Hi.

Chances are, if you're reading this and you know me, you understand how hard it is for me to do what I'm about to do--and that's asking for help. I'll go into some detail about what has happened below, but for the TL; DR crowd, I currently cannot work and am staring bankruptcy in the face. I've been living off of my credit cards and a cashed-out 401k since the pandemic and I'm now about a month away from no longer being able to pay my bills, put gas in my car, or go grocery shopping. I'm awaiting gastric bypass surgery (tentatively scheduled for September) and need a cushion through the end of the year. At present, $5000 is what I'll need to survive as I have surgery and begin graduate school. Anything you can do is greatly and lovingly appreciated and if you cannot donate (I get it, times are tough) if you could share the GoFundMe, I would be incredibly grateful.

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If you're interested in knowing more about what has happened, read below...

How did Erin get to this point?

As I'm discovering for myself, there are a lot of ways people fall on challenging times. For me, there was an entire series of events that have taken me to this point. Here is the abridged version.

In 2017, I was laid off from my job where I had been working for more than 10 years. The healthcare industry had shifted, and we were unable to continue executing our business model because insurance ceased to pay the rates we could afford. I had JUST completed my MS degree in Management (with a hefty loan) and found myself unemployed and suffering from Complex Post Traumatic Stress (CPTSD) from not being able to effectively help the company, having to lay off coworkers I had known for years, and dealing with an irate customer base who wanted answers I couldn't give. I was out of work for 6 months before landing a job at another healthcare company. It was a nice place. The people were kind, but in addition to mental health issues that were consistently plaguing me, I also started to suffer from edema in my legs and ankles, numbness in my feet, foot drop and balance problems, severe back pain, clustering migraine headaches, insomnia, uncontrollable panic attacks, and neurological issues. It was as though all the stress I had been carrying flipped a switch and manifested itself through my physical being. As a result, I had to quit the job I was working and decided to file for disability while I made some extra money working at the Renaissance Festival and the Strand Theater, which equaled less than $5000 a year in total. I worked with my doctor, my therapist, and a case worker for more than two years to qualify for disability in the State of Maryland and was denied each time.

When disability let me down, I decided to take the advice of my primary doctor and my therapist to investigate weight loss surgery. I started the process in 2019 and was feeling very good about things. I had saved enough money to get by and my prognosis was good. It’s clear I’m going to need back surgery and a hip replacement from the damage to my body caused by two decades of playing sports while fat, but it’s a step in the right direction for me. Then COVID-19 showed up, the world shut down, and everything went to hell. Which brings us to now.

While being the Associate Artistic Director at the Strand was a full-time job I truly loved, not many people know that my partner Elena and I are, for the most part, volunteers. We’d make very small amounts of money when shows went well, but it was nothing like a living wage. The hours we spent producing shows, creating social media, writing grants, collaborating with artists, building relationships with the neighborhood and maintaining the space were done for love and not money. And love doesn’t put food on the table or money in the bank. I’m currently on Maryland Medicaid and, while they are covering most of my surgical expenses, there has been an onslaught of obstacles that have continually pushed my surgery back for more than two years. For instance, I found out today that none of the doctors available to do my psych eval take any insurance and the cheapest out-of-pocket rate is $300. I’m also still awaiting a sleep study, which insurance has denied twice even though they require the test. It's all very frustrating.

In the spirit of transparency, I won’t pretend like I haven’t made some poor financial decisions based on my available cash flow. I’ve invested my money in local theaters and non-profits and helped friends financially when I didn’t have the means to do so. I purchased things I didn’t need so much as wanted, and I’ve generally lived off credit cards, which is rule number one on how NOT to adult. I screwed up. But the good news is, I have a plan.

~The Plan~

As I await my gastric bypass surgery and then recover from it. I have made a plan for my future goals. I have recently been accepted by Southern New Hampshire University for a Master of Arts Degree in History with concentrations in American and European Histories. This degree will also assist me in obtaining my teaching certificate. If you’ve known me since I was a teenager, you know history, historical character interpretation, and museum docentry are things I’ve always been interested in pursuing. Likewise, I feel it’s time to go back to where I began my career in 2001, which is the classroom. While I wasn’t fully prepared to be a classroom teacher the first time around, I believe interacting with students is a strength of mine. I’m looking forward to the challenge. Pair that with improving my physical health and I have lots to look forward to—if I can just make it through.

If you've made it this far, I cannot thank you enough for caring about me and my situation. Please know I wouldn't do this if my circumstances weren't emergent. I thank you in advance for your support, your shares, and your encouragement.