Help for Rock and Audrey

If you know our families story you already know, but for those of you who don’t I will explain how we got here.

My hubby and I have been together since November of 1988. We are inseparable, that man is my life. Fast-forward to the future a bit, in late February 2024 our family was doing great talking about how weather was warming up and couldn’t wait to get out for our walks in the gardens soon. Kind of felt like we all had cabin fever. Hubby would wait in the parking lot to pick me up from work after his own long day at a job he’s been at for almost 22 years as a Security Captain at a county hospital. At that time hubby seemed more tired than usual, irritable and always had body aches and a headache. I appreciated him always and the sacrifices he made for our family never missing a day of work. Even on the days when his MS would flare up and he’d have episodes.

On the weekend of March 3rd we ran our usual errands, laundry and then food shopping. I told him to grab a piece of fruit or something because he wasn’t really acting himself and more like he needed a snickers. He snapped and cussed at me and stormed off for no apparent reason, not like him. He came back to me at a some point and apologized. Finally got home and just settling in, Rocky was looking for his show on demand when all of a sudden something switched off in his head and he had a grand mal seizure in the office chair he was sitting in. My CPR training kicked in as I straddled him in the chair so it didn’t fall over. It was the longest and scariest 5 minutes of my life! Trying to get him to respond after was also scary, confusing and heartbreaking. The ambulance took us to the hospital and after a few days of fearing the unknown, multiple MRI’s and blood tests later we received the diagnoses. Glioblastoma Multiforme brain cancer, a type of glioma, specifically a grade 4 astrocytoma, a malignant brain tumor. I immediately started reading up on it, I didn’t like anything I read.

We both put in for FMLA with our employers knowing we would need the time. Rock started radiation and chemo a few weeks after his brain surgery to remove the tumor. 6 weeks of that, he was a true fighter smiling every day through it all. Soon after that he started chemo for one week every month.

In April we applied Rock for disability and I went back to work for a week to help hire 42 new staff. It felt weird, like something was up. Sure enough I was right, in the end of June my manager told me my position was being eliminated August 1st. I had a month to line up another job. At this point we only had one income coming in, we had family help which was a godsend because SSDI told us we had to wait 5 months to make sure he was completely disabled.

September rolled around and still no luck after countless interviews and applications with getting a job. It felt hopeless. We didn’t qualify for any assistance because according to Social Services $2000 a month income for a couple was too much, crazy right!?! We couldn’t make the rent and the landlord sent the Marshall’s. $5600, was paid in back rent just to keep a roof over our head even if it was temporary. So here I am job searching, apartment searching, taking care of hubby, attending appointments for hubby and going to unemployment twice a week.

I could barely sleep, I could barely eat, but really sure how I did anything.

Suddenly hubby had another grand mal seizure and later started having focal seizures pretty much back to back between August through October and they started him on steroids. After starting his chemo treatment in October, three days in the seizures were pretty bad and he was admitted to the hospital. They stopped the chemo after reviewing his MRI and said he couldn’t use that form of chemo anymore. His Neuro-Oncologist suggested immunotherapy treatment with Avastin infusions. We agreed and scheduled his first appointment.

Finally! I got a call in November for a job I applied for months earlier and we found a place to move to.

I started my new job December 2nd as HR Assistant with an ambulance company. Their records were a mess, the hiring process was all over the place so many hands in pot, it was a recipe for disaster! I didn’t know what a mess I was getting into. Apparently, I was hired right before their state audit and they just really needed all their files to be up-to-date within two weeks time. I knew it was gonna be impossible. But I got most of it done with the exception of a few files.

On Christmas Eve, my manager brought me into her office and told me they were letting me go because I want fast enough. ON CHRISTMAS EVE! I felt like such a failure. I worked really hard training in their systems and getting all of their personnel folders up-to-date to clear state. But yet the next day was Christmas and I needed to make it count for hubby and the family. That was rough.

On December 27th my hubby got his first immunotherapy infusion, it went well. We moved into the new place on December 28th. On January 2 my husband had his second immunotherapy in our new place. There was a bit of hope with a new place and treatment in place now I just needed a job!

I got a job offer!

Unfortunately our joy was short-lived. A few days after my husband received his infusion he ended up with a fever and his feet swollen, I was concerned and called the cancer treatment center. They told me to bring him in, but at that point he was beyond what they could do and he was admitted to the hospital again. This time he was unable to walk and they found blood clots in his lungs and his leg. Blood clots in the lungs was a possible side effect of the immunotherapy that he received. We did not expect for him to have a possible side effect.

A couple of weeks later my husband was doing better, but still unable to walk. The hospital said he needed rehab. It took us forever to find a rehab that was still close to home and could give him the care treatment he needed. But we finally found one and he was on his way in January 21st.

During the first few weeks he was walking and he was doing great and I happily stepped into my new roll as Customer Service Rep/ Accounts Receivable Clerk on January 27th.

All was good until on day 5 at my new job I felt super sick suddenly with fever, everyone in the office was wearing masks all week. I got sent home and come to find out I had Covid. Not only that but the four other staff also had the flu and Covid before I started working there. I immediately let the rehab know to test hubby. Needless to say I had to take six days off just as I started my new job. I found out that my hubby tested positive for the flu, and that they were treating him. Once I was cleared and able to go see him at the rehab I went to see him and noticed that he was gasping for air and called in the nurse manager. He was admitted the next day again to the hospital only to find out that he had pneumonia, the flu, and a UTI.

I had to go back to work, unfortunately. Once I returned, I hopped right in and got busy. Things were really good there. Then the flu went around in the office again, and I immediately started taking Emergency-C hoping not to become the victim of the office strain. I did get it, but it really only hit for a couple days and I was able to tolerate the rest and return to work after two days out.

Hubby was getting worse after he had pneumonia and could no longer walk or use his right arm. The rehab he was at thought that it would be a good idea to send him to the emergency room. My husband was again admitted to the hospital.

Fast-forward to April 4th, I woke up really sick to my stomach and was having a lot of gastrointestinal issues. I took some Imodium and some Pepto and notified my boss that I may be a little late. Two hours later and I was still in the same situation, so my boss called me to see what was going on and after I told him he just told me to take the day. I agreed only because I saw no end to this pain that I was currently going through and I would have the weekend to recover. Sunday was rough, but Monday morning was rougher and I text my manager and told him I needed to go to urgent care. Unable to move from the bed I found out that there’s such a thing as telehealth urgent care! The doctor I had my appointment with was very thorough and I was so sure that it was just a stomach virus, but she told me she thought it was my gallbladder. I was in disbelief until I tried to get out of bed. I went off in a cab to the ER. While on my way my boss finally called me only to tell me they were letting me go due to excessive absences. I begged for my job and explained most of my absences were from Covid which is an absence covered by NY state, but they wouldn’t budge on their decision. Feeling broken, both emotionally and physically I sat and cried in that cab all the way to the ER. Once there, they ran all their tests and sure enough it was my gallbladder and I needed surgery immediately because it was infected. I had surgery the next morning and they removed three golf both sized gallstones amongst others along with my gallbladder. As soon as I was able to walk, I made my way just a few floors up from me to visit my husband. Both of us admitted to the hospital for different reasons.

A few days after surgery come to find out I had cellulitis and had to take doxycycline.

Hubby was admitted to hospice it was a great place. I visited him everyday as I have since January when he went into rehab. I was his caregiver for 9 months while he was home and I knew he was better when I was around…I was better too.

On May 7th Rock (Anthony) took his last breath. Words can’t express the loss of a loved one, but not so the loss of the love of your life. He was honorable, lovable, funny, sweet, respectful and revered by many and will be missed very much. His legacy will live on in his children. His silly catch phrases will be used constantly to remind us he’s still here in some way. We will tell his goofy Dad jokes and speak of him often. He will never be forgotten.

But here we are present day and you’re wondering why such a long story, what’s the point that you’re trying to make.

Well, when we moved in January our account for Electric was closed and a new one opened at the new address. I was unaware it would be a different account. My first bill in my new place was just about $500, not too bad considering I was now paying for heat. I paid the bill. I still had not received notification of the other electric account for which I had an installment plan on for over $3000 (the last place we lived at only checked gas meters once a year so it was always a game of catch up). So while I was laid up recovering from my surgery I went in to my app to pay March’s bill and WHAT!?!? They tacked the full amount from the other account in whole onto this one! I called and asked about the installment plan I had and they told me that was on another account and my response was, “So were those charges.”. I asked about adding another installment to this current amount on my account and the rep said they would need a down payment. I thought great, I can do this because I was prepared already to pay $500. Then she told me it would be the $500 down + an additional $310 monthly on top of my regular monthly bill! She also told me that they do not extend the installment plan past 12 months due to a new law in New York. I do not qualify for unemployment, the energy program called HEAP ended on April 7th. I heard back regarding assistance from Social Services after applying, and because I just updated them about my new job offer we do not qualify. So much for being an honest person.

My income is currently $2100 a month which just covers rent. I’m applying for jobs daily and attending interviews, hoping to land something quickly. (UPDATE! I GOT OFFERED A JOB! I STARTED 5/5.) But again none of it could come fast enough to help cover urgent bills, food etc. because even with a new job I won’t see a full paycheck for weeks.

On May 21st our cat Loki, a certified support animal needed to be taken to the vet for what we thought was a broken paw but it turned out to be a fracture. That bill was $544, but needed to be paid to get his treatment.

With the money raised so far I was able to put a down payment, but now I need to pay the rest before we’re turned off. I’ve included the most recent picture of notice from the electric company.

I’m not one to ask for help, but I’m desperate. Our family has struggled with illness, bad luck and heart break and now death for a year now. I don’t know how much longer I can remain as strong as I have when everything is falling apart around me. I need the help of my family, friends and my community. Please help our family to pay urgent bills and help relieve some of our current stress. All donations are appreciated and considered a blessing. Thank you for listening.