Help Dorka Escape Abuse and Poverty

Hello, and thank you for looking at this GoFundMe! My name is Simon, and I’m making this fundraiser on behalf of my best friend, Dorka. She desperately needs our help to escape her abusive, hazardous, and destitute living situation!

Dorka is a 24-year-old Hungarian artist with autism. She has been making art since she was a child, and she is known by some for her influential fan art for shows like OK KO, Danny Phantom, and Jentry Chau vs The Underworld. Dedicating her soul to honing her skills and getting good grades, Dorka believed that she could create a better life for herself through hard work and focus—but to this day, she is still trapped, living in misery and in fear.

Imagine a tiny, barely 500-square-foot apartment in the poorest neighborhood of the city. It's dilapidated, with bare electrical wires, faulty plumbing, a broken-down stove, and it’s infested with black mold and various pests. Food is scarce, and hunger is as constant as the ever-looming threat of eviction. Dorka’s family of five (5) live here.

Most days, Dorka will either wake up to the incessant hammering of her mother’s sewing machine or to her father cursing and shouting abuse. She will climb down from the top of the rickety bunk bed she has been sharing with her brother for more than a decade, still tired and aching from a restless night of breathing stale air and sleeping on a thin slice of foam, and she will make her way from the small room where she and her brother sleep to the only full-size room of their apartment: the living room. All the while, she will walk past stacks of junk and clothes that have been hoarded over the years by her family.

On good days, there might be a small pastry (which she bought for herself) waiting for her in the cramped kitchen, but most of the time it’s either a slice of bread or nothing for breakfast. Regardless, her next step is always to go to her old desktop computer, and this is where she will stay for the rest of the day and well into the night for a chance to talk to her online friends in other countries and to escape the nightmare she lives through 24/7.

Although the solace of the internet has been her distraction from hunger and loneliness for many years, Dorka doesn’t spend all day at her desk by choice. She has simply learned that doing anything else around the apartment will lead to aggression from another member of her family.

If she gets up to seek out a belonging of hers that has inevitably been buried by new layers of junk, there's an argument because her mother hates when Dorka tries to move or clean the hoard. If she gets up to socialize with another member of her family, she is frequently dismissed by anyone who isn’t her mother, and her father actively insults her voice and the things she dares to share. Even sometimes when she simply gets up to go to the bathroom, her father might physically block her way and bully her about her toilet paper usage—even though Dorka already uses so little toilet paper that she often doesn’t feel clean. Basically, if Dorka decides to do anything other than computer time, someone in her family is bound to complain at some point. Crafts? Music? Taking selfies? Stretching? Walking around the room? Even the most benign things we take for granted can lead to consequences for Dorka. Sometimes even just sitting at her computer in silence is not enough to keep the peace, and her father will eventually harass her or try to pick a fight with her—supposedly just because he can.

The greatest source of conflict in Dorka’s family is absolutely her father. His go-to forms of communication are shouting, threatening, and throwing insults, and what’s worse is that he has a history of physical abuse. Dorka recalls many instances of being pushed, kicked, punched, and having things thrown at her by her father when she was too young to protect herself. And tragically, Dorka’s two siblings have learned the “if you can’t beat him, join him,” approach to self-preservation, so they often bully and demean her, just like their father does.

In many ways, Dorka has become the family scapegoat, and she is treated as a freak for her autism.

What I have described so far is only a fraction of the obstacles, neglect, and abuse that Dorka experiences in her everyday life, but it’s already more suffering than anyone deserves to go through. And for someone as kind and as giving as my friend, her circumstances are downright heartbreaking.

All Dorka wants is to be free and to be treated with respect and love.

Many of us in different countries can trust to some degree that we have options. We trust that there is someone to call when we have an emergency. We trust that there is somewhere we can go to report abuse or to seek safe refuge. We trust that there are safety nets or people we can reach out to when things get desperate. But in Hungary, these things are limited for many people—and they are practically nonexistent for someone as poor and as vulnerable as my friend Dorka. Resented by her family and susceptible to dangers through her country’s unfortunate layers of corruption, she has no one else to turn to but the internet: to compassionate strangers and to the friends she has made through her art and fandoms.

Dorka is my best friend and has been for nearly four years now, and every day I’m still blown away by how kind she is. She loves drawing gifts and setting up little surprises for people, and even when she has so little, she does her best to help others in need. Dorka has had such a difficult life due to misunderstood autism, paralyzing social anxiety, abuse, neglect, no medical care, no counseling, and no proper social services, but she still remains hopeful for a future.

Ever since Dorka first began entrusting me with details about her life, I have been doing everything I can to support her emotionally and socially: being a listening ear, advising her on her situation using my own experiences and research, offering her distractions and little bits of joy whenever possible, and also giving small allowances from my wage to help her stay afloat. But I’ve known for some time now that her circumstances are much bigger than she and I can handle on our own, and this is why we seriously need your help.

Our ultimate goal is to get Dorka to the United States where she can live with me and be around other people who respect her and care for her well-being. But there are steps that must happen before that. Please read the Goals listed below for a summary of how we intend to optimize your generous funding.

In my family, we recognize that money doesn’t solve all of life’s problems, but it does give a person options—which can be lifesaving. So please consider donating! And if you are not able, please please share this fundraiser with other people in your social circles. Every single donation, big or small, makes a huge difference to my desperate friend who has only ever known poverty.

For more details about Dorka and her situation and to see more photos, please feel free to visit this Google Doc I have put together.

Goals:

Thank you so much for your time! You make a difference in this world!

Simon ♥