Schizophrenia), ended up in divorce with two little girls under the age of 2. Now, every alter in the system was full of love for their daughters and each alter played their part in helping themselves be a single mom with no help from family and no place to go. Lara, an alter who was created by the need to do difficult tasks like cleaning and handling finances, helped get them enough aid to keep the three of them off the streets. I and a few other friends took turns helping at this time. It was my experience helping my friend here that convinced me that it is 100% possible for a D.I.D. System to be a good parent. The girls only needed to know who "Mommy" was, and the system was dedicated to being consistent for them. All of the trauma recovery was put on hold while all focus and resources went to the children.

 

A lot of hopes were put into the Agora System's second marriage. For a time, it seemed like a fairly normal family life would be possible. Unfortunately, however, that was not the case, and after nearly five years of marriage a second, much messier, ongoing divorce was started.

 

Having nowhere else to go, the System was forced to return to the home they had suffered so much suffering in, and this time with their daughters. Friends worked very hard to find a place for them. Eventually they were able to move in with a friend and her family, but all of the moving, the built-up feelings, and the only-partially treated trauma, had taken its toll.

 

Where we are now, and why we need help

Despite all of their work and effort, the Agora System still has many things weighing down on them, all of which we, their support group, and they themselves, have pursued many avenues to legally resolve them. In order to ensure their mental health does not falter, the System sees a D.I.D. specialist once or twice a week for counseling, where one or multiple alters are guided through the process of resolving their trauma. Both daughters are rekindling a relationship with their birth father under the watchful eyes of his parents, who also help in ensuring the girls are well-cared-for. Right now, both daughters are staying with them since, at this time, multiple alters are hitting an emotional wall and their ability to handle stress is at an all-time low. Hayden, despite knowing he would bring down the rest of the system, has become a "suicidal alter", and his despair and shame have culminated in the desire to quit.

 

Well, we who love and support Hayden and the Agora System as a whole want to help lighten the load. We know many of the things that are stressing Hayden out and have gotten his cooperation in doing all the necessary paperwork. Now all we need are the funds.

 

Our plan to help Hayden and free the Agora System from their situation:

 

 

Our promises: How we will make sure your funds go to good use

 

 

Other ways you can help

If you feel for our cause and want to help, we are always looking for more help in the following areas:

 

 

For more information about Dissociative Identity Disorder:

Here are some great resources for learning about Dissociative Identity Disorder. Please be aware that there is a lot about the disorder that is still being studied and a lot has changed about how clinicians treat it even in just the last few years, so make sure you are always reading the most up-to-date information.

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you very much for all your help! I can't tell you how much it means to us, and all of Agora.